Denied Contact with Grandchildren - August 2012 onwards....

celebgran I can't say anything useful but I do send you a (((hug))) and hope you continue to find strength to carry on.

Thanks Ariadne it all helps when get low just wonder if any point still sending cards and presses been long while 4 years

celeb don't give up ((hugs))

Hi all
Oh so very sorry for you Celebgran,my heart is bleeding too.
When I sent my beloved gc their Xmas cards via my nice D, my other daughter opened read and put them straight back in my nice D bag without showing my gc at all! I got them two Birthday cards, one I sent through the post (my nice daughters 'out' as well now) and the other I am keeping till I see them (fingers crossed)

Tuesday was the first day I have slept all through the night! I woke-up and could actually think about my work with a clear mind, I thought 'thank God, I've got my mind back again' but it was short lived, just until the post arrived. They have got a solicitor (so at least I know they will turn-up this time) But the sol. letter was full of complete lies, the most upsetting thing was, unbelievably, you will never guess....they have changed my little Laila's name! not her first name but her middle and last, which were my first and last name (I don't have a middle one) They have changed it to his grandmothers name which is ugly and doesn't flow nicely with Laila, doesn't suit her and is not from any blood relative of hers, but just her step-dads gm. I'm heart broken again

The sol. mentioned the cards I sent for their birthdays, I had no idea if they would be opened, put straight in the bin or returned, but I did know Laila and Jack would not be shown them, so I wrote for my daughters eyes, saying; 'The day you were born (gc) was one of the most wonderful days of my life'. The sol. said the cards were inappropriately written for them, but they were not written for them to read as they cannot read yet, they are far too young.

So big day this Tuesday 2pm, day of the court hearing, it is going to be traumatic for me, as I will be on my own, and it will be both of them and their solicitor and no-doubt a waiting room full of his family ready to through eggs at me! My nice D couldn't get time off work to come this time, she came last time but wasn't allowed in, I've since heard she could have, as a 'McKenzie friend', I actually think she is frightened to come. Friends offered to come but I don't want a friend to see/hear the nastiness of them and the whole situation.

Oh yoga girl thank you yesterday was grim but hey today we had lovely lunch out with friends and start feel better!

A little girl in ladies about my Mollie age noticed my toe nails painted bless her but I was ok!

Sending you lots lots good wishes and support for next tues please let us know pm me if I can help at all even if just to listen stay strong.

Oh dear poor Celebgran, its so hard isn't it, every where you go you 'see' your little granddaughter/son/daughter, I do all the time. My little Laila used to look at my painted nails and say "pretty nannie"

Glad you had a better day today, I too went out for lunch and had a lovely time, even with one continually talking about her granddaughters, she was the only one I haven't told yet, but as hers are grown, it didn't seem to hurt as much.
Thanks for your good wishes for Tuesday

Sending you love and best wishes for Tuesday .Whatever happens you have been very courageous and it's better than doing nothing.
Our thoughts will be with you all day
Love and hugs

Echo that maniac! Stay strong yoga girl I envy you being able to go through it my oh steadfastly refuses to x

Yoga, my thoughts will be with you tororrow, what a harrowing experience it will be for you. Try to imagine all of us at your side supporting you.

Yogagirl - hope today wasn't too much of a nightmare and that you got the outcome you wanted.

Pleased to come across this website -
lw4sp.org/about/whyastatement/
Womens point of view -but sadly it seems to be based in USA/Canada.but worth a look.

Thinking of you yoga girl do hope you got on ok and things went well please pm me or let us know x

Hello everyone and thank you all very much for your kind words of support.
Well, they turned up at the court with their barrister, he was huge! and very intimidating. They sat in a private office waiting to be called, when the door opened I could see my daughter(from the back) for the first time in months.
Their barrister came out and asked me to go to the back to discuss the case, which I refused, he went away and came back and did the same thing, I said I would only speak in front of the Judge, he handed me their court papers just before we were due to go in, so I had no time to prepare, it was full of complete lies, as per usual.
Cut a long story short, they oppose the application, so I must now file and serve further statements for the contact order hearing. If its granted, the Judge (different one from the first hearing and not as nice, she told me off for saying hello to my daughter!) it will be in the Chelmsford court and will be set for 2hrs, so going from her saying that, it sounds like it will go ahead.
Never goes how you would think, we sat in a line, so I couldn't see my daughter or s-i-l (that is snake-in-law) Their barrister did apologize to the Judge about them not turning up for the first hearing, as they said they didn't know about it and had not received any court papers. I managed to tell the Judge that they did know, as Jason had phoned the courts a week before the first hearing to ask if he had to turn up! so its on the court recorders; finally they know he's a liar!!
Unfortunately I don't have time to prepare the papers, as I'm on a working holiday next week and have to prepare my work for that now, so I've packed it all away where I can't see it, till I get back and can work on it properly, more lost time!
I was very sad when I came out and did think to myself 'shall I go on?' (thinking of the time factor-the GC forgetting me), but all my friends said 'you must, you've got this far'. So I will continue to the end, the end being my seeing my precious GC again, I hope.
So much more to tell, but I have to stop to go to work, so I'll be back on Friday afternoon.

Yogagirl I think you're incredibly brave, and even if things don't go to plan (though I do hope they will) I'm sure that in the future your grandchildren will be thrilled to know what lengths you've gone to in order to maintain a presence in their lives. I salute your perseverance.

I echo ga's comments. I admire you Yoga.

Oh well done yogagirl you are so brave keep going!

Very well done for telling judge about him lying.

I so wish it was me!

Been thinking of you.

I feel such a failure sometimes that my daughter cut me out I waive from that to anger with her sure you know what I mean.

We are all behind you very very well done.

Yogagirl - best wishes in your quest to keep contact with your grandchildren. Going to the family courts is intimidating, the language used, when to sit/stand etc is so unfamiliar to most of us. Have you thought about getting a McKenzie friend to go with you. I used to work in the family courts, and usually found the involvement of McKenzie friends to be positive. I imagine there will be more of these volunteers around in family court matters as the cuts to legal aid come in.

Thinking of you yogagirl any more news? What date is hearing in Chelmsford?

Hello all my gransnet friends
I'm back from a really lovely working holiday, actually managed not to think about things, until I got back on the plane home, and then it really hit me, I closed my eyes and cried, had tears rolling down my cheeks, hope no one noticed, I was facing the window so, sure not.

No I couldn't pack away the papers before I went abroad, I got up at 5am the Friday before, no wee break, and got the papers to the court by midday!
I was really pleased to have done that, as I could then concentrate on my holiday.

The next court hearing is on the 5.8.13, my nice daughters 30th Birthday!
Its now at Southend-on-sea county court, with yet another Judge.
I was feeling despondent with this news, epically as I had a tarot reading on holiday, she was really good, but said I would be disappointed at the court hearing, but that I wouldn't give up.

Good news, they have now no barrister! don't know if an argument ensued after the last court case, when their barrister found out they were lying about not knowing about the first court case, with the barrister apologising to the Judge for their no-show, the barrister left the court saying to my s.i.l "we need to talk in the office" I know my s.i.l would have no respect for the barrister. Or maybe they got a hefty bill and was also asked for a retainer! My tarot reading said the mother is paying, so now a bit of discord between her and my s.i.l (if you believe that sort of thing)

I'm going to try and get the policeman to testify at the court hearing, re; my trying to kidnap little Laila, it will no doubt cost a bit, but so worth it, to see my s.i.l face when the policeman says "no, that's not what happened at all!"

Keep your spirits up as best you can. (A. Hug)

Just looked up the Judge; a 47yr old male, so unless I get a change of Judge, I'm thinking its game over! He is a bit young to be a grandparent, and couldn't find out any more info, whether his married, has children etc.
I think Judges don't put their profiles up to see.

Not necessarily yogagirl am gunning for you so round of how you got this far.
Keep strong I will be praying for you on 5th x x

Meant proud getting tired!

Hello gransnet friends and thank you Celebgran

I've just posted on the 'cut out of their lives' link, which is on the same subject and very sad, same as this link. Shame the links aren't put together!

Some GNs have been helped by FNF (Families need Fathers)
Even if you don't support please read about my son's marathon bike ride on Sunday

www.justgiving.com/Dave-Partington1

Not plugging for sponsors I'm just proud of the way he is dealing with his
despair.