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Do bullies get karma?

(46 Posts)
Knittingnovice Fri 29-Apr-22 21:32:37

Hi, I've been bullied and know people who have been. There is a real impact on self confidence and victims move on, albeit slowly, to better things having suffered.

What happens to the bullies? Do they ever learn and grow or do they stay in the same pattern? Does karma, perhaps not the right word, ever happen to them? They seem to have support

LucyLocket55 Fri 29-Apr-22 21:49:24

I really and sincerely hope so

Blossoming Fri 29-Apr-22 21:52:19

I was the victim of a workplace bully early on in my working life. I went on to bigger and better things, she is a sad lonely person as she alienated so many people.

MissAdventure Fri 29-Apr-22 22:04:29

I like to think that being a bully is, in itself, a form of punishment.
They have to take a long hard look at themselves at some point...

Knittingnovice Fri 29-Apr-22 22:08:58

Thanks for getting back to me.

Bullies aren't just in workplace and they seem to have people around them to enable them if that makes sense.

I've stood up to bullies, there have been consequences, but I think it leads me to better things.

I've always wondered about bullies, they may be sad and lonely, but seem to be around people?

MissAdventure Fri 29-Apr-22 22:12:05

I think people, despite themselves, are attracted to those who seem powerful.
All good if the power is used in a good way, but it can draw people in to people who are less than kindly intentioned.

CanadianGran Fri 29-Apr-22 22:13:00

The ones I have encountered are so narcissistic that the realization will never come to them that they are in the wrong.

It would be nice to think they get their comeuppance, but for the most part I think they just go on without a care.

Namsnanny Fri 29-Apr-22 22:14:15

I dont think so No. Not the really destructive kind.

Maybe someone going through a bad patch and taking out on another, possibly.

But in my experience it's as much a part of their character as their hair colour is part of their dna.

The kind of self realisation needed to change this behaviour takes a lot of hard work.

VioletSky Fri 29-Apr-22 22:20:57

I think that if the only joy you get out of life is hurting others, when their victims walk away they are probably more often misersble than not.

Nothing hurts a bully more than being ignored

MissAdventure Fri 29-Apr-22 22:22:33

There was a thread here ages ago, and the world of hurt that people had been put through was almost palpable, years after the events.

It would be nice to think justice is meted out, somehow.

MissAdventure Fri 29-Apr-22 22:25:17

I think bullies often just waltz off and find another victim, because the "who" isnt as important to them as the opportunity to feel superior to someone/anyone.

Starrynight49 Sat 30-Apr-22 07:28:53

No, I don't believe in Karma . It would be nice to think that all the bad people get their just deserts, but in reality they don't. They just move on and bully other people, and they always think their actions are the right ones.

Charleygirl5 Sat 30-Apr-22 08:22:53

My boss was a real bully and once I stood up to her. She was really shocked and sulked for the rest of the day but it did not stop her.

She died in her early 60's but I do not think she had a happy life, drinking and smoking herself to death and also fairly lonely.

Katie59 Sat 30-Apr-22 08:37:21

There is a fine line between bullying and leadership, you might accept robust criticism from a superior who you admire, works hard and tries to help. The same criticism from someone you dislike or despise gets a completely different reaction.

At work this week we have managers who are good, others are lazy, bossy and just do the absolute minimum, thankfully the senior managers are all very good so that makes it a nice place to work.

tiredoldwoman Sat 30-Apr-22 09:04:18

Absolutely. I've been on the being bullied side but witnessed karma coming to them later on in life . I felt upset for them .

foxie48 Sat 30-Apr-22 09:15:47

I think bullying and leadership have nothing in common although some people can resort to bullying because they lack leadership skills. I think you can always help people become better leaders/managers with good training but a bully can be difficult to change. Do they get Karma? No, I don't think so. The only person I've worked for who was a bully (passive-aggressive type, so v tricky to deal with) was made a director and I moved to another company, where thankfully, I enjoyed the remainder of my working life.

Knittingnovice Sat 30-Apr-22 09:18:27

Thanks everyone. I think karma may be the wrong word. I'd like to think they can learn from their actions and improve, rather than carrying on and causing more upset to others.

Kate1949 Sat 30-Apr-22 09:45:36

I was bullied at work in my 50s. This was an organisation where I had been for well over 25 years. I was going along quite happily then I was moved to another department where no one knew me.
A woman there took an instant dislike to me. She treated me appallingly. I eventually went to the boss who this woman was as thick as thieves with. He said 'We never had a problem until you came'. It was horrendous.
She did get Karma and I was glad.

timetogo2016 Sat 30-Apr-22 09:56:15

I knew a child who was a vile bully in school,the parents didn`t take any notice.
Years later that child had a child of his own and he was bullied at school,the parents were upset and furious whilst telling me.
Well i said , what goes around comes around,now you know how so and so felt when your son and i pointed to the now adult child when you were being the bully.
That was a conversation killer,off i went.
They are X relatives.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Sat 30-Apr-22 10:04:32

It probably balances out but I like to think that many bullies get their comeuppance in the end, if only because they alienate people and have few real friends. Some of them lead chaotic lives and make bad choices, which again can lead to catastrophe.

Kate1949 Sat 30-Apr-22 10:12:05

My workplace bully was a very unhappy, miserable woman. Her marriage was unhappy, her children troublesome. Her 'reign of terror' ended when she told the boss she was in love with him. He was a happily married man and was horrified. She left.

Flossie777 Sat 30-Apr-22 12:20:34

I was badly bullied at work and one day the bully got sacked for bullying and harassment. I thought it was just me who she hated, but it was lots, much braver that me people, who complained. That was a good day seeing her leaving the premises.

Smileless2012 Sat 30-Apr-22 12:32:54

I think you're right lovebeigecardigans they do alienate people because eventually people see them for what they are and the only 'friends' they tend to keep are bullies themselves.

Blossoming Sat 30-Apr-22 12:38:11

In the case of my work bully people sucked up to her, and even joined in with her bullying, as they were afraid of being her next victim.

Smileless2012 Sat 30-Apr-22 12:44:37

Sadly that's often the case Blossoming but then again bullies are cowards aren't they.