When my partner of 22 years passed away year last October, I took it very bad and hit rock bottom , then to make matters worse , my daughter had a big fall out with me few weeks after the funeral , mainly because of how I’d felt the way my partners son treated his dad which , to me , was unforgivable, but my daughter thought his son was wonderful and disliked my attitude towards him . All this couldn’t have come at a worse time as I was already suffering the most awful grief .
I did try, so many times , to say I’m sorry to my daughter, to tell her that I loved her and missed her so very much ,but she stood her ground . The year has gone by with absolutely no contact from her whatsoever, ignoring Mothers Day , my birthday and , worst of all , this past Christmas.
But , as time has gone by , I have become to feel that I don’t like my daughter anymore, don’t like her for what she has done to me , kicked me down when I was already down with grief , my own mam and dad would be mortified by her actions if they were still alive , as this behaviour isn’t really acceptable in the family I grew up in . Sounds awful I know , but her behaviour has not only affected myself but the wider family also , including her brother.
All I can say is to give your daughter the space to grieve and let her come around in her own way , let her own consciousness prick . I’ve read so many stories of estrangement on here and through friends , I find it so hard to understand how the babies we gave birth to , whom we cuddled, loved and cherished, gave them our all and our very our best, , can then hurt their mothers so badly . All I know is that I could never , ever treat my own mother in such a way as it would break my own heart in doing so .