Serious cat dilemma

Euthanising in this situation is cruel. The poor cat was there first and it was happy. They need to find a nice home where it can be the only cat or rehome the second cat.

Is he peeing because he is distressed or is he spraying and marking his territory, warning her not to go near anywhere that he thinks belongs to your DD?

I'm not used to cats and not that keen on them, in fact, but couldn't euthanise a healthy animal.

Can you contact an animal psychologist?

Otherwise, one would have to be rehomed I think.

Hopefully vets wouldnt pts a healthy cat. A new home should be sought for one of the cats. A ragdoll will not be difficult to rehome. Cats are quite longlived - our cats all made 16+ and some lived until their early 20s.

Have they tried using Feliway? www.feliway.co.uk/ Before doing anything else they could try this.

PTS a healthy animal would be an appalling thing to do and I hope no vet would countenance that. Rehoming one of the cats sounds like the best solution if the situation is irretrievable.

I don't have cats at the moment though I have in the past .
I've not had a problem as described .
Cat loving friends use Feliway products bought from Amazon to solve behavioural problems .

Worth a try ?

Otherwise , I'd give one of the cats away .

I agree with Callistemon that advice from a specialist in cat behaviour would be really helpful in finding the right outcome. I have used one in the past with a complex situation and it was money well spent. Feel free to PM me if you would like a recommendation.

Are they inside cats?

With inside cats I would get more litter trays and that would usually resolve the problem as they will not want to share

I'm assuming the male is neutered?

If he just wants to mark his territory, that's normal cat behaviour with an intruder cat

Otherwise it could be anxiety in which case, something to ease anxiety like feliway would help

Also, lots of rewards for being close to new cat. Associate new cat with positive additions to the "colony"

Killing him is unthinkable as is making him live alone in the laundry room, how cruel
Find the new one a new home The boy was there first and is devoted to your daughter it’s very unfair to think of getting rid of him because a better one has come along !
This hasn’t been thought through at all

Have they both been neutered?

Cat 1 spraying all over the place makes me think he hasn’t been castrated even if cat 2 has been spayed.

Why has it taken two years for this to happen? Did your vet check him over properly the older cat might be ill www.catchat.org/index.php/cat-toilet-spray-indoors?

Just as an afterthought: your daughter has had the second cat for two years now and the peeing / territorial marking with Cat 1 is a recent thing? More likely that something else is at play here in addition to no.1 cat's dislike of the other.

Crossed posts Glorianny

The problem is that cat 1 loathes cat 2 and is now peeing all over the place. Nowhere is safe. He pees on beds, piles of clean washing etc.

Has he just started doing this or has it been ongoing for two years?

If it's a recent development then perhaps it is nothing to do with the other cat.
Perhaps he has a kidney infection? I'd ask for a second opinion from another vet first.

Has this situation been since the kitten moved in 2 years ago or has it just started?

Thanks for your responses. They're pretty much exactly what I've been thinking. The peeing has really increased over time. It almost seems habitual now. He does go outside. There are other cats locally but they seem to be his pals. No problem with them. The vet could only suggest a prolonged CBT style reintroduction but that's just not practical in a busy household with several entrances and exits.
Feliway has been mentioned but we've never had any luck with it. I had a Feliway dispenser thing when introducing two previous cats. Didn't make any difference apart from a greasy spray up the wall.
I thought some of you might suggest that I take him but if he's so stressed by one small female cat I doubt he'd cope with our two giant Maine Coons.
I think rehoming would be best. Poor DD she really loves him but this situation is getting worse. Thanks for your thoughts.

BlueBelle

Killing him is unthinkable as is making him live alone in the laundry room, how cruel
Find the new one a new home The boy was there first and is devoted to your daughter it’s very unfair to think of getting rid of him because a better one has come along !
This hasn’t been thought through at all

I totally agree.
I can’t believe that you even considered killing the cat.
That’s just awful

Of course I didn't consider 'killing him'!! I put it there as a last possible resort. I was trying to consider all possible things she could do. They're getting desperate. He's just peed on the clean pile of clothes out for packing for DGS's first school trip away.

‘Rehome? Euthanise?’

You said it.
That’s the reason why I (and others) mentioned it.

Could you take the second cat and hopefully cat no 1 will stop peeing once he has his territory back? May require retraining to outside/litter box as he now thinks it's acceptable to go anywhere plus the scent markers will tell him that he's used that location to wee. I would suggest removing cat no 2 (to you preferably) steam clean carpets and anything else he's used as a loo, placing multiple litter boxes around the house and make sure he has free access to outdoors. If he does settle down perhaps you could try a gradual reintroduction of cat 2, but be prepared to rehome no 2. Your dd has my sympathies - we've just had to have our beautiful 15 year old Persian pts with stage 4 kidney disease. She had virtually no control left and we had puppy pads and litter trays everywhere. Hope dd can work something out.

Of course you must re-home one of them

It's Cat No. 1's home and he was there first and is devoted to the DD. No way should he be rehomed, and I feel shocked and tearful that euthanasia would even be mentioned let alone considered.

Meanwhile he needs to be checked by the vet as cystitis is very common with stressed male cats, and he is clearly very stressed.

Cat No. 2 needs to be rehomed. She is the new arrival and as you say she is "uncomplicated", she is more likely to settle in a new home, whereas a change of home will finish off Cat No. 1. I feel really sorry for him, bless him. He's showing his distress in the only way he knows how.

Can I please add a caution Aveline?

If she is unwilling to consider some of the very good and humane solutions suggested above, please make sure that if your daughter goes along the rehoming route for either of them, that she considers the pitfalls carefully. Cat rescues everywhere are full to bursting but she should seek advice from someone local to her about finding a safe and loving home. So many times cats are advertised as 'free to a good home' and end up as bait for dog fighting. They use plausible women with convincing stories to obtain cats for this purpose. Its horrific.

I always have x2 cats all my married life always female.
Not one pair has been friends as such, they all have kept a wide berth of each other, occasionally have a punch up but nothing significant.
I have used Feliway, and you can (or could) on Amazon buy" Chill out" Cat collars, worked on one of my Cats who was over grooming with stress.
Good luck

Would it be possible for you to take the 2nd cat for a short stay to see if the situation improves? Depending on what happens make a decision then. How old is first cat, could he have developed a physical problem or illness?