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Has Gransnet changed for the worse?

(138 Posts)
mcem Sat 09-Mar-19 09:03:44

I know I'm not alone in thinking that, on thread after thread, the ethos of GN has changed significantly.

Brexit, immigration, benefits are just some of the topics that attract nasty, xenophobic, cruel posts from newer right-wing posters.

These days I tend to leave a GN browsing session feeling thoroughly disheartened that these posters are probably also grandparents who may have real influence over innocent or gullible minds.

Farmor15 Sat 09-Mar-19 16:23:16

I've been a member for about a year and a half, and haven't really noticed any significant change for the worse - in fact I've seen more new names in the last while, which I think is a good thing. In forums like this, some people join, stay around for a while and then drift away, so "new blood" is always needed.

Every now and then there is a thread which provokes a bit of a spat between members. I've been around long enough now to recognise names of those who I might feel share my opinions and others who don't.

I'm not in UK, so completely avoid the political threads. If I want opinions about Brexit or anything else, I can listen to BBC radio, watch the debates on TV or read newspapers. As others have said in this thread, people are so fixed in their views that no amount of debate is going to change their minds.

I read Gransnet mainly for opinions about grandparenting and relationships and have found lots of useful information from other's experiences.

BlueBelle Sat 09-Mar-19 15:59:31

I welcome the strident views because it alerts me to who I don’t want for a friend ? and who I do
It’s unforginable in my mind to correct someone’s spelling a lot is down to predictive text anyway
As for Remainers being more vocal you ve got to be kidding!

bikergran Sat 09-Mar-19 15:55:48

Been here since ermmm I think 2011/12 and will always whichever way GN turns be so grateful for the support when my dh died, lots and lots of virtual condolences (if they would have been cards I would have had to paper the wall with them) smile

From compassionate strangers flowers

bikergran Sat 09-Mar-19 15:51:38

lol Nanny smile

M0nica Sat 09-Mar-19 15:41:02

I have been a member of GN almost since inception and I think there has been a real downwards trajectory in the level of discussion on many subjects, especially political.

When GN started, and before the 2015 election, I can remember threads where people with different views could actually swap opinions and ask those with different views questions about why they supported those policies and get reasoned answer. Now you can ask someone a question until you are blue in the face and no answer will ever come. They stick to a party line and follow the royal dictum of 'never explain', although they usually ignore the prequel to that phrase, never complain, by complaining constantly

The other problem is that most political threads end up being personal sniping matches between 3 or 4 posters, that go one for page after page until the original thread is completely lost. This personal sniping is now spreading to other threads - this ridiculous sniping about minor typos in posts, for example.

I doubt if a single one of my posts (even this one) has ever been free of any typos or minor errors. I only correct if they affect meaning, Should anyone feel a need to draw my attention to any of my typos, I can tell them now they are wasting their time.

Grandad 1943, this forum is only mainly female because men do not sign up for it - and there is a not a lot we can do about that.

gillybob Sat 09-Mar-19 15:18:19

I’ve been on GN since day one. I’m pleased to say that on the whole it has been brilliant and I have had some fantastic support during hard times ( illnesses, hardships, family issues, school appeals and plenty more) and couldn’t thank those members enough for their help, kindness and support . But (isn’t there always one ) there are a few times when I’ve thought “that’s it, I’m finished” . Over the years I have had my spelling and grammar corrected and couldn’t care less. But being verbally abused and threatened with being “outed” because I said my DGD didn’t like her teacher , being told by PM that I must’ve been dragged up ( and much worse) for saying the word “bloody” on a jokey thread about jigsaws shock and way back in the early days someone (no longer around ) told me that she was considering reporting my DDiL and DGD to the “authorities” for helping at the stables in return for stabling her horse are taking things to a whole another level entirely . Imagine it in RL ? You couldn’t make it up could you ?

I left for a few months over Christmas / new year as my DH was very poorly and have only recently started posting again ( I must be bloomin’ soft in the head ) but, spending most of my working days sitting alone I really do value the virtual friendship that I get from most of the GN members ...... and maybe I’m a glutton for punishment smile

Grandad1943 Sat 09-Mar-19 15:06:55

I stumbled into this forum believing it was for all grandparents both male and female. I had made a couple of posts before I became aware that the forum was in the main for women only

Being male, I was thinking of not posting further, when in response to those first couple of posts I made, there appeared posts pointing out my spelling and grammar mistakes particularly from one very longstanding member of this forum.

Being someone who has suffered from a mild form of dyslexia for my entire life, the action of the above member and others made me decide to remain on the forum and keep on making posts.

Like others, I find the actions of the "grammar police" on this forum its worst facet and is always likely to generate harsh counter posts bringing about general aggression in threads.

However, for me, the comments on my spelling mistakes did eventually turn into an asset. For many years I have been able to use spelling and grammar checkers on my desktop and laptop computers in the office where I work. However, the criticism I received on this forum made me look around for a mobile version of those apps. In that, I found "Grammarly" a great app for phones and tablets which I now use for the checking all text documents on mobile. It is not perfect, but a great asset for persons such as myself

So, as the old adage states, " it is an ill wind which blows no one any good"

Namsnanny Sat 09-Mar-19 15:01:59

Bikergran.....100 lines and stand in the corner with a dunces hat on...bovver not bother!!!! ;-)

Gonegirl Sat 09-Mar-19 14:49:30

I love you andy.

MissAdventure Sat 09-Mar-19 14:47:39

I'm sure gransnet loves you, too andy wink

andycameron69 Sat 09-Mar-19 14:44:52

I love gransnet, a great site

thank you all

GillT57 Sat 09-Mar-19 14:38:01

Actually lemon it is a bit unfair to say that it is us remainers who are argumentative or fire things up, there are a few strident posters on the leaving side of Brexit.

EllanVannin Sat 09-Mar-19 14:06:48

Such as my delight at finding a valuable item ( charity thread ) online, then she'd asked if the proceeds went to charity. That was plain uncalled for especially when there were others who'd had twice the amount in bargains but weren't approached.
Why single me out ?

Cherrytree59 Sat 09-Mar-19 14:05:20

I have been on GN since 2015.
I had only been on GN for a short while when I ventured on to a political thread like a mouse wandering to a lions den and was duly stamped upon.
I would probably have thought at that moment that GN wasn't for me.
However a GNer (on this thread) 'stood up for me' and told the couple of posters that they were rude and out of order.
The posters in question have since left GN.

As in life we all come from different back grounds with political and religious (or non religious) beliefs.
Where GN is different is that in RL I have no idea what many friends and neighbour's religious or political stance are, as we have chosen not to divulge or enquire.

Sometimes I feel that some political posters become almost evangelical and rather just put their point across they are on a mission to change peoples minds whilst stamping their feet and banging the table.grin

I have learned a great deal from many threads on GN both serious and light hearted.

No I don't think Gransnet has changed for the worse.
Like all things in life GN is evolving
Posters come and go.
Politics and issues move on,
life does not stand still.

EllanVannin Sat 09-Mar-19 14:02:39

It seems ironic to think that most of my terse replies/posts are written by the very person who introduced this thread !!

Urmstongran Sat 09-Mar-19 13:53:37

Oops born !

Urmstongran Sat 09-Mar-19 13:53:06

And thanks to you too Sussexgran it means a lot for my opinion to be validated.
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Urmstongran Sat 09-Mar-19 13:51:38

I’m happy to recall I agreed with your views about Indy2 paddyann and that you thanked me at the time.
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Urmstongran Sat 09-Mar-19 13:49:59

Thank you for noticing that 1inamillion it is much appreciated.
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Charleygirl5 Sat 09-Mar-19 13:20:13

Sussexborn to be honest, I was livid because it was a slip of my finger. I had a superb Scottish education at a Catholic boarding school. The nuns would be horrified to know I had made one small mistake. I was an A grade pupil being around in the days of the 11+ which meant I automatically took the Latin, physics and chemistry route.

Admittedly I was promised a shiny brand new Raleigh bike if I achieved an A grade, That was why I went the extra mile!

Jane10 I totally agree with you.

I hope there were no spelling or grammatical errors!

Jane10 Sat 09-Mar-19 13:06:06

Paddyann, obviously we disagree on Scottish Independence but I'd always defend your right to say what you think and not be driven off the site.

Charleygirl5 Sat 09-Mar-19 13:05:39

paddyann I wonder if that woman would have had the guts to say that to your face? I find that abhorrent.

I am a whining Scot living in London but thankfully not in the gutter. I agree, ignoring that is the best thing to do.

Sussexborn Sat 09-Mar-19 13:01:49

I was disappointed, though not too surprised, when Urmstongran’s thread was hijacked! Some of the posts border on trolling and it is sad that people are so desperate for attention that they are oblivious to anyone’s feelings but their own.

I guess they are the sort of people who used to write poison pen letters but they now have a wider audience to try and bully. Certain posters are so predictable that I don’t bother to read their diatribes as they are tedious and boring.

It did make me laugh when someone said they had received a PM correcting their spelling though, on reflection, it could have had a serious impact on an insecure person who wasn’t lucky with their education.

paddyann Sat 09-Mar-19 13:00:18

After I posted about Scottish Independence I had a vile private msg from a woman who told me "you whining scots need to be grateful for us English giving you our money ,you'd all be living in the gutter without us" .I didn't reply to her I thought ignoring her was all she deserved.I did however decide to exit from the site and said so on the thread.I had at least a dozen messages from other grans saying dont let anyone chase you away as sometimes you say what we are thinking and we love to read your comments.So I'm still here .There are one or two posters I avoid at all costs though .

1inamillion Sat 09-Mar-19 12:44:38

I've been a member of GN for a couple of years and read a wide variety of threads. I've only posted during the last six months or so and this on a limited amount of threads. I enjoy reading other people's opinions including those who differ from mine and am amazed at the knowledge of many GN's. I have learned such a lot.
I have noticed an increase in nasty, personal comments though mcem. It is so sad and totally unnecessary.
Urmstongran, your thread was indeed hijacked sadly.