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I lost my lovely husband of 40 years suddenly and unexpectedly last autumn. He was suffering from pneumonia and had to me taken to a hospital an hour's drive from home because our local hospital - 2 miles away - has no in-patient beds any more. He found his last few days very difficult because he couldn't communicate his needs to the staff, most of whom spoke very poor English. He died alone because nobody communicated with me in his last hours, they just left a message on my answerphone. I will never cease to think of him, to miss him, to talk to him but I am keenly aware of how much our little grand-daughter misses him and he should still be here with us if better care had been taken of him...

My mother has a condition called Progressive Subnuclear Palsy. It took a lot of nagging and persistence (18 months) to get a diagnosis. Our local conservative MP Roger Gale was exceptional in helping my dad fast track mums PIP application. Once diagnosed Thanets health and social care support of mum has been pretty good (my dad is full time carer). The only problem we had was with the continence nurse, fortunately mum and dad are in a position to afford to buy them but she was quite addement mum wasn't getting themwhilst the GP made it sound like it was gonna be straightforward yes once the nurse saw mum. Lack of communication between care givers. All the care mum has received has been good- just wish there was a bit more.

My GP surgery had a feedback page on its website, which I have used to give them the praise they justly deserve. I cannot fault the care my late husband and I have been given and my second husband is amazed at how efficient and user friendly/patient orientated the practice is compared to the shambles he was used to before. However our local hospital let my late husband down every time he was admitted. He was dying from a rare lung disease and was on oxygen 24 hours a day. Without it he became agitated, confused and extremely anxious. He was admitted to an ENT ward to try and stop an unrelenting nosebleed and they actually rang me in the small hours to go and calm him down, he had been given an ambulatory oxygen cylinder to go to the toilet which had run out and nobody noticed his blue lips! I was so angry when I arrived to see him in such unnecessary distress. The attitude seemed to be that they thought his oxygen dependence was akin to alcohol dependence and he should pull himself together! They knew he was dying, I made a point of giving them a copy of his living will, drawn up by the palliative care consultant. This was some years ago to be fair and I was unaware of any feedback routes, I certainly would have given it had I known.

My partner is 72 and due to ongoing health concerns has to access many different types of departments within the NHS and, the numerous clinics, which now seem to have been sold out to private enterprise. His experiences have all been highly satisfactory and this quality care has certainly enabled him to live a healthier life. He is strong minded, vocal and mentally sound. For those who are vulnerable and can't fight their own corner (or have a family who can) then I think it would be a totally different story.
I wish it was easier to provide feedback as he would love to have been able to give very positive feedback with ease.

I try to, but there's not always the opportunity, so that means unfortunately it's generally only bad feedback that gets shared.

In our local hospital they have "postcards" where you write your thoughts good or bad and post them in the box provided which then go to the Matron apparently.

We also have the same system at the GPs, but not so easy to find.

You will always find that people are more likely to complain than praise, just the way it is.

Suffering from a mental illness is really difficult to me and my husband. Also, my son and friend do too. Care and support is very thin, and often at the first sign of you coping it is withdrawn, but often this is a crucial time as it is easy to slip backwards.
Our GP is understanding, yet there have been times when I have needed to see him about several different problems, only to be told that we can only discuss ONE problem per consultation. It is hard to get appointments and now that they have started a drop in, sitting for hours at a surgery waiting to be seen is stressful, and when you do not feel well seems forever. I see the reasoning but surely there should be some other way.
Also, there is never any water available at the surgery, which I would have thought would be provided due to the long waiting time.

I will often leave feedback when given the option to do so, but, sad to say, this is rarely positive feedback on great services as nearly every time I try to access a service there are problems. I often feel filling out feedback forms is just a waste of time as nothing changes and if anything I fear that my next appointment will be even worse if I have left negative comments and/or complaints. Everything from being messed about with appointment times, turning up to be told it is cancelled/running late, or doctors/consultants that just don't listen, don't act, don't seem to care. For example, my two most recent visits to hospital were just a waste of my days. I was kept waiting for hours on both. The first of these two appointments and the doctor left me in a chair for 20 minutes, ignoring me, checking his computer and discussing on the phone another patient, then dismissing me like a naugthy schoolchild! The second appointment I got about 60 seconds to voice my case, was totally ignored and ushered out of the door with the comment "well, you seem to be OK as maintaining weight" (I weighed 5 stone give or take a pound or two) - I look awful, feel worse and just wanted to cry that any doctor thinks a woman my age at this weight is 'OK' - I'm not - I'm seriously concerned about my health - I do not have an eating disorder (another terrible assumption that is thrown at me like an accusation). No action is ever taken, no letters receive a reply, and I am still ill but at a loss of how to get any help. This is just a small example - every time is a horror story - it is hard enough for me to get to a hospital or the doctor and long-term limbo is a bad place to be - very depressing.

The CQC simply doesn't work , A few years ago I was working in a Nursing home, unknown to me it wasn't even registered neither was the owner , she had no qualifications at all . I worked days and one day after a long weekend I went back to work , to find one of the old residents tied to a radiator she had burns all down her side where she had been held by bindings against it ( apparently she was making too much trouble and wandering out of her room ) . I rang for an ambulance and only after the lady had been taken from the building did I leave . I wrote down everything I had seen , made some observations about the way the home was run and then took everything to the CQC . I then gave them a verbal statement . I resigned from my job the CQC didn't actually find the owner guilty of anything The result ..The old lady died in hospital as a result of her injuries . The owner of the Home turned it into a Bed and Breakfast , all the remaining residents moved to accredited Nursing homes . I was unable to get a job in the next nursing home I applied in , not because I didn't have the necessary qualifications , but because I had been a Whistle Blower .

The Patients Association haven’t described the complaint system as dishonest for no reason, it’s because that’s the way it was designed from the outset. Hansard spills the beans: when the Parliamentary & Health Service Ombudsman was first set up in 1967 Parliament decided that a fair and honest system would make the government a hostage to fortune, so instead they opted for a system that was described as a “fraud” in order to con the public into thinking that their complaints would get a fair hearing. The reality is that by their own admission the PHSO rejects 99% of all complaints, 98% of them without even investigating.

“The Bill was always drafted to be a swiz, and now it is spelt into the Bill…………Anyone who contemplates an office of this kind is faced with the dilemma of making it either a Frankenstein or a nonentity—a Frankenstein if it has effective powers and a nonentity if it has not. The Government, quite rightly, has opted for its being a nonentity, and in that sense it is a fraud……… I congratulate the Government on its being a nonentity. A Frankenstein would, I think, have undermined the power of Ministers......”

Hansard, 24th January 1967

My father died in 2010 . He was in a EMI nursing home outside of Dorking (village name begins with the letter W) for some time suffering from Alzheimer's . Having worked as a registered nurse in a care home elsewhere, I was probably more able than my family to see this home's bad points. I didn't complain because I knew my Mother would be unhappy about me doing so.
One of the nurses said right in front of Dad that he was incapable of knowing or understanding anything and did not know what food was anymore. I was really cross but again said nothing.
The lounge area was very uninviting and no effort seemed to be made to engage the clients in activities or conversation.
Yes, I should have complained but didn't.

We are an older couple who attempt to be as independent as possible and try to keep out of our doctor's surgery if we can only seeking treatment when really necessary (apart that is from annual nurse reviews that are required for a couple of chronic conditions of mine).
With our surgery's system one can no longer ring and book an appointment. However, a call to reception will trigger a response from our own doctor (usually) within a couple of hours, who then either offers advice or in most cases has fit us in later that same day. When the system first came into effect we were somewhat apprehensive but now find that the days of sitting in a crowded waiting room with those troubled by coughs, colds, infections, etc. seem to have been all but eliminated (must be healthier for the staff too). We really hope that we will have the good fortune for this situation to continue and that we can care for ourselves in future years.

We are an older couple who attempt to be as independent as possible and try to keep out of our doctor's surgery if we can only seeking treatment when really necessary (apart that is from annual nurse reviews that are required for a couple of chronic conditions of mine).
With our surgery's system one can no longer ring and book an appointment. However, a call to reception will trigger a response from our own doctor (usually) within a couple of hours, who then either offers advice or in most cases has fit us in later that same day. When the system first came into effect we were somewhat apprehensive but now find that the days of sitting in a crowded waiting room with those troubled by coughs, colds, infections, etc. seem to have been all but eliminated (must be healthier for the staff too). We really hope that we will have the good fortune for this situation to continue and that we can care for ourselves in future years.
There have been odd occasions when something relatively minor occurs when we don't feel that things have been dealt with quite as we would have wished or deemed wise but are reluctant to sour relations between us and the surgery staff - I think this is the case with many older people.

After Christmas, my Aunt who is suffering from Alzheimer's became a resident of a very reputable care home. The home had been recommended to us by other members in the parish of my Aunt's local Church, and has proved to have been an excellent choice.
The staff at the home are well trained and the care given is consistently of a high standard. My Aunt is looked after, and is cared for with respect, gentleness, kindness, understanding and compassion.
For me it is very hard to criticize the care givers, because when anyone leaves their loved one in a vulnerable place or environment, it is because they need the extra time and help which because of work commitments or other reasons we as a family could not give my Aunt.
What other options are available to them?
The staff at the care home that my Aunt resides at do an extremely difficult job and take a pride in their work. I do believe however, that they are not paid enough for the job that they do in my humble opinion.
Thank you

I've been lucky enough only to have positive experiences that I am ready to gush about on social media. I think people do tend to appreciate feedback, whether good or bad, and from friends or those well trusted is important.

Would think one reason for people not sharing on social media is the fact it's a very personal subject.
Confess I have not given any feedback, would not know the correct official place to do so.Think official place to leave feedback could be publicised more widely.

Personally I would never give feedback because it will and is held against you and is thus a very dangerous thing to do. In the case of my mother I can only hope that alzheimers has rendered her sufficiently immune. There is a saying "It's a grand life if you don't weaken" never a truer word.
The word care appears to have disappeared from the vocabulary of this country services are being deliberately run down, but anyone who believes private care is any better is deluding themselves all it does is deplete your assets and take the home you managed to secure in your working life.
Suffice to say don't get ill and if you do make your own arrangements for a dignified end.

my mum is in a home has been for a great many years.
Since it was taken over from the council years ago things deteriorated and I have too many complaints to list.
I am constantly bringing these to the attention of the home and social services who pay for her care.
Some times I prove these complaints but I don't feel enough was done.
At one review I challenged what was being said by another care person only minutes before on my entering the home ...in the end I asked for the person to come to answer my questions...the care worker at the review did go off to find him never to return, only a message to say he was in a meeting...So the review was never finished we were left in my mother's room waiting until the social worker left!!!!
At the moment social services seem to be doing something to help and a very pleasant person is dealing with it all and ringing me to keep me informed.
I went up in December to sort it out, and it is now April, but I do believe they are over loaded with work and with few other places to put their clients and under great pressure trying to please their client and relatives within the law, so I do try to understand.
I would like my 95 year old mother moved to a home nearby so that I can visit her often and keep an eye on her care.... she says she wants to die there and doesn't want to move ..although I do tell her its a residendial home not a nursing home which she needs ...but there is the county border to consider as well as higher home care fees along with legal restrictions, no power of attorney, and "has she got capacity" which is proving to be a nightmare.
I feel so guilty about not visiting her often as she asks me too when I do go the 60 miles, but I am now older than she was when she went into the home. It is so frustrating.
I did put a message into the CQC many years ago, not an official complaint as I was worried it might backfire on my mum and her care.

My Dad was in hospital for two months at the end of his life. I found his care was as good as the staff that were working on that day. There was one nurse in particular who treated him like a person, he spoke to Dad and they had regular banter. He didnt mind how many times my Dad needed help and always spoke to us when we went to visit. He even came to Dads funeral, bless him. Some nurses, especially the night nurses, gave medication without speaking to Dad properly. He unfortunately got confused and the staff didnt have the time or patience to help him. I find it strange that prisoners in jail are force fed, if they refuse to eat, but no one would help my Dad eat or drink in hospital. Then he had to be placed on a drip because he got dehydrated.

If my Dad was staying in our local hospital (which is still standing and quite new, but shut down) then his family could have spent much more time with him, which would ultimately have helped the staff too.

I would just like to add that most of the staff did exceptionally well under very difficult circumstances.

My mother is in End of Life care and has received very good care in her home from a team comprised of her GP; community nurses; Macmillan nurse; social worker and care workers. I have written to her team to thank them and also left a message on the 'feedback' portal on the GP's website.

When mum was in hospital she was a very difficult patient and most of the team dealt with her with patience and good humour, but there were many times when she felt very isolated and alone. With limited resources I don't see what good complaining about the latter would do.

My elderly father has dementia and it took me some time to find the right home for him. The first one was awful, he went missing more than once, always looked scruffy and whatever I bought him disappeared after one wash despite having his name in. At one point they were responsible for taking their own washing to the laundry room - hello,he is old and can't remember anything! The last straw was when the bone idle 'carers' replaced all his underwear with an.old ladies knickers. Unfortunately I was scared to complain too much in case it impacted further on him which I think bothers many people. Thankfully the new home is much nicer

I went to a conference right at the beginning of the CQC 's remit to inspect GP surgeries. They were asking US what needed to be checked, because they had no idea what we did.
I'm not sure that has changed much, frankly. It was a solution to a non problem. There has now been total function creep and inspections are a farce.
No, I wouldn't give feedback. I do not believe that anyone would listen unless it fulfilled at pre existing prejudice. Sorry.

Why haven't we done surveys? Usually because we aren't asked! My Dad, 90 and living with us with advanced dementia, went into respite for us to go to France on holiday for 2 weeks last summer. We visited the care home and it seemed fine, if the building being a bit unfit for purpose with lots of odd, confusing corridors and stairs here and there. My dad reported good food whilst there but I can't be sure. All I know is that they lost his personal wheelchair, taken from his room and taken to another home. Although they admitted liability immediately it took 4 months to get the cash back from buying a replacement. They lost half his name-labelled clothes and 2 other visits to collect them resulted in us refusing to take other peoples labelled clothing or odd stuff! We just wanted what we'd sent him with! Unfortunately we gave up and have never heard since f they've been found. It didn't seem to bother them that the residents wore each others clothes or used their toiletries but to me that meant a loss of human dignity! We told the social worker on the phone but she never said she'd do/inform anyone and it felt like we were being petty. 2 months later Dad passed away so we never had to get into a position of deciding a new respite place, but it wouldn't have been there and quite possibly we wouldn't have bothered. Did anyone ask us to do a survey or comment on his visit formally? No! Would I have done so, yes I would!
Additionally I have my own disabilities and have a care package from the local council. Initially I had a care agency in; staff turned up when they wanted, routes meant girls had no time to do anything as travel wasn't included but they were sent from one side of the city through busy traffic to the other without a thought of travel times, one "girl" even turned up with shorts on so short her arse-cheeks were visible and when she bent over I saw more boobs than she saw on me naked! Was I ever asked for feedback? No. Did I complain, yes but it made no difference. So I changed to hiring my own Personal Assistants (PAs), although I only found about this scheme accidentally. This was much better as I had control over who came and when. However the agency who does the payroll is worse than useless and yet the contract is only with them. Does anyone ask, occasionally, but nothing changes, just shoulders shrugged and "yeah Ive heard that"!
I know care giving is difficult- I was a paid carer for a local authority for 4 1/2 years, but treating people with care and respect, obligatory and regular training to increase standards and support and information for carers all needs much improvement. But will anyone listen and make any changes? Doubtful!

I once suspected I had breast cancer and had a very bad experience with my profoundly patronising, humiliating and unhelpful GP.
When I complained to the practice, even the reception staff clearly knew about my issue.

Feel the surveys change nothing. Purely a "tick box" exercise.
Sad but true.

YES THEY BE A FEW I THANK