Living with someone with strongly opposing political views

I don't care who thinks what, you are both entitled to your own views but I wouldn't be ridiculed in my own home. Tell him to push off and bully someone else.

Like you, Melting, I would find it very difficult to respect someone whose views are so aggressively aired and who feels my own views are worth nothing. It is about the power he is claiming over you, and whether you want to be part of that. It would be goodbye from me before it escalates into real hatred.

As an immigant Im not sure I'll live here long term. We may move to the continent but will hold out for now

I think the reasons an individual is keen on Brexit are very personal and broadreaching and I can understand couples disagreeing and it being an issue

If you've started to dislike him - leave. The relationship you enjoyed is clearly a thing of the past - sad, but you may as well face it.

The arguments are never really about the politics, they are about the relationship. OP needs to think about what is underlying the contempt each of them is showing the other through the medium of 'Brexit'.

Unfortunately the "Yes, dear" and don't argue mindset contributed greatly to generations of downtrodden and even abused partners.
( Not aimed specifically at you * loopyloo!)
Not a situation that many of us would willingly tolerate now.

jamila I think he did tell her his reasons - which led to her answer!

Oh don’t ruin your relationship over Brexit! It will take so long to implement any change to us! Agree to have different opinions but not let them rule your lives!

Sorry, no offence meant but..

Jalima

The woman in the couple I know who split up over Brexit said to him “ now I know you are a w*nker “ when he told her how he had voted.
She sounds as if she is highly articulate - perhaps she couldn't understand his reasoning.

The woman in the couple I know who split up over Brexit said to him “ now I know you are a w*nker “ when he told her how he had voted. So it was the straw that broke the back of that relationship. He did try to make up, but she was adamant she couldn’t live with someone with his views. So for some people it is a definite deal breaker.

Is it only your political views that your partner no longer is willing to respect?

If so, you need either just to stop discussing politics (which I would not be able to do, I may say) or tell him that you have a right to your opinions, as he has the right to his, but that you find his comments difficult to live with. Ask for a politer tone when politics are being discussed and no snide remarks about your views or the newspaper you choose to read.

Take a long hard look at the situation, because if heis suddenly incapable of respecting your political views, you need to ask yourself and him how your relationship is going to continue, and whether he respects your other views (and you his).

If the lack of respect is prevalent in other aspects of your relationship, I feel that now it the time for the pair of you to think very seriously about whether this is a bump in the road that you both can get over, or whether you are going down a dead end.

Sorry to be so pessimistic, but if you are going to break up over this, then it is probably better to do so sooner then later.

Been married 42 years, I do disagree with DH on a lot of things. He is a Trump supporter and much more to the right than I am. He is much more traditional in every respect than I am but somehow we make it work. I tend to say 'Yes Dear' and listen to him then make my own mind up. We both read the Times.

It is interesting to note that more often than not, Brexiteers do not belittle Remainers but that respect is not returned. There are lots of people on here who may find that they might be having to hold their tongue if we leave and do well. As somebody who would love to Remain in the EEC but not be part of a Federal Europe, I find myself with a foot in both camps but even if I weren't, I hope I would respect another human being making the decision with which they felt comfortable providing it wasn't an extreme view.

Honestly! Its no wonder tempers flare.

I’ve noticed that many people who support Brexit are becoming more and more aggressive in their arguments. I think it’s because they know in their hearts that the U.K. has made a big mistake in voting to leave the EU but are too proud to admit that they are in the wrong. I hope, MeltingMacaron, that come the day you are able to hold your tongue and refrain from saying to your partner “I told you so.”

You have my sympathy, but I fear that is all I can offer. I am absolutely not suggesting that you end your relationship. I hope you can make it work, but I know I could never have a partner who had those views, let alone one who ridiculed my opposing views. Political and religious belief reflects a persons view of the world and for me, it’s crucial for my partner and I to hold largely the same philosophy on fairness, compassion, tolerance etc. All of which is expressed through politics.

Your post saying ‘wow’ made me smile mcem
Yes, guests and visitors ( who don’t chainsmoke btw) are welcome to have a cigarette when here with us.
An open window and (when they are gone) a blast of air freshener does the job.
They don’t actually blow smoke in our faces.

FarNorth...you ask me ‘surely there are things you would find unacceptable in a life partner’
Well of course there would be a long list, a career criminal,
A pervert, a womaniser, a liar, a fantasist etc etc.
None of which is the point.
Having a DH who liked a cigarette or voted differently wouldn’t make me love him any less though.

I don't suppose brexit will go ahead or not based on anyone arguing with their friends and family.
I honestly cannot see the point but that is just my opinion.
I wonder if people who have fallen out over it will still consider it to be such a worthy thing on their deathbeds?

Interesting diversity of views in this post and it reminds me once again that for some reason Brexit is a hugely emotional issue. You can argue 'the facts' for ever and still masses of people simply stick to their own viewpoint. I was with some friends of 40 odd years a couple of Sundays back and Brexit was introduced as a subject for an after dinner chat with disasterous results. We are rational intelligent people who were into a vehement argument within ten minutes - and no I didnt keep a cool head - the only ones who did kept silent, which I dont personally agree with. Luckily the OH and I voted the same way (Remain).

I never know my right from my left politically. I'm often asked in surveys but usually go for the "don't know" option. I am not too particularly aware and articles on Brexit I find confusing - for instance I have no knowledge about hard and soft Brexits.
I voted to leave and I haven't changed my mind - I just wish they'd get a move on, get agreements for what benefits US and get out!

Surely one chooses a partner because you like that person and that must include the beliefs and values s/he has - if it’s becoming clear that you don’t share these then what basis is your relationship founded upon?

I could no more live with a smoker than I could a Brexit supporter.
Both are anti social traits.