How can I reward Care Home staff

The last course I did on dementia (a really good one) taught us to enter into a persons reality with them, rather than try to fetch them into ours.
Each time you tell someone bad news, its as if they are literally hearing it for the first time, with all the shock associated with it.
Its kinder, I'd say, to go along with your mums reality.

I'm sorry to hear about your Dad dying op. It sounds like he died the way he wanted to.

How about some nice pens or notebooks for the staff - they often have to provide these themselves. (not really posh ones just a box of nice ones or maybe ones with different 'toppers' to make it more fun.) They could even be put into party bags with a pot of blowing bubbles and a little bag of sweets each or maybe herbal tea bags - for the much needed relaxing at the end of a busy shift.

Humbertbear - different situation but we bought a selection of quality hand creams, one each for the staff of ICU when our young 21mth old grandchild came home. They had been so caring and one had told us of the havoc the constant hand washing did to her skin.
We felt it would be nicer than chocolates, especially as so many are health conscious these days, a little different and practical too.
So sorry for your loss - but how wonderful that you have this fantastic home to continue caring for your mother.
Wish they were all like yours.

My Mum died the end of last year in a Care Home. The staff were wonderful and looked after her and us when her time came to go. We gave the home her television which was new, biscuits and chocolates so everyone could have a share. When it came to clearing out Mum's clothes the Home said they would gladly have them as they often had people come into the home with no change of clothes and no-one to care about them, needless to say we gave the Home everything.

A large tin of Roses or box of choc biscuits to share would go down well. Plus a thankyou letter.

Sorry for your loss dragonfly

Hi, my Mum died unexpectedly, Dad had dementia. Definitely tell your Mum. My Dad just looked at me and asked why I was crying, I told him, he said she was a good girl! They were married 74 years , we took him to the funeral, what right did we have to deny him that. No one knows what if anything goes on in the head of someone with dementia. After the funeral, he obviously forgot and every time I saw him he asked where Mum was, heartbreaking. He’s with her now, God Bless

Here's another vote for not telling your mum. Just think about what you would achieve by telling her.It depends on the stage of dementia, but it sounds as though she is moderately advanced. She might not remember, in which case, she will suffer anew every time she is reminded, or she may become fixated on it, and the care home staff will have to deal with the consequences.
My dad is at the later stages of a vascular dementia, and he is still very verbal. My SIL has just died fairly suddenly. We have not told him. He did ask about seeing my brother "and family", when my SIL was in the hospice, and I said they were very busy at the moment, but they sent their love and would see him as soon as possible. He was happy to accept that. My nose might have grown a fraction longer, but he is content. By contrast, he is very upset every time he thinks about my mother, who died 26 years ago, and insists he has just found out. He hasn't of course.
To tell your mother will cause her distress, and with dementia, she hasn't got the tools in her mental toolbox to deal with it. It is an extra burden for you, but it is very probably in her best interests.

Thank you Hildagard and I appreciate what you are saying but there is no way my mum could attend a funeral. My dad at 96 did not want any fuss and as there are no friends around and my children live far away we have decided on a direct cremation. My husband and I will say goodbye to him in private and at a later date we as a family are going to celebrate his life. When my mum dies we are all going to Tenerife where they spent their winters towards the end of their lives and spread their ashes. I hate funerals and often wonder at the people who turn up at them who did not bother with them when they were alive. I know this is controversial but it is partly because my mum cannot attend and also his wish.

When Mum died after being well looked after for 5 years I was the executor for her will.
The family all agreed to send them a generous donation, though she didn't leave a lot.
We trusted the owner/manager to make good use of it.

Sending love and sincere condolences to you Dragonfly and family. I agree with sending a letter or a thank you for your kindness card to the staff. I also think that chocolates would be appreciated. I personally wouldn't tell you mum. When my dad died, his eldest brother who had dementia used to ask when we visited, " Where's Pat?" and we used to say that he's asleep. He was satisfied with that.

When a friend of mines mother passed away she bought boxes of good biscuits for the staff to share, and took a couple of the ladies who had been especially kind to her mum out for lunch a few weeks after the funeral

Sorry to hear about your dad.
Last month when it was NHS birthday, someone recommended taking little presents into their local hospital. However subsequent suggestions were not food, and said little treats were more appropriate. Recycling smellies that have sat in the cupboard? Poundland does foot spa/talcs/bubble bath from well-known companies for a quid?

if you give a donation specify if it is for the unit or for the staff. They'll be separate funds and it'll automatically go to the unit/residents benefit if you don't specify (which is fine too staff appreciate anything that helps them do their jobs).

Staff funds often go towards things like christmas parties or vouchers for everyone once theres enough in it.

in point of fact they are not allowed to receive gifts but if you wanted to give a nice box of biscuits or sweets the workers are always grateful my daughters work in hospitals and care homes they always say its nice to have something for a cuppa! otherwise can you contribute something to the home itself they usually have a fund raising project for something special in the home

they can receive tokens but expensive gifts go via the staff fund and so long as they're "checked in" its fine.

We have a niece who is a nurse and she is adamant about no chocolates as everyone gives them chocolates. I thanked the nurses who cared for my mother after a fall with a basket of toiletries (shower gel, body moisturiser, hand cream, talc, anti perspirant) to be kept in the staff bathroom. I was told the hand cream especially would be much appreciated as they have to use anti bac which dries out the skin.

so sorry for your loss X my mum has been in a care home for dementia now for five years.my motherinlaw went in in January and died four weeks later. It's so hard but you will get through it and a kind note of thanks will mean a lot.bsending you hugs at this sad time.