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So called professionals and they way they talk about clients

(38 Posts)
eazybee Wed 04-Mar-20 09:34:19

You should have challenged it in the meeting or privately, with the person concerned.
You should not be discussing it on an open forum; look above at some of the disclosures it is engendering.
Most unprofessional.

GagaJo Wed 04-Mar-20 09:33:20

Hahahahaha!!!!! I'm from Norfolk. I LOVE that acronym!

I think what people say VERBALLY (not put into writing) should be taken with a pinch of salt. Some of the roles involving the vulnerable are very stressful. Sounding off or making distasteful (NOT bigoted, that is different) jokes is a way of dealing with stress.

I have many times stormed into a staff room ranting, 'That little f**ker! I'm going to kill him.' Then next lesson, I'm back to calm, ready to deal with his behaviour and needs because I've had a safe space to rant in. Yes, in front of my manager at times.

We are human. If someone is letting off steam, I feel it is unreasonable to judge them. IF they are passing this onto their students/clients/vulnerable people, that is entirely different.

Luckygirl Wed 04-Mar-20 09:29:56

Her expression was crude and inelegant - but hopefully only said within a closed confidential team meeting. She may be right that this family need contraceptive advice to help them to plan their family and this should be something under discussion if appropriate.

She could have chosen her words better.

But sometimes stressed professionals let off steam with a rather quirky sense of humour - I know - I was married to a doctor, and you should hear what they sometimes say! But at the same time the professional approach to the patients was impeccable.

TrendyNannie6 Wed 04-Mar-20 09:27:02

Nothing surprises me nowadays, but not very professional thing to say, whether she thought it or not,

MerylStreep Wed 04-Mar-20 09:19:52

Neither shocked or surprised. I think the only time I was 'shocked' was when a social worker friend was moving some residents from a residential home to another county.
NFN was written at the top of their notes. My friend had never seen this before so she asked what is this
In case some of you don't know it's Normal for Norfolk.
She saw far worse written on notes when she was involved in the closure of Severalls Hospital ( Colchester)

M0nica Wed 04-Mar-20 08:48:35

Quite beyond the pale. Apart from anything else how can this client family get unbiassed and good support if a person doing this has the mind set that permits her to make remarks like this.

Mapleleaf Wed 04-Mar-20 08:38:12

Perhaps the manager spoke to the individual later in private? (Which would be more discrete than your colleague appeared to be).

travelsafar Wed 04-Mar-20 08:22:25

Maybe you should tell someone higher up the ladder and leave it to them to discuss with the manager as he/he is clearly not dealing with issues correctly.

Gaunt47 Wed 04-Mar-20 08:21:12

It's a crude distasteful expression. But the person using it was stating the obvious - that the family shouldn't have more children when they cannot cope with the number they already have.

grannypiper Wed 04-Mar-20 08:17:46

Highly unprofessional. Might be what she thinks and might be true but it was not her place to say it. It is your Managers place to pull her up on it.

ForestsLakesandMountains Wed 04-Mar-20 08:12:55

@aggie. thank you. reading your response, I think what is making me most angry is the fact that the manager did not challenge it

aggie Wed 04-Mar-20 08:07:29

That is a highly unprofessional remark ! However it is maybe not for you to correct , it is the place of the senior or leader of your team to take this on board and set the standard
I share your distaste

ForestsLakesandMountains Wed 04-Mar-20 07:58:31

I am part of a team of professionals working with very vulnerable children and families. In our team meeting recently one of my colleagues discussed a case - a family in great need and clearly struggling. She referred to the parents as 'they need to keep their legs closed'. This went unchallenged by anyone there including our manager. The way she has spoken about this family has made me angry. I have challenged things before at work and feel that im the only one who speaks up or discusses it with my manager and in the end this may go against me. Id like to know what other people think, am I making a big deal of this? should I learn to let things go?