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Style & beauty

Faded beauty

(54 Posts)
Luckylegs9 Sat 12-Nov-16 16:01:50

I just don't recognise that person in the mirror now, it is hard coming to terms with the fact that heads do not turn any more and the worse thing is I am now called dear or sweetheart when in shops as if I am not seen as a person anymore. I do my best and I suppose I look as good as I can for my age, but I can see why people give cosmetic procedures a go to hold on to youth a bit, I am just too nervous about it.

Lupin Sun 13-Nov-16 10:50:34

You probably look a lot better than you think.It sounds as if you were a looker, and if so, probably have good bone structure which will still show. Lots of us, as evidenced above, spent a lot of angst over our looks when young and look at photos taken then and wonder what we were worried about. Same for now. My advice is to take your glasses off/contacts out when you look in the mirror. It does wonders for the state of the housework too.
Cosmetic procedures don't last very long and don't really work.
A well known lady was on Dancing with the Stars a few years ago and she looked unnatural with her frozen face.

rozina Sun 13-Nov-16 11:18:10

Dear Luckylegs 9,

I no longer turn heads at 68, but take joy in other things in life. I still colour my hair and it's gone a rather nice shade of purple (quite by accident as a chemical reaction). No exaggeration, I must have had hundreds of people stop me and say how much they like it. It's not a purple rinse as people have but a very strange dark brown shining purple in different light. Also people have commented on my very old winter coat, how much they like the style, colour etc. Take a few things in your life and turn them around and take an interest in other people too, this will lift your spirits.

fifeywifey Sun 13-Nov-16 11:29:51

Without a doubt time takes its toll but I obviously have retained the essence of my younger self. A wee while back I was stepping out of my car in a car park at the same time as this guy stepped out of his. When we looked at each other we both instantly recognised each other from 45 years ago when we last saw each other at school. He said I hadn't changed a bit which I thought was hilarious.

Mumsy Sun 13-Nov-16 11:49:31

Beauty comes from within! Ive never understood why some are so obsessed with their looks that they feel the need for surgery, botox etc. I dont give a toss if I get a second look or not, if you dont like what you see 'jog on' !

Juggernaut Sun 13-Nov-16 11:51:14

If I'd only had the confidence of today with the figure and face of my twenties I'd have been very happy indeed!
I was painfully shy as a young woman, and hated being very tall as it made me stand out in a crowd, I thought I was plain and all my friends seemed beautiful. It was only when I hit my late thirties that I suddenly realised that I wasn't ugly, being tall is a wonderful thing and women all over bleach their hair to make it look like mine!
I'm still tall, still have naturally blonde hair, but have gained a lot of weight. However, the plus side of the weight is that I look far younger than my 59 years, the fat on my face smoothes the wrinkles awaygrin
And.......I've learned the art of flirting!

Dharmacat Sun 13-Nov-16 12:30:46

I too was never pretty or slim - "plain" would have been complimentary and at 5'8" and 11 stone , wearing glasses in my last year of Junior school I always felt a freak. Gradually over the years I accepted and realised that good grooming, elegant , striking clothes plus a good haircut was the way to go.
Losing a couple of stones and , for a while, wearing contact lenses, restored some confidence. Sadly eye problems preclude contacts but smart specs, slim-long dresses, skirts and trousers , bright scarves and bold jewellery compensate for my 73 years. But yes, wish I could lessen the wrinkles and make-up seems to "enhance" them - tinted moisturiser, eye pencil and lipstick work the best.
Very sad that we are continually bombarded by the media into worshipping youthful styles and the young and beautiful with very little positive mention of the 70+ age group - no wonder we are ignored when out and about. I console myself by imagining what these egotistical young things will look like in later years.

Sheilasue Sun 13-Nov-16 13:00:31

Your not a faded beauty your an aged beauty I see many beautiful and very smart dressed woman who are aged. Every line has a history it could be sadness or great happiness. In my case when I look in the mirror I think of my son that died in 2007 he will never see me old and he will never be old.

mrsjones Sun 13-Nov-16 13:24:08

I did feel like the OP when I first started to age but now that I am 70 I am content with myself. I will never turn heads again but I did once and now it is someone else's turn. I was a bit of an ugly duckling in my teens and looked my best in my 20's & 30's.
When I was 17 I was envious of a friend who looked like Cathy McGowan but she hasn't aged well and is now more wrinkly and heavier than I am!

whitewave Sun 13-Nov-16 13:55:41

I'd be happy with faded beauty!!

Worlass Sun 13-Nov-16 16:23:36

I second what Mumsy says. I suppose I was 'average' looking, but tbh never really thought too much about it. Now, in my seventies, I look back on a long and happy marriage, a family who are doing well enough, and, fingers crossed, few health concerns. The loss of my DH continues to hurt, but I am quite contented otherwise. I don't know whether this lack of concern about fading looks on my part is because never really felt that they were too important anyway. I am still 'average' looking for my age, I think, albeit several stones heavier! smile

pauline42 Sun 13-Nov-16 17:10:54

It is what it is - this wrinkly face and crepey neck simply prove I'm nearly 75! I can't turn the clock back, I can only celebrate the fact that I am lucky to feel so healthy and be so active. Every year is a gift and I've already lived 10 years longer than my mother who often stares back at me in the reflection of a window or a mirror!

In my early 60's, whilst still earning because I was working full time, I went through a rather long phase of trying every cream and experimenting with lots of different cosmetic procedures in an attempt to hold back time - but that finished up being a ridiculous amount of work and really much too time consuming......but I don't regret the experience! Now I am at peace with the face who stares back at me when I catch an unexpected glance of myself .....wrinkles and all.

Jayh Sun 13-Nov-16 17:22:29

I too am happy with faded beauty. I see myself, courtesy of Charles Dickens, as the remains of a fine woman. Others may not agree but I care not a jot. ?

Nanna58 Sun 13-Nov-16 17:25:30

Oh Sheilasue you have so put things into perspective, who cares what we look like as long as we have our families safe and well. That's not to say let yourself go, just realise exactly where looks go on the grand scale of things. I'm sorry for your loss X

Jalima Sun 13-Nov-16 17:49:14

Me too whitewave
Although I don't look too bad until I put my spectacles on.
hmm

I think Worlass has it right.

Legs55 Sun 13-Nov-16 17:55:39

I was never a "beauty" but I was a "head turner" as I was slim, 5'7", good legs (mini skirts & hot pants were perfect for me) & long hair. I was fairly confident with my appearance but still a bit on the shy side (plenty of boyfriends though!!) hmm

Sadly these days I can no longer wear heels & weigh far too much, I am starting to feel better about myself again as I've just had 6 months with no teeth at the top (crumbling gnashers & broken denture), since having stumps removed & new denture I can smile again - new found confidence, just need a hair cut now smile

I wear little make up, mascara & lipstick as I'm allergic to many cosmetics but my nails are always varnished (& long), they have always been my pride & joy & I'm often complimented on them grin

Confidence is a must, love to look smart when I go out, wear what I like, fashion means nothing to me hmm

KatyK Sun 13-Nov-16 18:00:21

Like Legs55 I was the perfect shape for '60s clothes = tall slim, long legs - well I'm still tall grin My DH says he still sees the girl he met in 1967 when he looks at me. Perhaps a trip the the opticians is in order.

MagicWand Sun 13-Nov-16 18:25:06

Having just about bounced back from a significant attack of Bell's Palsy - it's taken the best part of 7 months - I can only say that I now look in the mirror and smile at the image that looks back - but now it's with both sides of my face!

Believe me when I say there are much worse things than wrinkles and lines e.g. NOT having wrinkles and lines. I never thought that being told my face looked 'nearly normal' would be something I would take as a compliment, but hey ho and smile on!

Luckylegs9 Sun 13-Nov-16 18:38:51

Shellasue, how vain I sound, I'm not really, lucky to have got older. I feel for losing your son much too soon, not right to lose a child and it certainly puts my vanity into perspective. Looking at the Rememberence Service last night on television and seein the young that gave their lives for the likes of me, how they would have liked to have got old. ?

MargaretX Sun 13-Nov-16 19:50:14

I didn't turn many heads but I turned one and he was handsome and still is and with him we make a handsome couple for our age but alone nobody would look twice - or even once.

Sheilasue Sun 13-Nov-16 20:21:17

Thank you nana 58 x

Sheilasue Sun 13-Nov-16 20:27:34

Your not vain luckylegs 9 we all have our moments. Yes I saw that on the television and cried for those young men only 19 can you believe it it's hear breaking. I looked at our lovely queen and saw the sorrow in her face.

She was a beauty as a young queen, and she still is now.

My son was 35 so I did get to have him for a bit longer.

hulahoop Sun 13-Nov-16 20:37:39

Sheilasue you have put things into perspective I am sorry you lost your son . I am just glad to be here I know I need to lose some weight now my health is stable .we all have things we don't like about ourselves but remember beauty comes from within a smile and cheerful personality is something we can all try to do every day ?

grannypiper Mon 14-Nov-16 05:21:04

We have aged some better than others but who cares when we can still laugh, eat things we shouldnt and drink things we really shouldnt smile At least we all look similar to our younger selves and our family and friends dont scream or ROFL when the meet us unlike some of todays "stars" Madonnas photo in the press yesterday was hilarious, line free face cheekbones like a gerbil and hands of her real age, as one of my friends commented on another friend who had just had massive breast implants at the age of 52 " perky boobs and a wrinkly face makes you look like a spitting image puppet" and i hate to say but that is exactly what she and madonna look like. Their beauty doesnt shine through as they are obviously not happy people which is such a shame.

Teddy123 Mon 14-Nov-16 08:02:01

I now have a 'rule' for anyone taking my photo. The must be at least 10ft away ...... The lines then disappear!

kittylester Mon 14-Nov-16 08:22:18

The lines don't bother me. The one good thing my mum handed down was good skin. I might have preferred my dad's good hair though!