Gransnet forums

Relationships

going it alone

(33 Posts)
FlexibleFriend Mon 05-Aug-19 11:02:16

Divorce is expensive especially if he's not interested but oh so worth it.

glammanana Mon 05-Aug-19 10:59:19

Get that free advice from a Solicitor and get your finances in order,you are only young and have possibly 30+ yrs do you really want to waste it being miserable when you can make something on your own much more pleasureable.

sodapop Mon 05-Aug-19 10:50:08

Yes get some legal advice Sophie22
I agree with Bluebelle completely.

BlueBelle Mon 05-Aug-19 10:07:23

Oh may I say living alone is a bed of roses compared to a bad partnership Yes there are times you feel lonely but that is made up for a 100 fold with hobbies, friends, just doing stuff
I think there is also a difference if it’s your choice if a husband leaves you through infidelity or even illness or death it’s much harder to adjust to

wildswan16 Mon 05-Aug-19 09:54:02

Certainly try to get a "free" legal advice session in your area. Also, you are able to go to an organisation like Relate - who are happy to counsel individuals as well as couples. Maybe talking it through with a counsellor would help you see the way forward and give you some support.

It seems a very daunting prospect before you start divorce proceedings but the outcome may be the right one for you.

Daisymae Mon 05-Aug-19 09:38:21

It doesn't sound as if you are getting much out of this relationship. I wonder if you have any family members that you could confide in? While living alone may not be a bed of roses it could be a better alternative. You seem to have discussed separation already, so things are serious. I would suggest seeking legal advice to see where you stand. Selling the house may not be up to him. Perhaps also you should reconsider your sleeping arrangements.

Liz46 Mon 05-Aug-19 09:36:10

You should be able to have a free initial session with a solicitor. Meanwhile make sure you know all about the joint finances. I was divorced when I was 46, after 25 years of marriage and was very happy in my own little house. If I felt a bit lonely, say on a Sunday, I would just go to a yoga class and then have a swim.

By accident I met my second husband quite quickly (probably because the last thing I wanted was another man) and we have been together for about 28 years now, married for over 25 and are very happy together. Good luck.

Sophie22 Mon 05-Aug-19 09:31:27

good morning i have been with my husband for 19 years and things was good at the start but over the last year things have gone down hill we just cant seem to get on and have different views what we want from life. i am 63 he is 56 he is a very boring person and never wants to do anything with me i cant remember the last time he took me out but he can go out with his friends now and again i feel im just here to cook and clean and just to look after him i feel like stopping sleeping with him as i feel that is all he wants from me , i have said about going seperate ways but refuses to put our house up for sell or even discuss it he never likes anything i do and feel at a loss and have been put on Antidepressants by my doctor any advice would hep.