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How to start the difficult conversation?

(56 Posts)
Cabbie21 Thu 30-Mar-23 16:22:44

DH knows he needs to make a new will, and make a note of his wishes, put his affairs in order. He agrees that he does need to. But nothing happens.

This is such a difficult subject.

JPB123 Sun 02-Apr-23 20:41:11

My Dad said that just because you make a will doesn’t mean you’re going to die! I had my will done with my family solicitor

SuzieHi Sun 02-Apr-23 21:36:15

POA - very easy to download forms from gov.uk and fill in yourself. You need a witness to sign to say you’re not doing under duress, and a witness for signatures. Fee is about £82 per form. Each person needs one for financial matters, one for Health & welfare

M0nica Mon 03-Apr-23 09:51:59

Notspaghetti I wasn't referring to the making the will, but the starting the conversation. The conversation should be easy to start, because it should be started long before it is needed.

Ours used to be triggered when we moved house and were dealing with a solicitor anyway.

It is like so many things in life people need to do, that they get so embarrassed to talk about, wills, sex etc etc. When she was a child DD used to regale us with stories of what her friends told her that their parents told them about sex or how they avoided the issue. Her only compliant was, that because we were quite happy to discuss anything with her quite openly, she could make no contribution to the conversation.

Dizzyribs Mon 03-Apr-23 17:39:05

My mum took me to the solicitor to make a will the day after my 18th birthday. I was about to sit my a levels before university, so I had nothing to leave and no property of my own! She just wanted me to see it as a normal part of being an adult. I must say it has helped a lot.
I took my husband the week we returned from honeymoon (much to his amusement) and have updated both wills every few years since - especially when import life events happened. We added POAs when we turned 60 (should have done it earlier)
My mum had Alzheimer’s and her last years were made easier for me because the paperwork was all done; up to date and to hand.
I’m so grateful to mum for that. I see so many friends who have the problem you are having @cabbie, it must be so tough when it is only associated with your mortality. 💐

Cabbie21 Mon 03-Apr-23 18:02:22

Yes, he had a real wobble today when his thoughts went back to the three weeks he spent in hospital. I have to pick my moment.