Grandma jealousy

Crikey - you expect a three year old to give you equal time and attention? This is a 'problem' of your own making. My grandchildren interact a lot with me - when I'm babysitting. In a family gathering situation, though, they're far too busy playing together and pestering their aunts, uncles and parents. I watch from a distance and provide refreshments!

it is ok and normal to feel irrationally jealous or upset or something - how you feel is how you feel even if you know it is irrational.

To not be able to rationalise it or realise it is your problem, not the other person (especially a 3 year old person!) is not normal though
and behaving in an angry or upset manner over it is only going to alienate you from other family members who, quite rightly, will see such behaviour as unreasonable.

if you cant get on top of this by yourself would counselling help?

Not to change the 3 year old or anyone else - but to help you cope with what after all is a non problem unless you make it one.

Your granddaughter is 3 years old.

I think you should not get so upset over the actions of a very little girl.