husband doesn't like my baking...

thanks for that all, there are some really good recipes in Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall's book comfort food where he explains the health benefits & he has adapted recipes with less sugar & 50% brown flour finely milled & I think they are great. I just feel so lousy, I tried so hard! But yes I need to get out and do something else so I've offered to help at local national trust houses. I do admit husband is daft and unhelpful, but never mind. Thanks all

I once painted a wall in our first home, while the newly-acquired DH was out. (It needed doing, and we were gradually doing up our first home...)
When he returned, he criticised it.
I have NEVER (and I mean never, in the 44 years which have elapsed since) painted a wall.

Spabbygirl, you say that you took up baking, and that you are not a good cook. You also mention swapping out some ingredients for others.
I suggest that the best way to improve at anything, is to begin by doing it by the book. Once you have worked out how the magic happens, and what the finished results should taste like, and how ingredients work with each other, and got reasonably reliable results, THEN you can begin to make subtle tweaks so that you bakes taste like they should.

And if your DH still doesn't appreciate your cooking, it is because either he really doesn't like sweet things, or he is a p****k. You decide.....

Perhaps he doesn’t like baked goods! Tinkering with recipes when you don’t understand them is never going to yield good results….same for leaving out or swapping ingredients…..if you want him to eat something just make him a cake….you don’t have to eat it…then make yourself something you can eat.

I don’t get this compulsion with baking. I very rarely bake , whether it’s cakes or bread . Mostly due to high fat and sugar content and I rarely eat them. Health and diet is so important as you get older .
I feel from your post that you need a hobby or an interest . Which I totally get . I retired in June last year and made the decision to try new things . I started wild swimming, although not in the winter ( I’m not that hardcore yet) . I volunteer in a charity shop and joined a litter picking group. I do yoga twice a week as well . So do things to please yourself not your husband. With your IBS in mind you could do a course on nutrition.
Good luck

valdali, that’s so sad and mean 😢. I bet you’re a brilliant baker.

Sorry, not connected to OP’s question, but ExDancer you’re the first person I’ve heard of who was diagnosed with IBS but had BAM instead. My consultant said GPs often don’t know about BAM. Maybe we should start a thread. My consultant calls it Bile Acid Malabsorption but I think that’s the same thing. You’ll know all about living with that 🤦🏻‍♀️. Thank god for the meds, changed my life. I’m glad you were diagnosed properly eventually.

Yes you are put your efforts into some other hobby.

I spent 50 years trying to please a husband that couldn’t care less whether I’d made it or it was shop bought …and everyone else said I was an excellent cake maker…and especially the grandkids. So …as you’re not a good baker… why bother. Your retirement….your choice! Don’t waste anymore of your time. Do what I did at retirement …stop doing everything you dont like and start going what you like …in my case it’s history degree and learning a language. Have a think …and discard that oppressive apron!!

Willow68

Seems more to do with only having baking and husband in life. Join a group or go on cookery baking course. We all
Like different foods and it should y really bother you that much that husband doesnt like some of your baking. Get enjoyment out of it .

Agree with this^^ see what courses Adult Education have. Stick to the recipe, they are usually tweaked to perfection by those with experience. It is not called Domestic Science for nothing

If your husband isn't keen on baked goods and you have IBS put your efforts into healthy savoury meals. Much healthier for you and you can batch bake when you're in the mood. Good luck xx

I use gluton free self raising flour and gluton free plain flour

If you are new to baking I think Sourdough probably isn't the thing to start with. Why not try some biscuits? Lots of nice recipes around, they don't tend to need fancy ingredients and are very quick to cook. If you get the timing wrong most of them will survive being a bit overcooked. Most of them will keep for ages in an airtight container so you won't need to chuck them out.

He won't walk past the lemon drizzle cake. So make him that, and make the sourdough things for yourself. That is all.

If the roles were reversed would you eat his baking, that you didn't like, just to keep him happy?
Of course not!

You can bake with wholemeal flour, not everything is as good but many things are. The flour needs to be fresh though,so don't buy so much st a time
Don't throw what has been rejected away, offer it on olio

I find baking very therapeutic, it relaxes me and I enjoy it. When the children were young I used to spend a Tuesday in the kitchen making home made bread and varying different goodies every week. I never made tea that night the children would all indulge and there was often something left to do another night after tea.
Rarely do it now as hubby is diabetic and I am dairy free and all the children left home years ago.
Agree with the others look for something that interests you, gets you out of the house and gives you pleasure. I attend a few local groups a week, crafting and free lunch one day and a knit and natter another day.

MawtheMerrier

Tell him you hear what he is saying and that you intend to take up crocheting instead

Blimey Maw I don’t know which one to choose. And I’m not referring to the crocheted clothing. 😜

Hand the cooking over to him, let him go shopping and go out.
If you don't like what he cooks, cook something you do like.
You both need to tolerate each other. He isn't your new hobby but you could easily find one that you like and maybe he would have a nice meal waiting when you got in.

Totally understand you wanting to do something to bring pleasure to you both when you retired and had more time on your hands. It hasn't worked out the way you planned, but you're in control of what you do next. If you don't want to abandon the baking, maybe experiment a little more and try to find a small number of baked items that one or both of you like and can freeze ok(savoury or scones etc might be a compromise?). Even better if they are things which can be sliced or frozen in small/individual portions. You can then choose when you feel like dipping in. Maybe chat to your husband about other things one or both of you have fancied doing but didn't have time to do when you worked. gardening( even if you've just got a balcony), sewing, woodwork (not just for men), photography or whatever. Possibly volunteering would help you to feel better about using the free time you have. Don't let the dream of a mound of perfect baking become your main focus or a cause of friction - you take control and find new things to enjoy. All the best.

NotTooOld, what a nice comment. Good for you!

Ive noticed the cake baking thing at my church. Certain people were known for providing lovely bakes for refreshments afterwards. As they got older they began to find it more of a chore and some became too frail to get to church. I used to love eating these cakes, but now Im trying to lose weight for my health and cant really afford to eat a big calorie laden extra. I'm really pleased that we have cakes less often now and I can resist shop bought biscuits more readily. I think more and more people are more careful especially as they age to try and resist temptation. So if you want to bake you will need to find an outlet.

I would have been hurt too,definitely the ingredients,why not make cupcakes and then have fun decorating them ( just for you) cake decorating is fun and you can practice on grease proof paper.You can find any recipe you want for baking on you tube then just follow along that should help,good luck.

How mean!!

When I first read this I thought it said "my husband doesn't like my BANKING "

I kind of think that the actual baking is not the issue....its that "loading up the table with baked goodies" image.....makes me think that there is more to it that his not liking your baking....