Petition: Give legal right of contact between grandchildren and grandparents

Callistemon21

DiamondLily

Smileless2012

The awful situation you and your family in shows how this can and does work DL. Ensuring that your GC doesn't have unsupervised contact with the birth mother, and working hard to ensure that your family will be an important and relevant part of the child's life.

Not long to wait now for the final judgement to be known .

Well, it is for us. So far. But, whatever happens, I know that every agency is saying that the birth mother needs to be kept clear.

Anything else is just the icing on the cake.🙂

Best wishes for a good outcome for you all DiamondLily

Thank you. 🙂

fancy that yes of course I do, I've spoken to so many people here, particularly in the estrangement forum which is an opportunity you don't get on most forums

I have made good friends here among some estranged parents and we have given each other so much support.

One has reunited with her daughter which was beautiful... My mother will never be capable of that sadly because she is abusive.

My mother dug herself a hole I think, at some point in life she needed an emotional punch bag and knew it was wrong. She has fabricated a reality to hide that from others and herself. Were she to even start to make amends, she has too much to unravel and admitting to that would cost here every relationship she has

Some issues just don't get the far, having a bad time in life doesn't and taking it out on someone doesn't always lead to shame and abuse to cover it. Doesn't always lead to justifying people's own bad behaviour to the point they feel justified to continue. Some people realize they were wrong and apologise and move forward... And I am not saying who that is in the relationship because it can be anyone

Good for you. 👍

Yes...

Gransnet has been so beneficial for my healing journey and I've become such a strong person now I surprise myself

Well, if it’s helped you to become a better grandparent, then good. 👍

Glad GN has helped you VS.

It’s so nice to see that this thread has returned to normality.

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Yes, it doesn’t really need insults and uproar. 🙄

Apologies GMS but I had to respond to that horrible post to DL and I’ve only just rejoined the thread.
So, as we were……

No need to apologise maddy. The thread became most unpleasant with unwarranted insults.

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DL and GSM 👍

I’ve had a busy couple of days and just catching up. Thanks to gnhq Lily for popping in when things got heated (even more heated)
DiamondLily, it’s good to read the team around the baby in your family is functioning well and supporting the right outcome for the infant.
A number of people have commented that the family courts, sw and Cafcass don’t always get it right. This is true but doesn’t mean our family laws aren’t as good as those in other countries.
We have huge substance misuse problems, inevitably this means violence, chaos , poor mental health annd inconsistent parenting is increasing. Alongside this, austerity destroyed preventive and support services.
The best interests of children are usually but not always served by remaining with birth parents or in their family of origin.
This has been confirmed by research over many years. Safeguarding is complex work. Caseloads in sw teams and Cafcass are impossible.
Enough

Yes, the Children Act, back in 1986 (?) started with the best of intentions. But, I suppose society has changed.

As you say, we have increased use of drugs, increased use of other things, and often, the result is a chaotic household.

Very young kids are carrying knives, others are becoming sexualised long before they are emotionally ready to be, and too many people want their own way, about everything, too often.

Resilience and common sense often seems in short supply, and I don’t know why.

We have more than any previous generation, there is more support, financial and practical, than ever before, and yet there are, apparantly, increased mental health issues, such as stress, anxiety and depression.

All this impacts on the care of children - so, no wonder SW’s, teachers etc. are struggling with the work and caseloads.

I don’t know the answer.🤷‍♀️

Society has changed without a doubt DL and not for the better in so many ways and IMO the breakdown of the family is an important factor.

Divorce and estrangement can rock the very foundations of a child's world if not handled maturely and in a way which is sensitive to a child's needs.

Children's Act 1989 is out of date, Children's act 2004, which was amended in 2017 (Children and Social care act).

Oh and also drug use, smoking and drinking in teenagers have all been steadily falling

I also do not agree mental health in children is worse now... Simply. People are listening too and helping them more.

Comments really surprise me sometimes, like there is some sort of generational parenting competition going on... There isn't, we are just learning as a society... Things are getting better in many ways

Are children more "entitled" or are children more aware of their own rights and needs?

The 1989 Act is still in force and still relevant. Amendments were made by the 2004 Act and further provisions are contained in the 2017 Act.

That's what I said, if you read the 1989 act, that is out of date, you need to read the 2004 act and the 2017 amendment

Indeed. References to the 1989 Act nowadays would be deemed to include amendments, and it is readily available online in amended form.

I think in my coursework we called it an extension

Then there is the Protection of Children act 1999, Working Together to Safeguard Children 2015 and EYFS stage 2017 as well as DBS which are all the relevant ones I think?

Oh and GDPR, all safeguarding

The children act 1989 has been added to as most legislation is. It was excellent when introduced and enhanced, improved practice.
The first Working Together document was one of the Blair government’s early interventions, along with the early Sure Start family centres. Blair also invested in early years in the knowledge that it would improve outcomes throughout the life of the child

Yes it's main aim is to keep children protected from harm