Neighbors take us as suckers!!!!!

And apparently the horse lost !

Pampas grass and pineapples...well you learn summat new all the time with GN.

This conversation has been so nice and funny! Just right for a Monday. Thanks everyone - oh and good luck with fending the neighbours off!

Our neighbours pampas grass took a severe battering in the recent gales. It looks quite tatty and bent over. Does this have any effect on the inhabitants, I wonder?

We have a neighbour who only seems to remember we live next door when it suits her. About a year ago she knocked on our door to ask if she could use our shower. The only shower we have is a tiny one in our ensuite, so it meant she had to go through our bedroom to get to it. I didn't mind that so much as I was sure I could trust her. However when she eventually came downstairs having showered and washed her hair she pointed out to me that our shower didn't drain quickly enough and was difficult to use because of that. When I went upstairs afterwards she hadn't even cleaned up after using it.
A year on we have a new shower and have also had a water softener installed so we can now enjoy lovely showers with soft water and very little cleaning afterwards. Of course I don't intend to mention that to her!

Some people really do have the cheek of the devil! My neighbour thought it was ok to use my outside tap to jetwash their patio when I was out. They actually boasted that it took four hours - and I'm on a meter! The next time I went to use it I discovered they had broken the hosepipe fittings on it. When they wanted to jetwash something else I was in, so they said 'It's ok to use the tap isn't it?' THE tap - not MY tap! This time I said no and mentioned the broken fittings. They seemed quite shocked and put out, but I was the one that was cringing with embarrassment at saying no. It's not easy standing up to these cheeky people, is it?

We give a wide berth to our neighbours after they started to take us for granted. My dh helped paint their house - while the husband sat upstairs on his computer.

The final straw came when both houses needed the guttering cleaned. Him next door suggested we get them looked at the same time; we were out when the men came so when I went 'round to see how much we owed, they just gave me the business card and told me to arrange a visit myself - but could dh see his way to cleaning out a drain that had been missed!! Err, no.

Because of my disabilities one of my neighbours, in his 40's is a named person for driving my car and he used to borrow it occasionally but I got fairly fed up because after months of borrowing he worked on the assumption that my car ran on fresh air and he was really put out when I asked him for money towards running it. He has not asked since.

My neighbour rang me from her place of work and asked me to put a note on her front door addressed to the postman. Could I write on the note she said, please leave all parcels with my next door neighbour in future - that was me! never been asked do you mind etc.,

My goodness I learn something every time I log onto GN. Was going to get a pampas grass but won't bother now.

By the way does anyone know if my daffies in the window are a signal for something?

Do you mean like Pampas grass in the front garden?

Lovely response from you all after telling of our swinger neighbors who used our hoover. We did get the hoover back and we are not going to let them use it again. We do hear a lot of buzzing from next door especially at weekends not sure if it’s a hoover or something else.

I blame 50 Shades of Grey...

That comment was in reply to Sussexborn's comment about the pampas grass being battered!

Over the years I have sadly had to come to the conclusion that I am not going to loan anything at all other than to immediate family members. I have had a hot air paint stripper returned broken, with simply 'Sorry - it burned out - I can't afford to buy you another one otherwise I wouldn't have needed to borrow yours' Faultless logic which left me speechless. A carpet shampooer returned with the handle snapped 'You can probably still manage to use it like that!' A steam cleaner - one of the more expensive models - was returned with absolutely filthy, stinking brushes. Although the borrower said she wanted it for her hall carpet, I discovered that she owned flats and was using it to clean all the muck and horrors left by a very dirty tenant. I've loaned books, records, even clothes that never came back, or were certainly not in the condition I loaned them. Never, ever again - if asked now I simply say that I use the item constantly, or that I no longer have it!!

I certainly wouldnt be lending her anything else after that!

Sadly, there are a lot of folk who take a mile if given an inch! Most of us don't want bad feelings between neighbours, so tend to be a bit soft.
Maybe setting the ground rules at the start is one approach - eg " I don't normally lend things to neighbours as we had a bad experience at our old house when a neighbour broke our mower and we couldn't afford to replace it. So - yes, you can borrow X if it can't wait till you get a new one, but please be very careful with it and I will need it back by Tuesday evening." Then put a stop to borrowing etc if they break the rules or ask too often.
A relative of mine was caught in this sort of situation - neighbour ended up coming in without knocking and borrowing all sorts of things, and even got very long term loan of car but didn't pay for new tyres or servicing when needed..

flipping cheek i like my room hoovered everyday

I had a ladder which I could no longer use but one neighbour, in particular, borrowed it very frequently and he had the cheek to lend it to another. When I eventually retrieved it I sold it and that sorted that out that problem. Give an inch and some take a mile.

Well, I have certainly learned today from you lovely ladies! Gosh, not too sure what I would ever do with this new information

I’m new to gransnet - a few of these comments have had me chuckling, but I can’t believe the cheek of your neighbours. (I have to say I must have had a sheltered life - I didn’t know the significance of pampas grass!! .) We lent our lawnmower to a neighbour and when we got it back he had caught the cable with the blade halfway down - didn’t mention that when he gave us it back and certainly didn’t apologise. We lent a stepladder to a friend and it came back with a bent top. Again no apologies. Lesson learned - neither a borrower nor a lender be!

If I plant tall swaying bamboo will anyone mistake it for pampas grass with its hidden message?

I once had a cheeky neighbour extract tins of paint from my shed and he used it to do a painting job he got paid for. Some people.

Glad you got the vacuum back. My dad's neighbour asked to borrow his step ladders for a couple of days. Two weeks later, he was still waiting! I went round there and asked for it to be returned. He looked at me and said, "but I need those!" Another week passed and no sign of the ladders. I sent my husband round, they were returned straight away with a sour face!

I do not understand why people are afraid to say, 'No', if they don't want to loan anything out or do anything. It's one word. No reason needs to be given.

When a supposed ( ex) friend came round to my first new marital home, which I had saved hard for and was very proud of, she said, Can I comment on a..... particular piece of furniture. I just said, 'No'. The look on her face was priceless and she never spoke to me again. No great loss to me if that was her attitude.