Serious cat dilemma

Aveline

Oh yes. It's doors shut in their house!
Our own two rehomed cats are very happy together despite one being from California and one from Finland.

My apologies - I took this to mean that you had brought the cats to this country rather than you having acquired them from someone else who imported them

eddiecat78

I don't understand why people import rescue cats - and dogs - from overseas when UK rescue centres are bursting at the seams

Indeed, totally get it, in the UK. But this is NOT the point here.

Aveline, sorry some are giving you a bad time. You need to help your daughter with re-homing- and first sit down with her, and her with her family, to decide which cat needs re-homing, and fast.

Do you know anyone without a cat or other animal, or young children- who could foster him for a while to see how he is when on his own- and then re-home from there. Good luck.

Have to say, I see families adding pets of all different shapes, sizes, ages- for fun, without ever thinking it might not work and lead to all sorts of issues and very hard decisions- and never ever thinking of 'what if ... what then'. Not saying this is the case here btw.

eddiecat78

I don't understand why people import rescue cats - and dogs - from overseas when UK rescue centres are bursting at the seams

Aveline didn't say she did import them.

Time to RTFOP for "some posters", I think.
"Re-home? Euthanise? Both seem too radical but the situation is bad. " Aveline Wed 19-Jul-23 21:32:56 Aveline Wed 19-Jul-23 21:32:56
Why take the instant view that the OP would import cats from the ends of the earth and/or gladly advocate euthanasia as a first resort for problems?

I didn't import our cats. We rehomed them from a breeder who didn't want them any more.
I can't seem to get over to you that I was trying to look at all possible solutions across a whole spectrum. It's hard to see why some people on here just don't get it. I'm not trying to 'do myself any favours'.

I don't understand why people import rescue cats - and dogs - from overseas when UK rescue centres are bursting at the seams

Oh god Aveline. You really aren’t doing yourself any favours here

Oops......sorry! Ignore the above, just leant on my phone!

Iii

For the life of me I can't imagine why killing this fine-looking fellow was even an outside option!

Here's the cuprit

Oh yes. It's doors shut in their house!
Our own two rehomed cats are very happy together despite one being from California and one from Finland.

On a practical note, the boys will have to keep their bedroom doors shut.

Does anyone else feed him or is it just your DD who does? He might develop 'cupboard love' if they take it in turns.

It seems cat 1 has the what's called pecking order

Yes, he's Top Cat. He may not like the men in the family but might still feel jealous if they make a fuss of cat No. 2

Can they try to encourage him to be more friendly with them, starting with SIL in case he scratches? At the same time ignoring Cat No 2.

Another idea- has the vet checked his thyroid function? An over-active thyroid can cause them to urinate frequently.
Or a hormonal imbalance?

Try another vet?

Well, these things happen when you have animals.
As a pet owner, one needs to be prepared for such events and be able to deal with them appropriately.

No question, one has to be re-homed. I think the fair thing would be to re-home the younger cat. But if he does not get on with the rest of the family, I could understand if they choose to re-home the older one. Asap.

Cats are solitary by nature and most of them would far rather be only cats. I adopted 2 cats from the same home and assumed they were a bonded pair. It turned out Big Cat was a bully and Little Cat was scared of him. I considered re homing one but spent months working on their relationship and the bullying has stopped.
If I had one weeing everywhere I wouldn’t hesitate to rehome one. You’ll be doing them both a favour.

grandtanteJE65

OP if I read your post correctly, although the male was not happy about the introduction of the female two years ago, this problem has only just started.

Therefore, my experience of cats tells me that it has little or nothing to do with the female cat.

The advice to get a second opinion from another vet is sound, as in my long experience of cats, if a formerly housetrained one starts deliberately peeing or soiling places he knows very well he shouldn't, something is wrong, and unhappily is very likely to be a physical illness, rather than the cat just being in a huff.

If space in the home allows, your daughter could try dividing the house up into male cat's territory and female cat's, but do advise her to have the male cat checked for bladdder , kidney, liver disease and prostate trouble - he may be weeing whereever he is when he can if he has an enlarged prostate

I so agree with this. It took my DS several trips. to the vet and lots of tests eventually the cat was diagnosed as diabetic.

Thanks. Needless to say people aren't very happy to find he's peed on their pillows or soft toys or clean ironing. He really has had a full work up from the vet.
A cat we once had was diagnosed with a brain tumour aged 10. A lovely boy. He began behaving quite out of character. It was awful. Am still sad about him.
I'll pass on all your suggestions to DD who is very distressed about it.

Aveline I'm wondering how the family members react when he pees in inappropriate places? Do they show anger or shout at him?And how often the cats are played with? People often think that cats can just be left to their own devices but they are social creatures and need play to occupy them. I appreciate that he has access to the outdoors but something is spooking him indoors. My instinct would be that this is a stress response rather than a physical illness as you say that the vet has checked for the obvious things. As another poster has said, 8 is still young for a cat. One of mine is 19 and is displaying some traits of dementia but she is continent and clean though needs help with grooming. I would urge you to at least look at some FAQs around cat behavioural issues. Vicky Halls is very good though sadly she no longer does telephone consultations. You'll find her easily via Google.

8 is nothing Aveline. Most cats live until they're older than 14.

Has the vet done a urine test to check for cystitis?

The vet has given him a thorough once over. Nothing found. He's a funny wee thing. He likes me and DD. I looked after him when he was tiny and the family were away so he's always ok with me but spits and strikes out at SiL and the DGSs. Another thought I had was that this is some sort of early dementia. He's 8 now.

Aveline

They are outside cats and don't use a litter tray.

Maybe Cat No. 1 can't hold on long enough to go outside.

They are outside cats and don't use a litter tray.

OP if I read your post correctly, although the male was not happy about the introduction of the female two years ago, this problem has only just started.

Therefore, my experience of cats tells me that it has little or nothing to do with the female cat.

The advice to get a second opinion from another vet is sound, as in my long experience of cats, if a formerly housetrained one starts deliberately peeing or soiling places he knows very well he shouldn't, something is wrong, and unhappily is very likely to be a physical illness, rather than the cat just being in a huff.

If space in the home allows, your daughter could try dividing the house up into male cat's territory and female cat's, but do advise her to have the male cat checked for bladdder , kidney, liver disease and prostate trouble - he may be weeing whereever he is when he can if he has an enlarged prostate

My suggestion would be to have 2 litter trays just in case cat 1 doesn't like going in after cat 2 has used it.
Change the type of litter you are using. Maybe cat 1 doesn't like it anymore. I use a paper pellet one from B&M or Pets at home or online. Bio Catolet.
Another suggestion, when I had 3 cats of my own I adopted a relatives cat who died and was 12 years old at the time. She was an only cat and lived alone with with him all that time.
What I did was to buy some thin sliced ham in a packet and when they were all in my living room , door shut was to break some of the ham into small pieces and offered to each of the cats in turn. Let adopted cat have a sniff although she sat away from the others and gave her some and she eventually came and ate with the others. I've not known a cat yet to turn down ham.
You could try the same with 'Dreamies' treats. Cats love them. Put just a few on the floor a little bit apart at first. Put some down for cat 1 first.
Meal times put cat 1's bowl down first and then cat 2 a bit further apart.
Another thing I did was to buy what I called a thing on a stick. A toy. A longish stick with feathers or such at the end. Move it around on the floor for each cat to play with close by.
They liked a laser light pen. A pet one. Shine it all around the room and they chase after the small spotlight and play together. Not to be shone in the eyes.
I think daughter needs to slowly get them intermingled.
It seems cat 1 has the what's called pecking order.
I have a tall cat tree although they are expensive where one cat can sit at the top feeling superior.
Cat one doesn't seem to like attention being given to cat 2. He wants it all to himself and rues the day cat 2 moved in and feeling a bit jealous that's why I've suggested above.
They may only ever tolerate each other but good luck.