Gransnet forums

Bereavement

Death of my son

(55 Posts)
Gransooz Mon 19-Aug-19 19:56:09

Oh my goodness, your partner couldn’t be more wrong! I have no idea how grief-stricken you must feel as I haven’t lost a child. I have lost my parents and both of my brothers and I know how hard it was when they passed. Your child should never go before you so I’m not surprised at how you’re feeling. I think it’ll take a long time but eventually, hopefully the happy memories will overtake your sadness, but I feel the sadness will never go completely. He was your child and that will never change.

MissAdventure Mon 19-Aug-19 19:53:58

Its such early days for you, you poor soul.

There are several people who have lost their children (yes, they've died, for those who dislike the term 'lost')

My daughter died in Oct 2017, and I will never get over it, although of course, I have to function day to day.
I feel just as you do; I wanted to have her for longer than I did - I want what most parents have.
She was my best friend.

Have you heard of 'The compassionate friends"?
They run groups around the country for bereaved parents, whatever the circumstances, however old they were.

I'm not surprised you cry a lot, because it's so soon after such a trauma, it must still be sinking in for you.

Sorry I'm rambling, and I haven't got any advice, really, except come on here and chat to any of us online, because there are some incredibly kind people here.

I'm so sorry for your loss, I know the pain is indescribable.

flowers

Minniemoo Mon 19-Aug-19 19:49:33

Hi nessie. Can I just extend my sympathy to you. I am not a counsellor nor have I experienced such a terrible loss.

Are you in the UK? A GP could help put you in touch with agencies that can possibly assist. The Samaritans are also brilliant at listening which might help. It's not surprising that you're still crying. You will miss him terribly.

It is such a short time since your son died and it sounds like you're doing the your best, being back at work and trying to 'carry on'.

But the loss of a child must be the worst loss we can live through.

I wish I could be more help.

Sara65 Mon 19-Aug-19 19:47:48

Oh goodness Nessie, that is no time at all, of course your feelings are still raw.

I can’t imagine your grief, I know life has to go on, but for you it can never be the same.
Be kind to yourself, it will take time

nessie24 Mon 19-Aug-19 19:30:29

My son died suddenly on the 10th January 2019. I'm trying to get on with the normal things like going back to work to pay the bills but I'm finding it hard. Work are very good and help me all they can but I can't talk about him to them because they don't understand. I feel I can't talk to my family as don't want to upset them. My partner who wasn't my son's dad thinks I should be over the grief by now or he don't know what to say or do. He tries but seems to say the wrong thing. I cry alot because I miss him so much. I only had him for 26 years and I feel half of me has gone with him. I write in a diary to my son everyday and look at photos all the time. I'm not looking for a miracle just advice from people who have been through the same thing or advice from a councilor.