The Age of No Retirement-I hate this name!

Who do you think sits on the committees of charities and school governor boards, Silverfish ? Who does prison visiting, runs after-school clubs and sports? Who manages the volunteers in charity shops?

Do you imagine that they can do all that without also being able to chair a meeting and get all items on the agenda covered in a reasonable time, without the more aggressive committee members bulldozing the meeker ones?

How do you think they co-ordinate gangs of children with high spirits and more energy than Torness Power Station and train them in their sports without management skills to equal that of the teachers who teach them through the week? The same with managing a charity shop or running a playgroup - people to co-ordinate, equipment and supplies to maintain, paperwork to keep in order, red tape to negotiate, all while keeping up-to-date with developments in the field.

You don't really believe that without paid work all these dainty little ladies are sitting all day drinking tea, though, do you? You say you do to see the responses.

Who actually did your domesticity Silverfish?

Why do some people think that the world of paid employment is the only real world?

Odd. IMO.

Especially when the employment of many women doesn't involve boardrooms and high powered meetings. More often than not, it involved doing what the (usually male) boss told you to do.

It was ten years. #nevercouldcount

I could no more have gone back to work when my baby was a month old than cut off my own arm .

I don't think going to work has made me more intelligent. I meet the public every day of my working life. I go to staff meetings, meet deadlines, some of the time I have to do what I'm told by people I don't like or respect. All the normal push and pull of working life. I don't think it's made me more interesting. It has given me lots of skills I may not have learnt if it wasn't necessary. Many people I know who haven't had to go out to work for what ever reason still have intelligent opinions. They take an interest in life and the world around them. They read, they research, they analyse. I would never look down on anyone. We know nothing of what goes on in other peoples life. People learn in all types of ways. Living,loving, caring, hurting, loosing, suffering and happiness. All these things teach us and make us interesting people capable of intelligent opinions. I hope after years of hard work I will enjoy my retirement. I hope I won't vegetate. I hope I will still be a valuable member of my family and society. Even if it's just smiling and having the time to spend with the people around me.

Anyway work is boring , how much n icer than to spend your days doing exactly WHAT YOU WANT TO DO.

I stayed at home while my children were small (in the 70's) because I couldn't afford to pay for childcare. I didn't feel stifled or held back in any way, because I have a mind and a brain! I read. DH worked at 2 jobs (both quite mind-numbing, come to think of it, but this is what he did to keep the family clothed and fed). Once the children were a bit older I was able to get into work/college, etc, and it was easier to find childcare (mainly friends - we all helped each other out that way). Some of the jobs I did in the early years of getting into employment were actually dull - and I have to say, were mind-numbing, if you consider that sometimes the main topic was how expensive soap powder/mince/margarine was in this or that shop. The only type of work that was open to me at that time was factory work and heads were down at all times, trying to make enough money to make a difference at home again. So - I suppose I may have been better at home, in that case, Silverfish, because the people I worked with were working flat-out, trying to earn a bob or two extra, and there wasn't any time (or inclination), to discuss matters of the day, the state of the country etc. I know I was capable of something more mind-stretching, but it wasn't available to me then.
Perhaps you needed the stimulus of working, Silverfish - I didn't. Before I went back out to work I had the imagination to be able to understand the reason for the strikes of the early 70's, by reading and discussing the problems that the country faced with like-minded intelligent friends. Meanwhile, my DH contributed to my lifestyle by paying enough taxes in his two jobs to fund it.

Silverfish if in your opinion, only woman that work can have intelligent opinions, what went wrong in your case

Ouch!

He he he!!!

Newist, you are demeaning yourself by being so rude. have you ever had responsibilities. I have said several times that someone who has the stimulation of going to work regularly must have more informed opinions than someone who has the daily challenge of what to cook or to do the washing/ironing etc.

Have you never heard of cabbage brain which is what many women feel like when looking after kids all day.

Jinglebell, you don't need to he he he, have you worked or had responsibilities.

If a woman says to me 'my husband says ...' then I will ask her if she has a mind of her own.

Well there you go, I actually think that looking down on people who don't work is rude. Quite a few Gnetters may not of done paid employment, and ...you look down on them

Maybe your brain was like a cabbage while yo looked after your children, Silverfish. Mine was very active. Perhaps I was lucky to have that type of brain.

I could be wrong but I think that Silverfish has said in the past that she likes winding people up [is that not the case Silverfish?] which is what she's doing here. But , then again, I have the memory span of a goldfish, having spent so many years staying at home with my family.

I think that silverfish is just trying to wind people up. It is not really possible that anyone could hold such bigoted views.

I know many people who stayed at home to look after their children, and they set about opening their little ones' minds to what is out there in the world and at the same time expanded their own horizons. Silverfish clearly never gave herself that a chance - just imagined that being a mother was about domesticity.

During the years that I was at home with my children, a cursory glance at our house would have indicated the low priority that domesticity played in my life. Believe it or not, I learned a great deal from my children, both by learning alongside them by following their interests and helping them to find answers to the questions they asked; and by observing their passion for the world and rekindling a sense of wonder.

All my experiences as a mother stood me in good stead when I returned to my career. I am sorry that you missed out on all this silverfish. It is your loss.

I have just seen on another thread that your career is reflexology - is rubbing feet more stimulating than washing dishes?! Just asking.

It's just as well we are not all the same, or no-one would want to look after children all day, no child-minders, nursery nurses, pre-school teachers, primary teachers, secondary teachers, paediatric hospital nurses . . .

There's a thought, now. These people are working for a living. Do they all have cabbage brains too, with all that contact with children? How on earth do they do their jobs!

silverfish honestly your asking for trouble by being so derogatory about women who stay at home. Many people have been imprisoned in solitary confinement for many years and their brains don't turn to mush. If a women stays at home and allows herself to become in your words 'a cabbage brain' then unless there is some form of domestic abuse going on then that's through choice. There are many ways of of stimulating your brain and you don't need to go out to work to do it. Even when I didn't work I had my own opinions. I was never the sort who'd say" my husband says" on the other hand I know a very respected school teacher who's worked all her life. Who tells me I can't come and visit because my husband " doesn't like me to travel on my own on the motorway. I feel like shouting " who cares what your husband likes or doesn't like" I suspect that the husband can be very controlling and she wants a quiet life. Who am I to judge.

I must apologise for my previous post - it was just a homeopathic dose of one's own medicine!

Silverfish, how are you with a sense of humour? Managed to develope that at all?

Go on! Have a little laugh at yourself.

Sorry for the 'e' there. #bedtime

A favourite aunt of mine was a newly qualified teacher when she married my uncle and went to live with him on his farm in a remote rural area. Growing up I was impressed with how industrious she was with various cottage industries - selling vegetables she had grown at the local market (keeping meticulous stock and financial records), teaching the children of the farm workers, running a basic clinic for them too, and finishing her doctorate in philosophy much the same time as her eldest finished school. Oh yes of course she was a stay at home mum who didn't go out to work.

Silverfish, you are talking through your hat.

Or a under stimulated brain jings

Ana Thanks for the link. I don't usually look at those things on the right hand side of the page

Back to the OP. I'm afraid I agree with Trisher and others who have said they dislike the term 'Age of no-retirement'. I too am enjoying every minute of my retirement. I am equally sure that my brain didn't atrophy during the years I spent as a SAHM.

I've looked at the link - can anyone explain to me what 'Britain's first ever national debate & exhibition to discover the value in society in which people are living and working longer' actually means?
Am I missing something here? What value in society?

GNHQ Why are you supporting this? It is being organised by an organisation called Trading Times https://www.tradingtimes.org.uk which appears to be nothing more than an employment agency.
Not only that, they want people to donate to fund the cost of their conference or whatever it is.
Come on, GNHQ. We weren't born yesterday

There are far too many variables here for there to be any conclusion drawn surely? If I take my group of friends that I have known for many many years none of us were sahm full time - some went out to work part-time, some full time whilst the children were small. All worked full time once the children were older. Now we are all in receipt of our pensions, some of us are doing voluntary work, some part-time paid work and one nothing at all. I enjoy the company of all of them - they've remained bright, articulate, interested in the world - and always have been. Those of us who still do paid work do so because we really enjoy it as do those who are doing voluntary work. I think the really great thing is that we are lucky to be doing what we choose to do