Daughter won't let me near her baby

Jacqueline, please don't leave GN . There is lots of support here. I am no expert but it sounds as though your DD has post natal depression or another form if mental illness, that would certainly explain her behaviour. Come back and take advantage of support here. Good luck.

Well, if you are still here...I'm no expert, but it almost sounds like she's trying to prove, in a way, that she's a woman, fully able to have a husband and take care of a kid by saying to you and the world I don't need my mommy anymore. I mean, she is pretty young to already becoming a wife and mom. I was young too, had my son right before I turned 21, so I remember the feeling of being insecure about being able to do it. Like I wasn't quite a woman yet. But everyone's reactions to life changing events are different; for me, I didn't want to prove I could do it, I appreciated my mom's vast knowledge (no internet in those days to look anything up) about taking care of a baby. She came around a lot and I appreciated the help, even though my husband helped too, he had work. So maybe your daughter is extremely insecure about becoming a mom? And she feels somehow you might try and take over things? It's a guess, it could be something else that is bothering her, but what is the question.....

The way your original post reads it seems you and your daughter has problems before she had the baby - at the very least since the pregnancy, and you do seem a little dismissive of “the boy” who surely is a man no? And on top of that your daughters soon to be husband. But it seems to predate the birth so it doesn’t seem that is post partum issue. And I guess my first thought would be if you were already having difficulties before the baby was here why did you expect to be let around baby etc afterward ? It seems you have at least met this new baby once as your daughter thinks you held the baby too long, which among new mothers is really quite common. Every minute away from their baby seems lengthy - did you perhaps hold longer than she seemed comfortable? You claim all the reasons given to your bath and are not logical but that means she’s at least giving reasons whether you find them logical or otherwise- while I’m sure it’s upsetting to not be wanted around the baby od keep your perspective on your relationship with your daughter , which is clearly in poor repair right now and really trying to think back to what may have happened at the start of the troubles and take her “illogical reasons “ at face value. What is illogical to you may not be to her and at the end of the day , she’s the one you’re trying to rectify a relationship with. At the end of the day the baby can tbe the point. You’re not going to be around the baby if you and your daughter don’t get on. So focus your energy there.