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Daughters in Law- in appreciation

(5 Posts)
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GrandmaH Mon 21-Dec-15 11:49:50

I have just been moved to tears reading the thread about the mum whose daughter is making her life hell & cutting her out of her DGD's life.

I have sons so I have DIL.

I just need to make a comment for all those DIL out there who may be reading this & all those of us with DIL. I was very fond of my MIL- she was a totally different person to me but we got on well.
I love both my DIL very much- she & my DS have now separated & it would have been very easy for her to be difficult about access to DGC for us but I am so very lucky as I see them a lot- & I mean A LOT. We don't live very close by but they come & stay a lot- it helps her as she can go out when she wants.

My other DIL lives much nearer & is the most considerate & kind person you could ever wish to meet. I see those children a lot too.
I just want to make the point that it is never going to be a easy relationship- mothers think their sons are perfect- DILs have to live with them!
We tell our own children that we love them but do we ever tell our DIL & SIL?
We are at the mercy of our families to see or not see our DGC- I have friends who are rarely allowed access to theirs & it is heart breaking. Using the children as ammunition is very easy & cruel.
I KNOW I am very lucky indeed & I never take it for granted but this Christmas tell you children's partners that you love them too. I admit I have forgotten to do this recently but I am going to now having read the thread above.

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grannylyn65 Mon 21-Dec-15 11:51:23

Mine knows I love her to bits !!

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M0nica Mon 21-Dec-15 12:08:08

On Gransnet, understandably we hear so much about the problems Gransnetters have with DiL, but I do think, now and again, we should say a word in praise of all the DiL (& MiL) who never get a mention because they have never caused any problems and, to the contrary, are a wonderful addition to our families when they join them.

I would like to say a good word for both DiL and MiL. I had a lovely MiL. DH was an only child, so she could have been a possessive difficulty, but she wasn't. At times I found her easier to confide in than my own mother, kind, supportive and unjudgmental.

As far as DDiL is concerned, I couldn't have better. It still amazes me that someone as nice as her could possible want to be married to DS who, at times, can try the patience of a saint. She is a marvellous and loving mother, far more quiet and patient with the children than I ever was. We share a similar taste in clothes and interests and, when we can, have lovely girly days out, usually including DD.

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mollie Mon 21-Dec-15 16:41:13

My DiL makes my son very happy and is great with my only GD so she certainly gets my vote. They aren't all bad...

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Coolgran65 Mon 21-Dec-15 23:40:03

I have 4 dils and all are great in their own way. Some live close, some are a world away. Quite different personalities. All good mums and hard working. Their ways aren't always our,ways but nothing wrong with their ways.

As pp said, if they can put up with our DSs and they are all happy, then I'm happy.

No-one knows about the future ...... at present I consider myself fortunate.

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