Alarm Bells Ringing?

Be there for her but be very careful what you say about him / the situation. e.g my DS and partner separated, my ex DH told DS he was pleased as he never liked her. DS and partner are now back together - things are a bit tricky between DS and exDH!!

"and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee" en.wikisource.org/wiki/Meditation_XVII

Having been in a similar position (for much too long) - and now happily divorced and completely rid of the serial adulterer to whom I was married for a long time - I’d advise getting legal advice as soon as possible (like NOW) and freezing any joint accounts so he can’t access (and possibly empty) them. Talking didn’t work with my ex, he was hell bent on going his own way and pleasing himself. I’m about to move into my own home (exchanged contracts this week) and am so looking forward to having it exactly as I want. Support from friends and family is crucial for anyone going through this sort of situation.

startingover61 well done, the only way is up! Best wishes for your new life...never look back X

Thank you, Solitaire! I finally learned that life’s too short and leopards don’t change their spots! Onwards and upwards!

MYOB

BYO

Protect the marital finances. Ask your friend to see a solicitor. Most will offer a free half hour .

Are we talking about Best Friend's DH or yours, CamJ?

Either way, it sounds like a bit more than alarm bells should be involved.

As CamJ is a new poster who hasn’t come back to elaborate do you realise we are probably all talking to ourselves??

Thank you Grans for all those helpful and supportive messages.
Yes many have read between the lines correctly. I have been through every emotion known to woman this week and am totally alone. If there was a senor railcard to use to go to hell and back I would have saved a bit of money this week - sorry I don't do emojis.
I can't give you any more details for fear of recognition but every day gets worse than the last. God help me and anyone else in this situation.

Grans please read my latest post to thank you.

Been there......awful time for you. Forget the emotions, get practical and above all, make sure you have every detail of your joint finances and if he has any accounts in his solo name, make sure he declares them. Tears can blind your vision.....no time for tears - you can do that once your finances are sorted. Good luck

That's terrible, CamJ.
Get some advice from a solicitor, or from Citizens' Advice, to protect yourself.