Instinct or Inherited Memory?

Holly - exactly how have you managed to calm your mutt down please? Pretty please....?

Lol Dragonfly. My method with this particular dog would most likely be frowned upon. He was very ill-treated and trusted no-one so shouting at him when he seriously over-stepped the mark (as he was frightened most of the time, he was prone to aggression) like clamping his teeth on my arm, I would screw up the angriest face I could manage and glare at him whilst talking very low to him. It only happened once more then I ignored him completely but carried on being very stern with him (but gentle and caring). It was only when he trusted me and a firm 'NO! Don't you dare' (same growly voice) taught him he had to stop. His instinct will stick kick in now and again and I now all I have to say is 'ERM!!' coupled with the glare. When he does as I ask, lots of praise, pats and even a kiss and a hug as well and told what a really good boy he is.

He'd never been trained to walk on the lead either (what a nightmare that was) but he's very good now. Maybe part of him knew this was last chance saloon (he'd been deemed as unsuitable for rehoming until I was asked if I could help him) and decided to co-operate. I'm not a dog trainer in any sense of the word but I don't stand any nonsense from dogs at all - he pulls at me, he gets yanked straight back. The upshot is, before I get shouted down, he was not put to sleep and now lives a life being spoilt rotten with me (he was supposed to go back to the shelter but I couldn't part with him).

Oh well done Holly - what a lucky mutt he is! Mine is just a typical bloody adorable springer. She's well behaved on the lead now, after huge effort, and fine on her own with me at home. But if visitors come she goes bonkers and just wants to sit on them, kiss them, use them as a trampoline..... We've had some excellent help and advice from a guy who trains and judges Gundogs, and we've got everything sorted except this idiotic behaviour with visitors. Keeping her shut away or on a lead till she's calm works fine and calms her really quickly. The reward is to be allowed to greet the visitors calmly, which she does. THEN she goes bonkers! Love her really.....

My father was brought up by foster parents and had very little contact with his mother until he was about 24 at the beginning of the war.
They lived over 100 miles away from each other and even then contact was limited. They lost touch in 1948 when she was said to have moved to North Wales. (None of this was ever spoken about at home and only came out in about 1995.) I managed to find she had died two years earlier at age 96. I made contact with the niece of her second husband who was as near to next of kin as she could get.

The niece knew nothing about my fathers existence but was was very surprised by how many mannerisms my Dad and his mother shared. Their way of standing, hand movements and how they laughed.

Given the very limited amount of contact, these patterns could not have been down to early imprinting.

Why am I not at all phased by anything that 'flutters' except moths ? I can't explain it. I will happily let a butterfly land on me but rush from the room if anything bigger than clothes moth is seen.

Anything to do with Japan. Totally illogical. When I was 13 in France I met a young Japanese boy and couldn't bear to look at him, he was very hurt and I was brought up to be very polite, but I just couldn't do it. Ever since, I have fought against visits there, artefacts and souvenirs, anything. To my knowledge none of my family have had anything to do with Japan, so it's completely irrational, it seems to me.

Iam64 - I can relate to your nephew's resemblance to his uncle; my first husband and I divorced when my son was around 14 months old and he has never met his father since - yet I often see the same facial expressions and mannerisms from my son that I saw from his father and he has also developed his father's love of cars and tinkering endlessly with them! As you say, it clearly can't be learned behaviour so has to be inherited doesn't it.

Oh Dragonfly - your description has me chuckling away here as I have the same from both of my dogs (and one previous to that), my eldest granddaughter jumps up on the low garden wall to escape the jumping and crying with excitement from the dogs lol. I also had to resort to professional help with that behaviour but so far, not much luck either.

Still, I'm sure you'll agree it's better to have dogs who love everyone as opposed to aggression from them towards strangers so we're quite lucky really How old is your dog?

janerowena - that is unusual isn't it. It conjures up all sorts of thoughts of what memories you could have inherited and if your family has historical ties to Japan in any way.

I wonder wether these fears or whatever they are, stem from incidents happening in babyhood, or up to about 3, which we can't quite remember. For instance I vaguely remember seeing pictures of Chinese or Japanese soldiers and being horrified that these people could be about somewhere. Like JaneRowena.

Maybe that's it, culag.

A good point Culag - it's surprising what the sub-conscious will store away that never returns as a full memory but just enough to give you the heebie-jeebies!

Very interesting. I always get a strange feeling when we pass a certain row of cottages just outside Bicester. Something in my head says I know them and 'something' happened there. I have never been in them and as far as I know there are no family connections.