Annoyed

Hi Narnia are you new?

It’s half term. ... a dental appointment might be hard to get right now but perhaps make a phone call next week.

janeainsworth, I felt your observations re smelly breath and subsequent post were spot on. As soon as I read the post, I thought "gum disease". And yes, abscesses can poison your whole system...and if it's that bad, could easily be fatal. People don't realise what an impact our oral hygiene has on us...and our relationships!
The antibiotic course he was prescribed should have been a warning signal, and should in an ideal world have been followed up by a decent dentist.

urmstongran you took the words right out of my mouth

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Some years back when I was suffering from gall bladder problems, my husband very tactfully told me I had bad breath problems, so there could be other underlying causes for your partner's symptoms. So as others have suggested, a doctor's appointment might be appropriate as well.

Does it matter why he is doing something about it. You can be sure he was not up to anything, nobody would start an affair with someone with bad breath.

I would never refuse the offer of a mint or gum in case it is a hint that I smell.

Please get him to go to a doctor ! Back in 2004 my husband developed bad breath and as it turned out the doctor sent him ti a specialist who diagnosed him with crohns/ colitis.

He might be thinking of an affair though.

I am sorry OP I can't think of any other reason. Is he showing any sign of wanting to come back into your shared bedroom?
In which case it is you he is missing

I think the OP is at a loss as to why he ignored her complaints when they were sharing a bed, but now he's in the spare room he's started to brush his teeth/use mouth wash. Yes, perhaps he's doing it to get out of the spare room, but there's also the matter of ignoring your partner's complaints - I'm assuming that it put a stop to kissing, and anything-else in that department? (Could that have been part of the reason he resisted better dental hygiene). Personally, I think his attitude speaks volumes about other things that are going on in your marriage, and they need to be addressed. Perhaps the lack of dental hygiene is more a symptom than a cause?

He needs to go to a dentist, quickly. If he has periodontal disease or problems with fillings or lack of they need attention. Untreated gum disease can lead to other health problems. Has no one at work tried to address his halitosis? They should, just as body odour is addressed if other staff are finding it offensive.

I would not be impressed by him trying now, now that they are in separate rooms. If he had cared enough he would have listened earlier. I would be extremely annoyed and it would be too late!!
Not doing as asked was taking childish stubbornness too far.

My husband developed bad breath and I used to comment on it when he breathed in my direction. Turned out he had oesophageal cancer! After treatment his breath is fine again. Definitely get checked.

It sounds to me that you have finally done something that has made him realise what the problem is.

I would assume that he is cleaning his teeth at night now, because like most men he dislikes sleeping alone and would like to come back in to your bed.

So now would be the time to consider whether you want him there or not.

It seems to me that this man cares very little for his personal hygiene, his health and his marriage. "You are what you eat" so if he is eating a very high fat diet consisting of lots of meat he is not going to portray a picture of health is he? The thing is, where did the eating habits start? Do they both eat like that? Does the OP eat that way?

If he was my OH I would have tried long ago to change his diet for his own sake.

The fact that he has now started cleaning his teeth after moving into the spare room says more about the marriage than poor personal hygiene issues.

I can’t understand why he doesn’t smell it himself. Therefore apart from visiting the dentist. A trip to the Doctor wouldn’t go a miss. Why would he not do anything before you moved room? Maybe underlying depression. Not caring about yourself is a sign? Just a thought.

As a retired Dental Hygienist I would advise he sees a dentist or go directly to a hygienist. Chronic gum disease gives off the most appalling smell. Also as other people have said stomach problems will case hallitosis

There is a toothpaste and mouthwash called 'Therabreath' which is brilliant - a little expensive but works wonderfully and very, very quickly. You can get it at Boots.

You said numerous times you were splitting up. May be he’s scared of you going and he will be lost without you. So he decided to do something about his breath so you won’t leave he may not show he cares but if your in separate rooms he’s probably worried you will go.

My guesses are that someone else has said something (work?), or he is trying to impress someone (the OP or someone else) or that it is due to gum/teeth issues and hes trying to do a self cure (or has been to the dentist).

My dh is dentist phobic. An sudden increase in brushing, the arrival of various products usually means hes got problems!!

Riggie that has crossed my mind too!
I don't follow the same diet, it's vile.
He's seen a Dr and a dentist. The problem seemed to settle after the antibiotics, but even so id have still se
wanted him to clean his teeth as the food he eats from cleaning them in the morning to going to bed are fatty, meaty, strong cheese coffee etc.
I'm going to address it again tonight after work.

If his breath is this bad there is more afoot.
Please please have him see a doctor ASAP

My other half had bad breath and also smokes.
He brushes his teeth, but only for a few seconds at night.
Not enough.
He can’t afford dentists fees, which is a shame.
I think that’s what puts people of going to see dentists.

I cant imagine anyone going to bed without cleaning their teeth, imagine the bacteria building up during the night!He needs to see a Dentist and Doctor as soon as possible before other things set in, for instance heart disease.
I feel sorry for the people around him at work having to put up with that.Imagine if he is in the health service and having near contact with ill people, that would be awful.

I think he may have actually been worried that something is wrong with him and did the classic head in sand that unfortunately quite a lot of men do in such situations. He may now be trying to solve the problem by brushing etc, still fearful of what the actual cause is, yet possibly still reluctant to admit the possibility of something more serious existing. He sounds frustrating! However, if you have the will to get your relationship back on track with him, you may have to encourage him, much as one would a reluctant child, to go and seek advice from both GP and dentist. My brother has a phobia of both, so with great gaps in his teeth and obvious health problems he avoids visiting anyone who may help. At least I don't have to live with him... Such phobias and certainly the fear of the unknown is not uncommon, especially among men.

There could be many reasons why he has halitosis. It could be a dental problem, it could be one of a few medical issues.
I would suggest a dentist and hygienist and a trip to the GP. No one can diagnose on here.
As to why he's now suddenly cleaning his teeth at night - maybe he wants to be back in the marital bed and is finally making an effort as previously asked to do so. He needed a wake-up call.