Differing retirement ideas!

I think AgeUk have a list of trades people that have been vetted.

I have a similar problem but for a different reason. DH is no longer physically able to do much of the DIY he used to do. I have a list of jobs I hoped he would do in retirement.
When we tried to contact various tradesmen they were either too busy, or failed to turn up when they promised. So it is not an easy solution.

I agree with the other posters, pay someone to help you with cleaning, maintenance etc. Don't feel resentful just resolve the problem to allow you to have some leisure time too.
janeainsworth has a point that you and your husband need to find time for each other as well.

Or maybe he’s just a completely selfish old git janeainsworth maybe if he helped to look after DGS and elderly Mother in law, there would be more time to spend together (assuming of course that he wants to spend time with the OP and not just do his own thing all the time).

Looking after family is not always a choice we can make, it is often a necessity when there’s no one else to do it.

Maybe he thinks you are too busy to spend any time with him?
Presumably it’s your choice to look after your DGS and elderly mother?
There has to be some compromise in retirement if you’re not going to spend your later years just resenting each other.

Why is it that men call it nagging when all you want is a bit of co-operation and (shock horror)... help?
Stop doing all the cleaning, shopping and cooking and get yourself a hobby that takes you out of the house on the days you're not otherwise busy.
When he wends his way back from the allotment/bowling/Oxfam shop and finds no tea ready or a clean shirt waiting to slip into, he might realise the life of Riley is meant for you as well as him

Engage a handyman to do all the jobs, then give DH the bill.

Get someone in to do the repairs/maintenance when he starts getting bills maybe he will start pulling his weight.

Get a cleaner!