I have a brother inlaw who over the years, continues to try to embarrass me or bring up inappropriate subjects with me in front of other people.
His wife just sits there with a grin on her face, so to me, they contrive it together.
One time, he asked me when my bday was, he knows the date and im 6 yrs older than my husband, but to embarrass me in front of others he kept harping on it until i walked away. I dont care that im older but he seems to want me to! He followed me out of the room and kept asking me, i told him to stop as he was now on the verge of harassment.
Then a few weeks ago, we had visited their home to get keys to their house while they were away. During coffee, out of the blue, he looked at me and said "so do you like $ex?" I almost choaked and my husband tried to change the subject but again to no avail. He kept on going no matter how much i told him to mind his own business and he was being inappropriately disgusting. It got to the stage that I lost my temper and told him to F mind his own business and he was being an A Hole! I then told them i was leaving.
I was surprised that my husband sat there and didnt tell him brother to stop.
I felt dirty and embarrassed.
At home, my husband agreed that his brother was inappropriate and doesnt know why he does it.
I said I will now be limiting my time with them. I'll never stop my husband from visiting, but I no longer want to associate with them.
Last Christmas, I told my bro inlaw and wife, I hadnt seen my daughter for 3 years and had Christmas arranged for us to spend time with her and her husband.
Next minute i get a message saying, the other brother is coming up for Christmas with his partner and the Mother inlaw is also coming up, in other words christmas was at their place with their children and grandchildren but visitors are staying with us!! The mother inlaw has given us scares recently and we thought we'd go along with it as it might be her last Christmas.
However, i said to my husband, why bring her on a 6 hour drive if she was sick? We already had intended to spend time with her over the holidays.
We went along with it to keep the peace, but i told my husband the this will never happen again as we have our own children and grand children that we need to spend christmas with and not with other peoples children and grandchildren.
After Christmas, we find out that the bro and sister inlaw arranged Christmas at their house because it was easier for them to spend it with their own family.
Im fuming!!! And as Ive already told my husband what we'll be doing during future Christmas's, i intend on sticking to it. I will not bend!
If my husband gives in to them, he's free to, however I'll be visiting our family.
Christmas was disgusting btw, the bro and sister inlaw discussed what they do together behind closed doors, then their daughter inlaw and son carried on as well..all in front of their grandchildren, aged 5 to 14.
I removed myself from the room and then left.
Please note, both bro and sis inlaw have had numerous affairs while married, they broke up at one stage, but apparently they forgive and forget.
They then moved around the corner from us!!
Any ideas on how I can deal with this?
Im not an angry or loud person, but when pushed do verbally put someone in their place in a quiet manner. Should i be more conservative or more loud?
I feel like i want to wipe the smirk of his face with a slap, but then im sure he would charge me with assault... they both seem to be getting a high from all of this.
World Athletics has banned trans athletes from competing in women’s sports
Good Morning Friday 24th March 2023
Friendship, advice and support if estrangement has affected your life.