Money's tight

My parents expected us to pay a contribution to the food bill as soon as we got paying jobs, even when those jobs were only student vacation jobs. The expectation neither upset nor surprised us; we regarded it as part of growing up and becoming responsible for yourself, paying your way. I find it strange now that people think it's an odd thing for parents to ask of adult offspring.

We were also expected to help with household chores from an early age. It certainly trains you not to expect to be waited on hand and foot.

I wouldn't ask for money under the circumstances. As quite a few posters have already said, you can make all sorts of tasty economical meals. Sometimes its also cheaper to make double, say make enough of a stew or whatever for six and put half into the freezer for another time. I do this for one and it's cheaper, also nice to sometimes just have to heat something through instead of all the prep. If you can bear with it for a while the situation might improve in time. Don't upset the applecart at this stage when things are going well.

You said your DD fly`s off the handle very easily , this is a form of manipulation ie If you do/say something I don`t like I will shout /flounce off . Just stand your ground and keep your voice low and quiet if she does this , it is hard to keep shouting at someone who remains calm xx

Smithy are things going well though? it seems they are going very well for the DD but not so much for her Mum who is feeling annoyed and resentful about being put upon .

Are free school meals an option? Then a snacky evening meal would be ok.

I think your Daughter should offer to buy the ingredients, I wonder why she hasnt thought of this, or even suggest to give you a contribution,you shouldnt feel bad about this, your Daughter should. Perhaps it just hasnt entered her mind, have a chat and things hopefully will get better for you all.

Am amazed at all the posters who seem shocked at the idea of OP asking for some financial contribution. Daughter is an adult with a child, she most definitely should help, it shouldn't rest in her mothers shoulders to think up ever more economical meals to take up her slack!

nanna58 I too am shocked that posters don't believe OP's DD should contribute financially! I think its perfectly reasonable for DD to pay her way, OP is struggling to make ends meet, how can this be fair?! I can understand your reluctance to broach the subject OP due to circumstances, but this situation appears unsustainable financially.
I think maybe get Christmas over first before you tackle it. I wish I could offer a suggestion, but it's so difficult with your children isn't it?
It is t fair on you though OP, remember that.
Good luck

Ask her to pick up something on the way home- fish and chips or a takeaway. Make her visit their day she brings something home.