What hairspray?

Winniewit!

My hair is so wild that it needs a probation officer not a hairspray

I used to really like John Frieda hairspray, but I think it was discontinued.
Since then I have been using Schwarzkopf Got to B, Glued.
Buy in Boots or Tesco, approx 4.00 per can.
It works, but does build up a bit.
All depends how strong you need it.

I used Elnett for a while. But to be honest I don't think it did the job any better than Pantene or similar less expensive brands.

And here`s me thinking it was shredded wheat with lots of sugar.
Back to the drawing board.

Oh god his hair hahaha . Teetime that made me laugh, I find elnett extra strength keeps mine neatish in the wind. Doubt if he uses that though lol

Elnette satin extra hold?
Google says this is good, and I agree, I am growing my hair, and it is like yours, abit like a burst mattress!

Not a look any sane person would aspire to.

I thought it was super glue!

Some form of liquid acetate with industrial hardening qualities.

I love that description of your hair. Mine does exactly the same lol.