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Unsafe to drive?

(118 Posts)
middleagespread Thu 28-Apr-16 11:04:30

I have a dear friend but we only meet as members of the same group. The subject of his driving has been, over the last couple of years , much discussed but not directly with him. As we all car share then it has become apparent that no one will share with this lovely man because of his erratic, sometimes dangerous driving. We all offer to drive and he says he gets it,he understands that no one will drive with him. However last night he came to a meeting and left his car outside, keys in engine running! A neighbour told us. I left before it came to light. We are seriously worried for him and other motorists but what can we do. He lives alone and relies on his car and won't accept our so far 'Joking' comments.

FarNorth Fri 29-Apr-16 20:36:39

Why not have a chat with his doctor then (seriously) and spell out your fears for the man and the general public?
How great will it be for his 2 young children if the worst does happen?

I suppose everyone, including the doctor, is thinking it's not their problem if he ignores what he has been told.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 20:30:50

His GP is fully aware. Not wanting to drive at night is fine- as long as you don't - as it were.

Jalima Fri 29-Apr-16 20:23:12

But you could just have a chat with his GP and he/she could take it from there surely?

I am 70 and I do not like driving in the dark
There, I've said it at last after 52 years of driving.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 20:19:36

The Maire knows, the Councillors know- everyone here.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 20:19:07

I know- but I don't think I could. About 40, father os 2 young children and a builder by trade. Thing is, his doctor knows he is driving- and of course if he had an accident and hurt (or worse) someone- his epilepsy is on his medical records- so his insurance would be invalidated, and he would face criminal charges. So hard.

janeainsworth Fri 29-Apr-16 20:16:53

Or his GP, as you were telling someone else upthread?

Ana Fri 29-Apr-16 20:16:18

Yes, or perhaps you could have a word with his GP...

FarNorth Fri 29-Apr-16 20:13:38

If you know that for a fact about your neighbour, granjura, why do you not report him to the police?
It's not very lovely of him to risk other people's lives.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 19:40:28

Well that is wonderful Charleygrl- but ot be fair, your intitial post seemed to indicate clearly that your not wanting to drive at night or on unfamiliar roads was linked to your macular degeneration, eg your eyesight. Hope you will see that if you re-read your post. If your sight is not affected by the MD- then that is wonderful- and long may it be so.

But when and if it does, I hope you get the necessary advice and make the necessary adjustments. Having had a fil, my mum and my dad, all 3 drive far beyond the time they should have stopped- and who were a danger to themselves, but much more importantly to others (the subject of this thread after all)- then I think sometimes relatives, friends, doctors, etc- have to have the guts to say NO- you mustn't drive anymore. Fil died getting out of his drive of a heart attack- after being told many times he shouldn't drive. He could have easily had the heart attack a couple of miles down the road instead, or on the M25 going to pick up someone from Heathrow. My young neighbour has been told he musn't drive due to his epilepsy, and he drives his truck every day- lovely guy, but ...

wot Fri 29-Apr-16 19:01:58

flowers

pompa Fri 29-Apr-16 18:52:39

Sorry if I appeared mean to Ganjura, was not intended. flowers

wot Fri 29-Apr-16 18:22:12

Don't be mean to Grandura; I'm sure she had your best interests at heart. Sorry to poke my nose in....not.

Charleygirl Fri 29-Apr-16 18:19:02

I have never liked to drive on unfamiliar roads from the day I passed my test so many years ago. It is zilch to do with my eyesight. I do not have any black spots affecting my eyes. Being the law abiding citizen that I am, I informed the DVLA immediately although I am well aware that I did not have to do it. I have never had an accident but I am not a fan of driving and never have been. That does not mean that I should not be driving.

pompa Fri 29-Apr-16 18:11:16

I would hope that the optician would advise when it is time to report any deterioration to the DVLA.

phoenix Fri 29-Apr-16 17:47:35

Just to add my whatever pennyworth the phrase is, I'm 57, wear glasses but no actual eye condition as such, and do everything I can to avoid driving in the dark. It's not too bad in towns with street lights, but on the roads around here I find it very stressful.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 17:05:06

And that is wonderful Pompa, and long may it last. But as you say you have not noticed a difference, and it has not affected the way you drive, etc- and you are getting tests regularly- then it is great. Macular degeneration does not stop you driving- but if you clearly notice that it is affecting how, where and when you drive- then you have to think carefully about what next and get professional advice, fill the form to DVLA, etc. To protect yourself, and others - however great the inconvenience to self.

pompa Fri 29-Apr-16 16:54:40

I have the early stages of AMD in one eye, but do not have any blind spots and my eyesight has not deteriorated. My prescription has change only slightly over the last 5 years . My AMD was only spotted during a hospital retinal examination following viscous detachment. I now have annual eye tests and it has not become any more advanced.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 16:32:13

It's actually from the www.gov.uk site:

Macular degeneration and driving

You can be fined up to £1,000 if you don’t tell DVLA about a medical condition that affects your driving. You may be prosecuted if you’re involved in an accident as a result.
Car or motorcycle licence
If macular degeneration only affects one eye

You don’t need to tell DVLA if you’re still able to meet the ‘visual standards for driving’.
If macular degeneration affects both eyes

You must tell DVLA if macular degeneration affects both your eyes. Fill in form V1 and send it to DVLA. The address is on the form.

A driver was recently jailed for killing a pedestrian when affected by macular degenaration and declared unfit to drive- but continued to do so.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 16:24:51

Of course Charelygirl- I do NOT know the extent of your symptoms at all. But your comments about not wanting to drive at dusk and on unfamiliar road is exactly what my mother said and did, for too long. We knew, but no-one dared challenge her with it.

We were fortunate that her accident, although it wrote the car off, didn't injur her or others. Your own comments indicate that you know your vision is impaired- otherwise you wouldn't have mentioned it. I sincerely hope you are having tests regularly to assess the degree of black spots- and will know when the time has come. Is all I am saying- as your comments are a real indication of impairment. I so hope you will be able to drive as long as you safely can- ande wish you all the very best. But driving and being aware things are 'not quite right' - is for me a total no. I can't drive at the moment because of my knee replacement and we live in a rural area- so I am fully aware of how inconvenient and upsetting it can be to have to give up- I can assure you.

The info re fine is from the DVLA website.

Charleygirl Fri 29-Apr-16 16:18:23

I forgot to mention Granjura that my insurance company for the car is more than happy. As said before you are in no position to tell me to get off the road. I have no idea where you found out that the DVLA fine people when AMD is causing symptoms. I have been tested by the DVLA, not that it is any of your business.

granjura Fri 29-Apr-16 16:09:22

So sorry jane and Charleygirl- but macular degeneration means you have blind spots- and if a child runs into the road- it can make ALL THE DIFFERENCE- truly.

I take absolutely no pleasure in saying this, really. I can so well imagine how much I'd absolutely hate to give up driving. My mum waited a bit too long when she suffered from macular degenaration- she ended up off the road and into a garage- no harm done to anyone- but she knew she just had to give up.

It really depends on degree of damage, but not wating to drive at dusk or on unfamiliar road indicates a lack of confidence and awareness of the problem which will, at some point, indicate that a line has been crossed:

How can having macular degeneration
affect my driving?

Macular degeneration can distort your central vision and can lead to loss of sharp vision. Macular degeneration also can make it difficult to see road signs, traffic, and people walking, and may affect your ability to drive safely.

Can I still drive with a macular degeneration?

If your eye care expert has told you that you have macular degeneration, there are certain things that you should know and do to stay a safe driver.

People experience the visual effects of macular degeneration in different ways. In the early stages of macular degeneration, you may only have small central areas of vision loss or distortion that may not affect your driving. In fact, you may not even notice any change in your eyesight. As macular degeneration progresses, it may become harder for you to see clearly. This may make you worry about your vision and make it harder to drive safely.

The DVLA will fine people who drive once macular degenaration is causing symptoms £1000- and of course insurance including liability to 3rd parties will be void. So not to be taken lightly. And as said, I take no pleasure in insisting on this point, at all.

FarNorth Fri 29-Apr-16 16:06:29

Yes, middleagespread, the time for 'joking' is over.
I hope your friend can realise the dangers of continuing to drive and will understand that he is not able to do it safely, nowadays.

sweetcakes Fri 29-Apr-16 15:29:11

My Mil has just given up she lost confidence after having cataracts done but the point she made was by the time she saved money on insurance mot tax petrol and of course the sale of the car she had a tidy sum to put by in her taxi bank every one happy especially my DH, yes giving up can be a pain but at some point you have to be realistic

middleagespread Fri 29-Apr-16 10:39:29

This is such a good idea for so many people and I shall consider it when I lose confidence. Maybe losing confidence is an indication that one is doubting ones skills? Regarding my good friend, one of us is going to speak kindly but firmly today advising him of lots of options as advised by Gransnet members.
Thanks all, and I shall continue monitoring the feedback, it's so useful.

janeainsworth Thu 28-Apr-16 23:25:03

Quite, Charleygirl.
If a child or animal runs out in front of you without warning, it makes no difference whether you have some macular deneration or perfect 20/20 vision.
A woman and two children ran across the A66 - a dual carriageway - right in front of me once.
By the grace of God I didn't hit them, but my car left black tyre marks along the road. It was the most frightening experience I have ever had.
I had perfect vision at the time.