Ignored when feeling ill

He was probably tired and half asleep at that time.

Thanks Anja.

My husband was just the same until recently. I think, now I'm a bit older, he likes to check I'm not actually dying.

Although for all the coughing and moaning that went on last night (from me) I could well have been, and he said nothing.

Oh dear Gonegirl how does he ignore you coughing loudly?
I can't ignore my husband if he's not feeling good. But I suppose you cant expect your partner to act as you would.
I do feel though if I am ever seriously ill during the night I won't have any help. ?
I hope you're feeling all right this morning? Take it easy..

It sounds as if you were coping really well with your nausea and panic, annep1. Your husband did what you asked him to do by "coming in beside you". That's not ignoring. Later, if he was awake and aware of everything, he may have felt there was nothing he could do to help. He may even have thought he'd be in the way if he interrupted. He said he was glad you were feeling better by morning. What else did you expect him to do?

I do hope you two ladies are feeling better now ?
My OH always shows concern if I am off colour he always has done, even down to the fact that I may not have had enough sleep when the ACs where small.

I think for something like nausea there is no point in both of you having a disturbed night..

Probably I'm quite selfish, but what can someone else do about it?

If you are seriously ill during the night, you will make it quite obvious to him, I am sure. Nausea isn't a serious medical situation, and you seem to know how to avert the subsequent panic attack.

You felt guilty about disturbing him - maybe he felt that you were coping well, and once you were in the other room that he would be disturbing you if he followed you. Perhaps also he wondered why you were staying away from him after asking him to keep you company?

Do you take these nauseous turns often? If you find them worrying and long for company and support, it would be a good idea to sleep in the same room all the time, then he would be on hand all the time.

If I have to rush to the bathroom more than four times in an hour, I will get the comment in the morning 'you were up a lot last night, are you okay?' but nothing at the time - but then there is nothing he could do.

On the occasion I got up too quickly, passed out and hit the floor with a thump, he did get out of bed that time!

Miserable as such a situation is, it's a darn sight worse for all those of us who are on our own if we happen to feel seedy.

Baggs in answer to your question I thought he might stay awake a while to see if I was ok. I have had about 4/5 episodes in last 5 years when my BP dropped very sharply.
But I get your point. That is quite possibly how my husband was thinking. And I was pleased I was able to control the attack myself.
We can't sleep together, health problems- not serious but disturbs sleep.
The consensus seems to be I am a bit sensitive. So thanks for comments.

Actually annep1 he's very good. I know my coughing (reflux cough) must disturb him but he doesn't complain. And I guess he knows there is nothing to be done.

EllenVannin I get what you're saying. At least you can search for painkillers and make as much noise as you want. But seriously I know its not nice to be alone when you're ill.

Thats good Gonegirl . Obviously picked you up wrong. My husband is good too - just not during the night. He used to get angry if I made even a little noise when he was sleeping or put the light on. I am generally patient.

I’m not excusing his behaviour but my DH sleeps like a hibernating bear and if I wake him up for any reason he’s only half there and drops off again almost immediately.

If one of us is coughing or sneezing they get banished to the spare room!
annep1 I hope you're feeling better now, perhaps he thought when you went to the other room that you wanted to be undisturbed.

I certainly woke my DH up last night as I turned over and got cramp in my leg and got out of bed to flex the leg, shouting 'Well, that was a rude awakening' which of course woke him too!
He turned over and went back to sleep.

Thanks Jalima. A rude awakening indeed!
It seems that most men are literally "dead to the world " at night.

He did mutter 'You all right?'
Then reminded me to take some magnesium tablets this morning

Well that is very thoughtful Jalima.

Yes Ellan and have you noticed that nobody cares a 'darn' here either ?

What do you mean crazyH?

If you wake during the night in pain and obviously ill, you are perfectly justified in waking your partner and asking them to get the doctor. However, a nausea attack is not life-threatening and I think it's selfish to wake someone when you know there is nothing they can do.

And telling you that does not mean that "No-one cares a darn", so don't let crazyH's post get to you.