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Gettingadjusted1234 Mon 07-Apr-25 04:22:23

I need to know how to handle a recent friend I met once for a girl’s lunch several weeks ago. We both enjoyed it but I have given up on getting to know her better and occasionally doing fun things together. She continues to text me and say she wants to have lunch again but has an excuse when I suggest a day to meet. She then says we may need to wait a couple of weeks. I feel she is playing games, but she is the one who keeps contacting me. Why does she continue texting? Why does she want to meet but makes excuses? Is she stringing me along?
What should I tell her? Maybe say, “call me only when you have a specific day and place to meet!”???!!

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BlueBelle Mon 07-Apr-25 06:41:14

Strange post are you male or female, in school or out ?

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argymargy Mon 07-Apr-25 06:56:50

I personally would draw a line under that one, as I just can’t be doing games. So, I would not respond at all.

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Sarnia Mon 07-Apr-25 07:37:52

I agree with your final sentence. Leave it with her to contact you when she has firm details.

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keepingquiet Mon 07-Apr-25 08:31:32

I can't be doing with people messing me about. I would either organise something myself (sounds as if you're not too keen) or just ignore her messages until she comes up with something constructive.

Years ago I would get invited out for lunch by some people who then decided they weren't hungry and didn't order any food. I didn't get it but needless to say I no longer meet them at all, never mind for lunch!

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Churchview Mon 07-Apr-25 09:11:19

She sounds exhausting and as though this would never be an easy pleasure for you. Next time she texts saying, 'We must meet again for lunch' I'd reply 'Yes that would be lovely.' Don't suggest a date, don't expect her to and hopefully it will all fizzle out.

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Oreo Mon 07-Apr-25 09:20:40

Churchview

She sounds exhausting and as though this would never be an easy pleasure for you. Next time she texts saying, 'We must meet again for lunch' I'd reply 'Yes that would be lovely.' Don't suggest a date, don't expect her to and hopefully it will all fizzle out.

Good advice here.

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AuntieE Thu 10-Apr-25 14:38:54

You say you have given up on getting to know her better, so quite frankly, I don't understand the problem.

Either ignore her texts or tell her you don't have time (are not interested in continuing the acquaintanceship)-

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Redblueandgreen Thu 10-Apr-25 15:07:37

I tend to prefer more predictability and openness in friendships and other relationships than you’re getting here. I wouldn’t waste my headspace trying to work out what’s up with her because you’ll probably never know. As has been suggested in previous replies, draw a line on this.

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FranA Thu 10-Apr-25 15:42:23

She obviously plans her diary well in advance so you could ask her to give you some suggested dates. You did say you enjoyed meeting up with her.

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Grannylynj Thu 10-Apr-25 15:44:38

Fxxxx. Off i would say

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Leavesden Thu 10-Apr-25 16:40:46

I would block her, I wouldn’t waste your time on someone who wants to play games.

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pascal30 Thu 10-Apr-25 16:52:44

It's not clear why you want to meet.. but it sounds as though you are being played..

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Sadgrandma Thu 10-Apr-25 17:05:42

Gettingadjusted1234
What should I tell her? Maybe say, “call me only when you have a specific day and place to meet!”???!!

I would do just that

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Sarahr Thu 10-Apr-25 17:49:00

Just say " That will be nice. Let me know when and where once you have arranged it". Ball in her court.

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NemosMum Thu 10-Apr-25 18:05:10

Personality problem? Steer well away!

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Mojack26 Thu 10-Apr-25 19:45:04

Ditto

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