strange perhpas- but can getting older and less good looking help in some ways?

What you've never had you never miss applies to me.

When I was at school I always preferred playing boys games: 'cowboys and indians' 'war' etc., and as I got older I had no patience with girlie meetings where it seemed they were all obsessed with makeup, body-shape, boys and later who was sleeping with whom.

In any gathering I gravitated towards the men (and was often accused of flirting) because their conversation and outlook was, to me, genuinely more interesting.

So as I really enjoy the company of men, I have far more men friends than women.
That doesn't mean every man I've gone out with, or now see, has been a friend with benefits, far from it. Most of my long-term, affectionate relationships are with mates in the platonic sense.

And how is all this relevant to the subject?

Because I have never lost my genuine interest in what makes men tick; what causes them hurt and pain; how genuinely hard it is often to be a bloke, especially in a world where PC dictates women can say pretty much what they like about men but gawd help them if they criticise us in the same way.

So although I never had any of the so-called 'sex appeal' based on looks, I have always respected and liked men.
That doesn't fade with age.

I'm sorry. I didn't read your post properly Pudding123
I agree, not nice for you at all.

I abhor married, sleazy, smarmy men just about as much.

Their poor wives.

I abhor physical violence but it did cross my mind.

A kick in the balls probably would have done the trick.

MawB, There other half 's in all instances never knew,even though the last one stalked me for over a year and wouldn't take no for an answer.

Pudding - how awful. I cat imagine anything more embarrassing or unpleasant.
Are your friends still speaking to you?

One thing I have noticed about being old(er) is that random strangers, of all ages, talk to me much more than when I was younger or even when I was middle aged.
Perhaps I look more approachable now I have more confidence.

You've definitely still got "it" Pudding. ?

This may sound big headed but it isn't meant to be.I think I was ok when I was at school very slim and nice legs but I had teenage spots and that did sap my confidence somewhat even though they looking back on photos were not that bad.I can't tell you how many times I was propositioned by friends husband's ,boyfriends and in the last 3 years have again been asked out by 2 different men both of whom were married .

Lucky you !!

I was and still am incredibly gorgeous.... but, accept that if I hear a wolf whistle it won’t be for me ???

I know exactly what you mean about 60's and 70's parenting newgran2019. I was brought up to not show off or think highly of myself. It worked too. Any chance of an opinion was met with "little girls should be seen and not heard" and this was the 70's for goodness sake.

My parents were both very prudish and my mum would have my sister and I turn our backs while she adjusted her half-slip. My mum wore no make-up except for maybe a tiny bit lipstick, she didn't use perfume or do any of the normal things a young woman in the 70's might do. the thought of having sex appeal or any mention of sex at all would have been met with absolute disapproval . I have written on GN many times in the past that my parents wrote to my school forbidding me to take part in any sex education lessons. Then they wonder why I got pregnant at 17 ?

I wonder if there is a conversation about comfortable bras. My old age will be better compensated for when I discover comfortable bras.

Gillybob, I too was 'brought up not to show off or shine in any way and would like to be able to accept a compliment'; I'm so bad at it that it's been commented on - though that was about my skill at baking fruit cakes, not my looks! What was it about parenting in the 60s/70s that made our parents act that way - or was it just a lack of confidence in themselves?

As for looks, at 56 I (normally!) look quite a bit younger than I am and quite like playing what I see as a game with time/nature to see how long it will last, but I'm not prepared to spend hours and pounds on it. As people say, one's character matters far more. I do wish my husband would appreciate me a bit more, though - not much 'romance' round here!

I was always a rather plain girl when I was young - so I got by on other qualities like being funny, being able to have a good conversation etc. I now find in my 70's that I've aged quite well, have good skin and I keep my figure OK, and do my hair nicely . I actually get more male attention now than I ever did as a girl, so maybe I'm having the last laugh ?

Not a pretty sight GabriellaG54 !

annep1
That made me laugh out loud just now. I know exactly what you mean. ?

Oh MOnica its not a bad thing to be able to fly under the radar!

I'm generally quiet, totally self absorbed and don't interact a lot with the general public. Easy to be invisible if you're not constantly communicating with others. I don't HAVE to be, I actively seek it in my personal life, as an introvert.

Work is different. I have a totally different personality in the classroom. Outgoing and dominant.

I may be older, but I am certainly not invisible. I think many older women are victims of their own belief in what people tell them about older women. Personally, I have never understood this invisibility thing.

Rosina, your situation made me laugh. My DH had a similar thing happen at his last reunion; his 40th this past June.
There was a woman who mentioned how trim and good he was looking, but backhandedly mentioned 'You used to be a bit nerdy in school". I was shocked, and he graciously let it slide.
This from a portly woman with grey frizzy hair and unfashionable glasses. I heard afterwards she was very nice looking and popular in school. I would have liked to kick her in the knee!

The best bit about being older and invisible is you can do whatever the hell you like. Mostly it goes unnoticed and if it IS noticed, people thing you're a mad old bag and dismiss you.

I’m with you Pensionpat....I peaked at 45....and now although men don’t look....I find I don’t care...it’s so liberating! I intend to enjoy the freedom from trying to conform to men’s expection!

Would hate to be thought of as Matronly! A heavyweight older woman Yuck

Its preferable to what preceeds it if you are "top heavy"

Its a relief even.