How to go to church when I am not into groups

I go to mass when I can, on my way to town. I enjoy the peace and 20 minute service . My family are Catholic but I am not, although I’m familiar with the mass.

I say good morning to anyone who looks my way as well as the Priest as I leave, but never stay for coffee.

An interesting topic.

Usually it's people complaining about no one speaking to them when they went to a new church.

There’s absolutely no obligation to stay behind after the service for coffee and chat if you don’t wish to. No one will be offended if you choose to leave.
Not every church offers tea and coffee after the service, I think it depends on several factors - the type of service, the time of the service, available facilities, the desire of the congregation and so on.

Milsa

I am foreign woman married to a Catholic. I used to church go in my country, listen to the service, light a candle, see a priest if I have to and leave. No groups, no coffee meet ups. Etc.

I am not into groups

Just sit near the door and make a run for it as soon as they finish.

I agree with Caleo that a Roman Catholic or Anglo Catholic/high church service would suit you better.
I’m a pretty sociable person, but like to keep to myself in a service. My late DH was in a ‘low’ church and I truly disliked so many people surrounding me, greeting me etc. when I accompanied him. Very good people, but not for me. If I had coffee with him afterwards in the church hall, that was a different matter, I really enjoyed that!

We all have different needs and it doesn’t mean one is better than the other, it’s just different styles.

You're very welcome Nanny27

Thanks Aldom

I am not a "joiner"
When I go I might wave a "hello" but don't stay.
Just a polite "thank you, I appreciate you asking but I won't join you" (if asked) is enough!

Thank you all, seems a morning service will be good for me. I am not against chats but I found the groups are not for me. Too long of an explanation and how I expect a group to enrich me but it does not do it for me so far. People covered some of the reasons ( like a man with a leaky eye who never met me, grabbed my whole face with two hands and forcefully kissed me and did the same to my daughter)

All the Roman Catholic services I've been to over the last few years have a "signof peace" moment.

Aim for a midweek service, or early morning where there is room to sit apart.
There are online services - ( I "went" to mass all around the world during COVID) I recommend Bishop Gary www.youtube.com/channel/UCRinXZ2d6GBMpnDM7boV1CA

gransruleok

The last service I attended, the congregation were invited to turn and hug the person to their left. Made me very uncomfortable, not been back, not my thing at all.

Since covid it is not at all common to even shake hands

The RC Church was a major part of my DMs life - but she only went to Mass and never joined in the coffee etc afterwards. She definitely had a quick chat with a few folk but that was it - she was off! I have to say that she was an impatient lady altogether - no time to waste, though not sure what she did with all that spare time!

When she died, I not only declined the Requiem Mass (far too long-winded for mum), I also asked the funeral directors to make decent progress from her house to the crematorium. It suited her well.

Our church is a very kind community and we do enjoy meeting up for coffee and events. But some do choose to just come to the service and leave, everyone is free to come to church in the way that suits them.
The PP who referred to the hugging - that is a part of our church if England service, wishing our neighbours 'peace'. Some shake hands, others wave, others hug. We are free to do this in whatever way we feel comfortable with.

Nanny27

Must be me being extraordinary dim this afternoon but after reading Exhalted Wombat's "What's the difference " ending I'm afraid I still don't get it.

When an atheist claims that they just believe in one fewer god than Christians, it's not a minor difference.
Christians dismiss all but one possibility for who created the universe. While atheists dismiss all possibilities and claim the universe came from nothing.

Google

Milsa - I am a Catholic. I am not in any groups, but I do go to Sunday Mass if I have time. Our church is open during the day and I pop in sometimes , on my way to the shops.
There is nothing stopping going in to say a prayer.. you don’t have to chat to anyone, not even the Priest. And if you want to chat, he will be there . Good Luck

NannyMags I'm so glad it's not just me

Nanny27 I do not understand the statement either, can the OP please enlighten us? Exhalted Wombat

Must be me being extraordinary dim this afternoon but after reading Exhalted Wombat's "What's the difference " ending I'm afraid I still don't get it.

Yes, churches tend to try to make a newcomer 'welcome', they're very keen on 'fellowship'. And I'm afraid a polite 'no, thank you' will be construed by some as just shyness, and they'll keep trying. Perhaps you'll have to spell out your preference for solitary worship at greater length a couple of times. But if you become a regular I'm afraid you'll have to put up with a lot of friendly nods and smiles.

What's the difference between a Christian and an atheist? The Christian doesn't believe in just one less God...

The last service I attended, the congregation were invited to turn and hug the person to their left. Made me very uncomfortable, not been back, not my thing at all.

You don't have to join a group. Just go to mass etc and then leave.

When I go to church, I leave as soon as the service is over. Others go to an hotel nearby for coffee, which costs £3.50p, a price I am unwilling to pay. I couldn't give a damn what the others say, anyway they are all wealthier than I.

It's what spoils it sometimes for me. I like to sing the hymns, say prayers, and go to the altar for bread and wine. That's it.
saying that I did stop at a church where I used to live for coffee and met some lovely people. I got involved with them doing teas, washing up, etc. for funerals, etc. at the village hall, including for a really lovely lady who sadly passed away too young.
i have never found a church here, yet i feel happy with

Go to church and then leave. Why do you think you need to join a group? That is your decision not a pre requisite.