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Paying dog fees

(104 Posts)
Lucyloo12 Mon 03-Apr-23 22:53:30

I have a friend whose dog needs an op which is going to cost £2000. He has asked me if I could pay it. I love the dog but she is not mine. I feel it is alot of money but also feel that I don't want to see her suffer. What am I to do? I am so torn.... I feel guilty if I don't pay as he can't afford it but pressured to pay. I am really upset and don't know what to do. Please give me your opinions. Thank you.

Summerlove Mon 03-Apr-23 22:56:19

Thats a huge amount of money to ask from someone!

IF you choose to pay - I would want a strict repayment schedule. Even if/Especially if the dog still dies.

I dont think I could pay though.

MiniMoon Mon 03-Apr-23 23:26:34

I'm afraid I wouldn't offer to pay for this dog to have the operation.
We took out pet insurance fir every dog we have owned.
Is there a PDSA clinic near you, they do free or reduced cost treatment which includes surgery.
Here is a link to their eligibility form. Perhaps that will help.

GrannyRose15 Mon 03-Apr-23 23:42:31

The responsibility is his. If you own a dog you have to be prepared to pay for it. Don’t fall for his emotional blackmail. Yes you love the dog but that doesn’t mean you should be pressurised into for paying for it. It is a vast sum of money. Even if I could easily afford it I wouldn’t be granting this request for funds whether as a loan or a gift.

Charleygirl5 Mon 03-Apr-23 23:53:50

I agree, that money is far too much and where does it end? If the dog needed drugs afterwards, they are not cheap. I am sorry but people should give some thought before looking after an animal without the funds to pay for anything.

Even the annual visit to the vet for vaccinations is now an expensive trip.

Please do not be guilt-tripped into doing it whether or not you can afford it.

Cheeseplantmad Mon 03-Apr-23 23:55:02

I feel the same as other op’s as I wouldn’t offer to pay either , what’s going to happen after the operation, surly the dog would need ongoing treatment that’s going to cost lot more on top of the bill already ? Also , what if the dog needed some other treatment further down the line ? When would his asking for your money stop ?
Check out if any local PDSA vets in your area , you can get help with them if on certain benefits , also most private vets will set up a monthly payment plan so it’s easier to afford payments .
When someone takes on a pet they need to have something in place for when these type of things happen. I really feel that your friend shouldn’t have put you in this awful situation in the first place , it’s his duty as master of the dog to sort it out himself .

crazyH Tue 04-Apr-23 00:09:35

I would lend her the money, but would ask her to sign an IOU. I have lent (or loaned?) money to friends and family, but always had a written agreement regarding repayment. And I’ve always been repaid.

Georgesgran Tue 04-Apr-23 00:24:05

Without more detail, a difficult issue to comment on. Why has your friend asked you? Are you an easy option, or a last resort? Would this be a one-off to cure the dog - perhaps a simple operation? Otherwise, where might it lead and how would it end?
Can you easily afford it - my motto is only to lend if you can afford to lose it.
Should you then agree to set up a repayment plan and it’s not honoured, where would you stand? Legal means to recover the debt? The end of your friendship?
I think I agree with others - not your dog and really not your responsibility. Can your friend not raise funds another way - a bank loan or pay by credit card and do a long balance transfer? Perhaps the vet’s practice offers a payment plan - some do.

BlueBelle Tue 04-Apr-23 03:57:50

No I wouldn’t give him the money, if he can’t pay himself now you won’t see the money back and it ll spoil the whole friendship, however by not giving it to him , you ll probably spoil the friendship anyway and feel guilty so a very bad position to put you in

He has no right asking you and putting you in this position

Grammaretto Tue 04-Apr-23 06:12:12

I agree with CrazyH offer to lend the money if can afford to, on strict condition it is repaid.
This would be an interest free loan if they can't do it any other way.
My DD dog had a £1000 operation to remove a tumour.
She survived only a few weeks.

SuzieHi Tue 04-Apr-23 08:21:16

Friend shouldn’t have asked you. Say sorry you’ve thought very hard about this but won’t be able to help. You don’t have to discuss why. Maybe suggest they ask the vet for ideas of where to get financial help, payment options or charities to help?

argymargy Tue 04-Apr-23 08:27:08

Absolutely not. If he can’t afford insurance he shouldn’t have a dog. What sort of person would ask this of a friend?

Oopsadaisy1 Tue 04-Apr-23 08:34:26

We willingly paid for our DDs dog to have several ops, however we could afford to do it and we loved her little dog who survived for several years afterwards and who died recently.

If you can’t afford it then don’t give it.

Personally I couldn’t watch a beloved pet (that I knew) die knowing that I could have saved it.

NanaDana Tue 04-Apr-23 08:46:21

Don't know how close a friend this is, Lucyloo12, but IMHO it's still a bit of a cheek for him to ask you for £2000 to pay for his dog's operation. Quite apart from the fact that this could be the thin end of the wedge, and having paid up front you may feel morally obliged to continue with any ongoing funding.. which could be significant.. it's HIS responsibility, not yours. If he's that financially strapped refer him to PDSA, as that's what they're there for. You're not a Charity.. they are. As an aside, I feel that anyone who cannot afford to pay for pet insurance should think very hard before they bring a pet into the home.

Doodledog Tue 04-Apr-23 08:46:26

The moralising about what the friend should have done won’t help the dog, and his lack of insurance can’t be altered now.

I agree that you are in a difficult position, Lucyloo. Much depends on whether you can afford it and whether you think the friend would pay you back. If you don’t think he can, or if not getting the money back would cause you hardship I wouldn’t lend it, and there is no need to feel guilty about that. If you can afford it, you could ask for a signed and witnessed payment IOU, and for your friend to set up a standing order. Giving an interest-free loan is a kind gesture and one that a true friend would do IMO if they don’t need the money. You should not run yourself short though.

As others have said, a halfway measure would be to help him find other means of financing the op. Do vets do payment plans? Or could he cover it with a credit card? He might even get an interest-free one, which would make the situation easier.

sodapop Tue 04-Apr-23 08:49:35

That is a difficult position to be in lucyloo I'm not sure if you mean your friend wanted to borrow the money or was expecting you to pay for some reason.
No one wants to see an animal suffer but £2000 is a lot for a dog which is not yours. Has your friend looked at alternatives such as PDSA. If you can afford to lend him the money then do so with a proper agreement for repayment. Make it clear though that this is a one off situation and you will not be lending any more money.

Smileless2012 Tue 04-Apr-23 08:53:24

This is difficult. If I could afford to lend the money over a long period of time I'd do so, with a written agreement that it be repaid on a monthly basis with the amount to be paid each month written into the agreement.

I'd also say it's a one off, and I wouldn't be able to do so again. Like you Oopsadaisy I couldn't do nothing but I do agree that you shouldn't have been asked to begin with.

NotSpaghetti Tue 04-Apr-23 08:57:59

I assume this is a friend "in real life" - not over the Internet as you say you love his dog...

If the 2,000 is easy and you are close I would do it in the full knowledge that there may be more to come. If it was a dear friend of mine i would naturally want to help.

Ideally they would be wanting to repay you - eventually. Have they spoken about a loan or just "will you pay"?

Grammaretto Tue 04-Apr-23 09:00:15

A young single mum I knew was landed with a vets bill when her kitten was hit by a car
She offered to work at the vets to pay off the debt which she did. She cleaned out the cages etc for weeks
She was a slightly crazy girl in a nice way she bought a horse with her child benefit money and called him Ben.

Iam64 Tue 04-Apr-23 09:08:03

I can’t imagine asking anyone to pay my dogs vet bills. I’d be shocked if anyone asked me to pay such a large amount. I paid a £30 vet bill for my youngest daughter when they had two small children and limited income, she didn’t ask me to and tried to pay me back.
You don’t detail this friendship but this kind of request would be a red flag for me other than from one of my adult children. Although, I know they wouldn’t ask this of me

foxie48 Tue 04-Apr-23 09:45:54

I have a rule when it comes to money. If it is an amount I can afford to lose if I want to help that person then I will. I'd rather any spare money goes to help people I care for than sit in a bank or investment earning interest. If there is an offer to pay me back, I accept it but don't expect to see any of it and it wouldn't spoil a relationship if they didn't pay me back. However, although not rich I do have spare income and sufficient savings so I can afford to be generous and it makes me happy to see others happy.

Fleurpepper Tue 04-Apr-23 10:01:34

argymargy

Absolutely not. If he can’t afford insurance he shouldn’t have a dog. What sort of person would ask this of a friend?

Well, yes, but not the poor dog's fault. I'd be so torn- what a position to be in. PDSA?

midgey Tue 04-Apr-23 10:04:36

I’m afraid I wouldn’t lend it, couldn’t actually. But isn’t the saying Don’t loan money you cannot afford to lose?

Hetty58 Tue 04-Apr-23 10:16:30

I'd be just the same as crazyH - lend the money with a formal signed payment agreement. The welfare of the dog would be most important to me.

Still, a word of caution - speak to the vet yourself, for two reasons. First, they may arrange a payment plan themselves - and second, I've heard about 'vet bills' that were actually gambling debts (so, sadly, I don't trust people these days).

Foxygloves Tue 04-Apr-23 10:21:46

Good point Hetty - at the very least, speak to the vets.
Nobody wants an animal to suffer of course but there may be more to this than meets the eye.