SIL the fridge monster.

Why should lager be in the fridge anyway? it's Winter.Men often rustle around in the fridge looking for a snack, and moving things, is this all it is?it was a rude comment though, even if it is his fridge, when you are doing shopping and cooking.I really don't think I could bear to live with anyone else.

The situation can be fraught with danger, so you may have to tread on eggshells. (I know from limited experience)
Perhaps SIL is, in his own way, asserting his authority over the household, and cannot articulate this. Or perhaps he could in some way be jealous of DD and children paying you attentio and he feels excluded, particularly if you are providing meals? Men are strange creatures (apologies to any reading but you probably think women are strange) and some are less able to handle a diversion of attention from themselves and the fridge is a symbol of his frustration at what he perceives as the lack of control in his life at the moment.

Some men find it difficult to adjust to a first baby and some just don't like their routine interrupted either and can act in a rather immature way as a result.

If you're going to carry on living together in harmony you'll have to reach a compromise somehow.

You can go out and scream later.

I think there might be something in Eloethan's thinking about territorial behaviour. Can I ask, in a nice way, do you choose what meals you cook or do you consult your SiL? Such as asking 'anything you fancy eating this week?'

You probably do this already, but having shared a house with my mother when we were newly married, I wonder if he's not entirely happy with the situation. I know Mr Aka, found it difficult living with his MiL, until such times as they bonded over nice single malt!

Is there any way, perhaps over a couple of his cans of lager, you can get him to talk to you.

Given all the child care you do for him and your DD, glass, it's really churlish of him to make that remark about the fridge being 'his'. It sounds as if he's treating you like a servant which isn't good enough.

Yes, eloethan, a much more sensible and mature answer than mine.

If you generally have a good relationship with SIL then you should be able to sort this out amicably.

Eloethan some good points there, I am going to give them some thought, thank you.

Scream, stamp your feet, kick his arse bum metaphorically speaking. There, better now? Have a nice , I just made one. Now smile.

Do you think he's got a bee in his bonnet about something and is using the fridge thing to try and initiate a "discussion". The comment "because I can, it's my fridge" is a very territorial one (and rather rude) and I wondered if he is trying to establish something regarding his position in the household.

It seems reasonable to me that, as you are primarily the one to do the shopping and cooking, any area relating to food should be largely your domain. Would it be worth asking him if there is any particular reason why he has shifted things around or if there is something else that is bothering him?

If your housing arrangement is a permanent one, I'm not sure if it's a good idea to ignore incidents like this as they might be indicative of simmering resentments which should be addressed before they explode.

Yes!! you can scream in this direction any time

can you hear me screaming from there new

Scream on here, then rise above it

Dont think DD is even aware of it rose, new I am trying but just sometimes I could scream...

glass ignore it, rise above it. It could possibly be a bit of attention seeking. He will get fed up doing it if he gets no reaction

Battle of wills then?
Does it bother DD? If not you may have to grin and bear it.

lona

You could start doing the same with his lager, stick it at the back or underneath something, so each time he looks it's in a different place.
Like in the salad drawer [evil emo] and plead total ignorance......[innocent face]

Thats a good idea rose but his Lager is never moved thats why I cant understand the shuffle.

Can you get plastic boxes for the raw and cooked meats to at least keep them separate (quietly, without a fuss)? Then say," oh, OK, you organise it all how you want, I don't want to interfere", but say it so nicely he won't realise you're being sarcastic.
Or suggest he sticks an old fridge somewhere to put his lager in? Nicely of course!!

Yes it is his mishap we all live together,but I am chief cook and bottle washer, but feel like telling him to put the fridge where the sun dont shine, but I am keeping stum at the moment.

I've just looked at your profile and see that you live with DD and her hubby; and plan to continue to do so when house finished.

You may need to let this quirk float by in the interests of future good relations. Good luck!

Sons-in-law eh!? Mine goes through my fridge and cupboards when he visits and throws our things that are out of date. And he is a food snob par excellence and turns his nose up at much that I cook. I allow all this to flow by me and smile sweetly.

Is it "his fridge"?