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Help... relationship issues

(31 Posts)
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Lucyloo12 Sun 01-Oct-23 10:53:04

I've been looking for a partner for years but now want to give up. My last attempt.... I met a man on online dating. He seemed perfect personality wise but very overweight. The weight is becoming an issue as he wants me to do the food for him to lose weight! I think he needs to do this himself as I feel if he fails it becomes my fault and we dont even live together. Anyway that problem aside.... we recently got to the bedroom bit, unfortunately it turns out he is rather less endowed than I hoped. Now I am faced with a lovely personality but physically I am not attracted to him at all. How on earth am I to get out of this without hurting him. I feel like I'm kicking a puppy. Please help.

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Lucyloo12 Sun 01-Oct-23 14:07:54

Thank you Sukie. X

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Shelflife Sun 01-Oct-23 15:02:24

My advice is to simply tell him it's over , don't suggest a platonic relationship - it won't work. We have all had romantic relationships that had to be ended - difficult I know, but needs must. It's straight forward , You our don't fancy him - end of! Simply tell him in the kindest way so you can both move forward. Good luck.

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BlueBelle Sun 01-Oct-23 15:28:37

I agree with shelflife I think he may say let’s carry on as a platonic relationship but it won’t stay that way because once it’s crossed over it’s crossed over, he will still be holding out hope
I think you ve done the right thing and told him in a nice way but I would be very cautious about a friendship

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Madgran77 Sun 01-Oct-23 17:17:58

Lucyloo12

Thank you lemsip I didn't know that. I have phoned him and both have agreed the intimacy should not have happened. Obviously I did not mention the weight or size but I do feel he deserves someone who will give him the whole package which I can't. He is disappointed but said he'd rather I be honest. I did tell him I felt I'd slept with my friend and it felt wrong. It was very awkward and hard to do but he deserves better. On that note he is still having dinner with me later, chicken salad of course!

Well done Not easy but assertive and the right thing to do!

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Theexwife Sun 01-Oct-23 20:05:53

Well done for telling him so promptly and thanks for coming back and telling us.

You will be able to tell over dinner if just a friendship is possible.

Don't let this stop you from looking for a more suitable partner.

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