Husband wants to use viagra

Would you be more hurt if he just turned away from you and no longer wanted to have sex.?

My ex partner would take a little blue pill (or even just half) because he said he didn’t want to “let me down”. I know he used to worry about “keeping up with me” and it was all about his self confidence. Please make sure your hubby has a proper health check before taking V, either with his GP or a pharmacist - just be on the safe side. I would be worried about buying any sort of medication over the internet. These days, a man over a certain age can get V from the doctor free (that rhymes!!). Good luck - and make the most of it ?

Please be careful when considering Viagra. It can cause heart problems. I know of a friend’s husband who recently needed up in hospital due to taking it!

I hope he used a reputable company. I would be very wary of any medicines of any type bought online.....

Boots sell viagra now over the counter,i hope you can resolves this problem, men do find it difficult sometimes talking about sex if things dont feel right,

My feeling is that he just needs reassurance & extra love at this tricky transitional stage. I think this is why he confessed to you. I think if you accept the situation positively, he will open up and discuss it & then you can suggest buying at Boots or going to get a prescription. Good luck

How easy was talking about emotional issues, sex included, with your husband before this happened? I get the feeling he belongs to the majority that finds it very hard indeed!

It sounds to me as if the poor man either thinks he has difficulties with his erections or is afraid he can't keep up with you and not that he is dissatisfied with you.

Now is probably not the right moment to try and discuss the matter with him, as you both seem to have got off on the wrong foot.

Let him try Viagra, but do go out and buy yourself some nice new underwear (to suit his tastes rather than yours, if the two aren't the same) or a pair of high heeled shoes from the nearest charity shop - whatever you know will probably make Viagra quite unnecessary.

I would take a bath, slip on the new undies and heels and then parade in front of my DH on the way to the bedroom - it usually works a treat!

I would be more concerned about the health implications of taking a drug without his GP giving him the once-over.
Viagra is another name for Sildenafil which is use to treat Pulmonary hypertension.

All I would say about your OH using viagra would be to purchase it from a pharmacy rather than on line as a lot of the sorces are very questionable and some are not genuine.
He should have a check up from his Dr. before using the tablets for his own peace of mind.

No need to pay silly money on the internet. Viagra's patent has no expired and it's cheap Ask your GP for a prescription.
He feels he'd like to be stiffer for longer. It's no reflection on your desirability or technique.

Grannythree. Would you consider taking half a tablet yourself? You might be surprised!

In this day and age there is sex wherever you look - newspaper articles, tv etc it is easy for anyone, let alone a newly retired man, to feel he is missing out. He was open with you about it, and his motive might be to give you more pleasure as much as himself - perhaps he doesn’t want to let you down. What is there not to like and appreciate in that? Are you afraid he will be demanding sex 24/7?

As I understand it, it has to be taken about an hour before? So presumably he will only take it when he is expecting sex to happen - this is why it is important for you to be able to communicate about it - he will not want to have to go and sort himself out if you turn your back on him. I think you need to lighten up and treat it as a joint experiment.

At the same time, can you take the time to go for walks or some other physical activity with him? Maybe join a walking group. Once he is established in it and made some friends, you could gradually drop out if you want to. Alternatively, could he take a turn at looking after grandchildren? . Sixty three is young to retire, he may find it difficult to find other men his own age. Could he volunteer for something?

My husband takes Cialis, because he has been diabetic most of his life (type 1) and as he got older it became more difficult to maintain an erection. Before he realised there was a problem, I thought he no longer interested in me.

It was upsetting for him, and he is very happy now.

He went to see our GP for advice first, who prescribes it on a regular basis.

Don't be upset about it, and be aware this is a very personal thing for him to talk about - even to you.

Accept that he feels the need to take a medical aid, and is also still keen to maintain a sexual relationship with you.

Some men wouldn't bother about their wives' feelings, wants or needs and just give up.

Eglantine21 do you know for certain that it’s possible for a woman to take half a tablet? My husband has some Viagra but it gives him a migraine so they aren’t used and I could definitely do with something to give me some sexual interest!

Viagra only works if there is stimulation and by that, I mean some kind of foreplay which he recognises as the precurser to the act, not just a kiss as he passes you in the kitchen.
If you are not a willing partner and don't give those signals then (as they say in America) he won't get wood.
One of the 'downsides' for some women is the fact that Viagra helps maintain an erection for far longer, which ultimately may make the woman sore and wish it was over with.

Most of my friends in my age group (65) have husbands/partners that have been taking Viagara for some time. I have just persuaded my husband to do the same. A lot of men find it difficult to talk about. I’m sure he was just too embarrassed to tell you.

I certainly wouldn't feel the need to parade like a playboy ho in VS lingerie and heels in order to 'satisfy' my OHs waning sex drive.
I ask you, do men diet, attend to their skin and personal hygiene, take great care over their choice of clothes, spend hours (and moolah) at the hairdressers, and having manicures, as much as women do? Do women ask their men to undergo a hollywood, brazillian and/or other waxing?
Do women linger at men's underwear racks fingering the goods and fantasising 'Will he look good in these?'
It's all pandering to men's 'needs' or so they would have us believe, whilst the majority of over 50s do Jack S*

Umm, Luckylegs, it has the same effect on the female equivalent of the penis, the clitorus, in increasing blood supply.

What you then do with that is up to you!!

Gabriella so true!!!

You are making a fuss for nothing.

Thank you Eglantine that’s what I supposed but I didn’t think it would be good for you. I suppose I’d better check it won’t affect my other medicines etc.

I'm wondering if perhaps you've gone off sex a bit and that's why you reacted the way you did. However, if that's not the case, could you perhaps start a conversation by saying that you've given it some more thought, and are sorry for reacting the way you did. Then suggest that you're happy to give it a try, but maybe get himself checked out by the GP first to ensure that it won't do any harm etc.

Once he's done that, if things are still difficult in the conversation department, next time you feel a bit sexy why not whisper in his ear, 'darling why don't you go and pop one of those little blue pills'? That way it will bring the subject up ('scuse the pun), get you both going, and then afterward, perhaps you can discuss how well it worked for both of you, but of course most importantly him.

Hope you can sort it out for both your sakes.

I’m sorry if this post offends, but the health stuff I wanted to mention has already been discussed except in one respect.

A commonly reported side effect of Viagra is difficulty in achieving ejaculation, plus a need for more powerful stimulation.

The partners of older men using it often report that as a result, sex can last much longer, be rougher, and they dry out and become painful.

This isn’t exactly a positive thing. As women age, their vaginal tissues dry out and become more fragile, making them easier to injure.

I have had the exact sort of injury on an ongoing basis before and it’s quite awful. It will also drive you to avoid sex as much as possible which will simply make matters with husband worse.

I would strongly suggest, as a result, that you start looking at some of the better known intimacy stores online and pick up a good quality lubricant for yourself.

I’m sorry if this seems overly forward, but pain during sex is a common problem for women and most sufferers are extremely reluctant to disclose it.

The online stores (lovehoney, etc) have a wide selection with reviews to help you choose, and they use entirely discreet packaging. No one will know about your helpful product except perhaps your husband if you choose to tell him at the time.

Please don’t get hurt trying to meet your husband’s wishes. That will only make things worse. A little bit of help will not go amiss.

Good post muffinthemoo.
And that's why many of us need Vagifem.

I would be interested in knowing what he is doing in this spare time. Do you know for sure that he isn’t seeing someone else— or thinking about it.