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Help, very thick bushy frizzy hair.... At a loss what to do.

(55 Posts)
seacliff Sat 12-Aug-17 13:59:16

Sorry for the essay ....The title says it all really. It was dark brown with grey, I've gradually had done dark blond/caramel highlights to blend grey, as dark brown not flattering for my skin now.

It looks awful, one big mass of frizzy, wavy hair, have tried expensive shampoos, products. Coconut oil applied at night gives it good condition, but still a mess style wise.

I have grown it to just on shoulder. I can never blow dry out straighten it to look nice, like the hairdresser does.

It is mostly one length, she said the weight would make it less bushy. Maybe it needs to be a bit longer?

She does thin it, not sure of that helps long-term. Someone said I have Italian type hair.

I don't like it short on me, I am overweight and it makes me feel unfeminine, a helmet of hair, and I then have to wash it every day to give it some bounce.

I wondered about a couple of long layers, hairdresser now don't seem to do layer cuts the same way.

Any ideas please? Just a faint hope that one of you may have similar hair. I know I'm "" lucky"" to have thick hair, but it's really not easy.

I would love a wash and go style, I want to go with my wavy hair, if only it wasn't so bushy. Thanks

Coolgran65 Sat 12-Aug-17 14:12:06

I remember someone once talking about using Affro hair products to tame their hair.
Also, if the hair is springy, it should be cut dry.

shandi6570 Sat 12-Aug-17 17:56:48

I have thick, frizzy hair, also was dark brown, now very grey. Never tried colouring it so I don't know if that is affecting your hair, however I do know from bitter experience that using thinning scissors/shears on my hair has been a disaster. This may be the root of your present problem. I always ask for a dry cut, ie. hair not washed only wetted before cutting, as coolgran says.

I do keep my hair fairly short so can't advise you about wearing it shoulder length, but I do try and only wash my hair every five to seven days as I find it dry. Also I use a shampoo/conditioner for the first wash and then a second wash with shampoo only. I leave it to nearly dry and only blow dry it for a few minutes after that.

My current hairdresser is a man, best cut I have had in years. Good luck with finding the perfect solution for you.

glammanana Sat 12-Aug-17 18:45:04

Have you tried John Frieda's Friss Ease sirum it is very good for taming down hair,my friend swears by it he does a taming shampoo & conditioner in his range as well as,try and look out for his offers in Boots/Superdrug etc when they have 3 for 2 offers and you will get a bargain.good luck.

Kateykrunch Sat 12-Aug-17 18:56:51

I bought one of the heated brushes from Superdrug, it is much quicker and easier to use than my straighteners and not as damaging to your hair. It takes me about 3 mins to smooth out my frizz and is really easy to master. I bought it when it was on offer.

Cherrytree59 Sat 12-Aug-17 19:24:31

Don't use a brush on dry hair.
try combing with a wide tooth comb.
Always comb root to tip.
This makes the cuticles lie flat.
Comb argon oil through damp hair.
If you leave hair to dry naturally it will more than likely dry frizzy.
Have you tried large rollers?

Oriel Sat 12-Aug-17 19:52:24

Have you looked into getting it chemically straightened at a good salon?

seacliff Sat 12-Aug-17 19:55:30

Thanks everyone, Shandi I agree the thinning is probably a bad idea, I will stop that, will take a while to grow out what's already been done sadly.

I have a babylis big round hot brush, which smoothes it a bit, but I want to avoid heat too much as it's bad for hair. I only shampoo every 3/4 days, I'll try conditioner only some times.

I have just got a wide comb too , as I read brushes make it more frizzy. I tried twisting long bits when wet, leave to air dry, it looked like long spirals when dry, pretty but not very neat .though.

Not tried rollers, have so much hair, it would take ages. Wondered about rag rolling. It curls easily.

Frizz ease is OK, I have tried all sorts, cupboard is full of rejected products!! I won't have it cut yet, having got this far. Not sure whether to have a couple of long layers put in it. Thanks for your ideas.

Welshwife Sat 12-Aug-17 22:14:20

What about hot oil treatment? DD has used it when her curly hair has got a bit unruly.

Luckylegs9 Sun 13-Aug-17 07:28:32

I would go for a couple of consultations at top Salons, ask their opinion on style etc. Definitely have it cut dry, maybe a long style with all the bulk is not the easiest to manage.

Luckylegs9 Sun 13-Aug-17 07:29:42

Or have it professionally straightened. A perm in reverse.

Anya Sun 13-Aug-17 07:34:28

I wash my hair every day as it's very fine and can go limp otherwise. However I found this advice on a reputable website, which might help you seacliff

How often should you really wash your hair?

Medically Reviewed by Dr Rob Hick

Opinions differ

So how often should we really wash our hair? It's not a cop-out but the correct answer is it depends on who you ask and on your own hair!

If you have fine hair it's more likely to look limp the day after a wash so you may want to wash it more frequently.

For curly and coarse hair every 3 days or so may be a better idea.

Some people find their hair is more manageable and looks better the day after they've washed it as it's too soft and floppy on the day itself.

"A good benchmark for hair washing should be twice a week or when you feel your hair needs it," says top hair consultant Scott Cornwall.

He says, "If you have very thick, long and curly hair and need to spend a considerable amount of time blow-drying or styling, a good weekly wash would suffice."

The advice is different from Marilyn Sherlock the Chairman of the Institute of Trichologists. "Wash it every day," she says. "We wash our bodies every day and clean our teeth twice a day, why should hair be any different?"
She says: "With all of the fumes from cars and pollution a daily shampoo and condition is ideal."
Hair that has been coloured or processed may need less washing as oil doesn't travel so far down the hair shaft so it tends to be more dry and need shampooing less.

Marilyn says that daily washing doesn't apply to African-Caribbean hair, "It's more porous and needs oiling so should only be washed every 2 or 3 weeks to prevent it breaking.""

Riverwalk Sun 13-Aug-17 07:58:34

Maybe borrow a ceramic hair straightener and see if you can get the hang of that.

Or investigate a Brazilian blow dry - I presume it's expensive but said to last a few months.

f77ms Sun 13-Aug-17 08:13:13

I use a straightener with copious amounts of heat protector on the ends , heat may be bad for hair but I look like a cave woman if I don`t straighten lol . Frizz ease is good for getting rid of the frizzy look . I believe a Brazilian blow dry works wonders for frizz ? not sure how much it costs . Colouring it would also help as grey hair is much more coarse . Go to a decent salon for a consultation xx

Belinda49 Sun 13-Aug-17 09:43:19

I totally sympathise as my hair sounds very much the same. When I was younger and it was long I could tie it back but now I have it jaw length and it is awful. I always ask hair stylists not to thin it as it makes it even harder to handle, but they can't seem to resist as it is so thick. I only wash it once a week, at night, and sleeping on it calms it down but the ends are always ragged. I am hoping that once I have grown out the years of colouring and am back to my mousey self the texture will be different. When we know our hair looks awful, we feel awful.

sally21 Sun 13-Aug-17 09:46:00

I don't think colouring would make grey hair less coarse would it? I have naturally curly hair - it was wonderful in the 70's when the afro was fashionable. I used to have it razor cut which really suited my hair, but no-one seems to do that now. I stopped colouring when I started to go grey - I found my hair was in better condition and easier to manage without it.

I do think the best course is to find a good hairdresser and cutter - harder than it sounds of course. Sometimes it's worth going to the salon a couple of weeks after a cut to show them where it isn't working. Concentrate on getting the cut right before you add colour to the mix. Don't expect an overnight miracle. Ask them to gradually get your hair into a shape that suits. There's nothing worse than coming out of the hairdressers and wanting to hide from the world.

Good luck. Live with the curl - don't fight it.

Persistentdonor Sun 13-Aug-17 09:50:56

I have started using one drop of Argan hair oil every day.
I wet my hands and apply the oil on damp hair as I find it moves around more easily that way.

Persistentdonor Sun 13-Aug-17 09:53:48

p.s. I am sure a sodium free shampoo would be a big help too.

Esspee Sun 13-Aug-17 09:57:22

Your hairdresser does it well so ask his/her advice on how you can maintain it and if there is any other style that would be easier for you to manage.
If you can afford it make a weekly appointment and stop trying to do it yourself. Only having it washed once a week is not unusual and probably easier on the hair condition.
Finally do ask them about length. Few people our age suit long hair. Good luck.

JanaNana Sun 13-Aug-17 09:57:44

I have similar type of hair to you....the only way I can tame it is to have it short and layered....too heavy to wear longer... ..even when I was a lot younger I could"nt do anything with it.. ..too heavy to wear up ...too wild-woman worn down. I resigned myself in the end to keeping it short. On the plus side it is very easy to maintain just wash it daily and dry naturally. I can"t let it go longer than six weeks between cuts though as it has its own mind. I appreciate the simplicity of it short now than when I was a lot younger.....definitely wash and go.

Chimaera Sun 13-Aug-17 10:12:36

If you want straight hair a Brazilian blow dry would do the trick?

Teetime Sun 13-Aug-17 10:22:57

Hallo seacliff and all frizzy hair sufferers. I am a brunette going grey, very very thick hair and very very curly. I have it coloured every four weeks. yesterday I went to a new hairdresser who gave me a wonderful cut where she took out the bulk without using thinning scissors which I wont have on my hair anyway as it makes it far far worse. Sometimes you need a change of hairdresser I think they stop 'seeing' you after a while. So now I use Frizz Ease shampoos Dream Curls and Extraordinary Oil to style it and do it about every three days. I only comb it in between styling no brushing which gives it even more static. I blow dry the top and fringe and scrunch dry the sides and back otherwise I would be there all day.
I have seen a number of silk pillows around and may try one of those too.
I have tried Keratin shampoos but they tend to weight the hair down after a few applications and its hard to get all the product out of your hair so I would go down the Bralian blow dry root - it can make the hari very dry and brittle.
Good nutrition is important to for your hair too.
I think this kind of hair will always be hard work but it can look so nice when done properly. Good luck with trying out some of these suggestions.

harrysgran Sun 13-Aug-17 10:26:04

I bought a ceramic heat brush it leaves my hair frizzy free and I find it much easier to use than straighteners

blueberry1 Sun 13-Aug-17 10:27:21

Your hair sounds exactly like mine-yes we are told how lucky we are to have thick,curly tresses!I have found that layering is much better than having it thinned.Have you thought about keeping the length at the back and having the front sections layered so that it is less full around the front hairline?I also recommend argan oil,applied on damp hair,just a couple of drops spread onto damp fingers and run through the hair-it smells lovely too.

WilmaKnickersfit Sun 13-Aug-17 10:58:49

I too would recommend getting a good pair of ceramic straighteners.

My friend's neighbour is a hairdresser and said once you try a good set of straighteners, you'll see such a difference - they're not all the same. You don't need to pay gdh prices, I have a Babyliss set that cost me about £40 a few years ago. Don't bother too much trying to blow dry a style when it's shoulder length, but do use a good heat protection spray before you dry. Then use it again on each section of hair as you straighten it. Don't use mousse or anything else except the protection spray. I use Tresemme Care & Protect UV heat Defence Styling Spray. Always use conditioner, but not the leave in kind (unless you are treating yourself to a treatment). Use a finishing product if you want your hair to look especially nice, or if you're prepared to wash your hair more often, because your hair will get greasy more quickly (even dry hair gets greasy with product).

I have found that this method lasts several days (I too am overweight and trying to get a more flattering style).

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