Just wondering how I am going to cope with a family celebration for my BIL’s 70th Birthday that his adult children have arranged. It is to be in a hotel some 120 miles from where I live and I will drive by myself to the Venue. But nowadays I find driving quite tiring having reached my mid seventies so I am already a bit strung out in anticipation of the journey, leave alone my main concern as follows:
The problem for me is my niece, my DS younger twin with whom I always had a close relationship. That is, until some years ago when we had a misunderstanding over an innocuous banter remark I made. During the ensuing email discussion she took major umbrage, accused me of emotional blackmail and decided ‘not to talk about it’ when I attempted to ask a few questions.
At the time she had just come to the end of her 10 year commitment to a part-time degree course, she so deserved the First Class Honours that was awarded. I tried apologizing. Tried to engage her in conversation and thought to drive to her home to talk about it. She lives over 100 miles away and her mother, my DS, banned me from doing this. ‘It is not an option’, I was severely told. DS was not prepared to discuss the matter either. Well, here we are five years later – how much time does DN need? I should say that I am a person that talks things through so that although agreement may not be reached at least both parties know from where the other person is coming.
Hence my wobbles about said birthday party for DN’s Dad for which there are less than twenty people invited. Unfortunately I have a bad anxiety problem and have little confidence so am likely to leave the party early if I get too upset. So I am very nervous about seeing my niece. Just to compound it all DS has ‘invited’ me to family lunch the following day. This sister (ten and a half years younger) is rather commanding so I am to do as I am ‘told’.
Fellow Gransnetters, how should I ‘play’ this one? Please?
