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Shattered illusions when you were very little?

(91 Posts)
Witzend Wed 21-Feb-18 11:32:38

For some reason I've just remembered trying to get behind the great big old 'wireless' that was plugged into the mains, to see the little people who were talking!
Oh, the disappointment at seeing only wires and mini light bulbs! Don't suppose I can have been more than 3 - maybe not even that.

As let-downs go, it was much greater than eventually finding out about Father Christmas/the tooth fairy, though of course I was a lot older then.
Any more?

Bridgeit Wed 21-Feb-18 12:13:31

Probably aged about 4 , when ever I asked my Mum the never ending question ‘why’? She would always reply because Z comes next ,took me a year or two to get it!

judypark Wed 21-Feb-18 12:31:26

I believed that AA men and policemen lived in their boxes on the side of the road.

ninathenana Wed 21-Feb-18 12:32:10

grin not heard that one Bridgeit

Grandma70s Wed 21-Feb-18 13:40:25

I just remember walking round the big old wireless looking for the man doing the talking. It was usually a man. I couldn't work out how he fitted in there. I suppose, like Witzend, I was 2 or 3.

My first visit, aged 7, to Piccadilly Circus. Nobody had told me it wasn’t a circus with a ring and dancing horses. In fact that first visit to London was full of shattered illusions. Buckingham Palace was a huge disappointment. I expected turrets at least. 10 Downing Street didn't even have a garden as far as I could see. It didn’t look anywhere near grand enough for a Ptime Minister to me.

janeainsworth Wed 21-Feb-18 13:52:10

witzend I too firmly believed that Daphne Oxenford et al lived inside our wireless.
But the real con was the buses that went to a place called Duplicate. The word fascinated me for some reason, and my parents insisted that Duplicate was somewhere ‘near New Mills’ in the Peak District, which seemed an exotic location. It was years before I clued on.

gillybob Wed 21-Feb-18 14:07:44

When i was little my mum told me she was a "skin specialist" and I told all my friends.

Turned out she worked for a posh ladies shop that sold fur shock

wotnot Wed 21-Feb-18 14:26:24

finding out where babies came from confused

Auntieflo Wed 21-Feb-18 14:32:34

Being taken up to London for a photo session when I was about 5/6, and then to a restaurant for lunch with my aunt. I heard that there was Welsh Rarebit, (pronounced rabbit), so as I liked rabbit, that what was I asked for. What I actually got was posh cheese on toast. I have never forgotten the disappointment.

Jalima1108 Wed 21-Feb-18 14:33:30

Bridgeit my DM used to say "because Y's a crooked letter and Z's not any better"
"Yes, mum, but Why?"

Neighbours were always known as Mr or Mrs Whoever, but friends of DM were known as 'aunties' and I remember realising that all these endless 'aunties' were just friends of DM and not real relatives and being very surprised (and relieved in one or two cases).

SueDonim Wed 21-Feb-18 14:54:00

One of my shattered illusions didn't occur until I was in my 20's! My grandad, who lived with us when I was a child, had an open fire, which was lit the traditional way, with newspaper, kindling and a match.

I knew there were these magical things called fire-lighters but my mum poo-pooed them as being totally unnecessary so they remained a mystery to me.

Fast forward some 20 years and I move to a house with an open fire. I purchase a pack of firefighters, ready to start a warming fire in the hearth.

Imagine my disappointment when I open the pack and found just a lot of rather smelly white squares that still needed a match to make a fire!

I have no idea what I was expecting but it wasn't that. grin

judypark Wed 21-Feb-18 16:40:43

I was about 4 and overhead my parents saying that my regular Saturday night babysitter was bringing her boyfriend who was a teddy boy that evening. I was beside myself with excitement. Imagine my disappointment when she turned up with this spotty lad complete with drainpipes and a ducks arse haircut. Not a tuft of fur in sight.

MissAdventure Wed 21-Feb-18 16:53:48

I was in my 30s, so not very little, when I visited someone who asked me if I liked oxtail soup.
I replied that I did, and she told me she would let me have some when she had finished making it.
My eyes strayed to the kitchen sink, and there was an actual tail, with a fluffy bit on the end, which was soaking in water!
I hadn't realised it was made with a real tail, and I haven't eaten it since!

Grandma70s Wed 21-Feb-18 17:05:36

judypark, I am imagining what a ‘teddy’ boy might look like in a 4-year-old’s mind. That is so funny.

I’m enjoying this thread.

M0nica Wed 21-Feb-18 17:26:38

Discovering that those little tobacconists with a sign up saying 'Players please' were not inviting people in to play some arcane game in the curtained off back room behind the counter, which always looked so mysterious but encouraging people to buy a certain brand of cigarette.

My late dear sister was puzzled by the sign 'Bill Stickers will be prosecuted' posted on every blank wall. She kept wondering what he had done.

Again these are all memories from when we were four or five.

NotTooOld Wed 21-Feb-18 18:29:59

My mother warned me, prior to a visit to a pair of her ancient aunts, 'if they offer you cake, say no, because it will be seed cake and you won't like it'. Of course, when offered the cake I only heard the magic word 'cake' and said 'yes, please' and ended up crying because it didn't taste like the cake I was used to. My mother was cross with me for showing her up. I must have been about 4.

Witzend Wed 21-Feb-18 18:31:18

Not exactly a shattered illusion, but I often wondered why it said 'Dilute to taste' on bottles of squash. Surely you could taste it perfectly well without diluting it? In fact, it would surely taste a lot stronger without a load of water?

nigglynellie Wed 21-Feb-18 18:52:41

I was always taught not to speak to strangers, so imagine how confused I was when aged 6, my mother on meeting their bank manager in the street, instructed me to say Good afternoon Mr ?. I stoutly refused not once but twice!! Afterwards , having been reprimanded for being rude, I explained that she had always told me not to speak to strangers!!! Apparently, there were strangers, and strangers!!!confused

NonnaW Wed 21-Feb-18 18:54:00

Witzend that used to puzzle me too!
On the subject of ‘why’, DH always tells DGS ‘because y has a curly tail”.

judypark Wed 21-Feb-18 19:22:57

Oh my, this is bringing back so many memories. The first circus I went to featured Davy Crockett of the Wild Frontier. Sadly For me Davy when he appeared had only the standard two ears either side of his head and not a wild one in the middle! Gutted!

GrandmaMoira Wed 21-Feb-18 19:33:54

Like those who wondered where the people were in the wireless, I wondered how the people got into the television. I remember wondering who Bill Stickers was as well.

Apricity Thu 22-Feb-18 10:32:09

Love Davy Crockett with the wild front ear! ? Priceless, still chuckling
For me it was that penny drop moment when I finally realised that there were no fairies in the garden. I had diligently sought them under leaves and flowers but never found even one tiny fairy. I could picture them so clearly. I think I was about 5.
My version of that troublesome chap "Bill Stickers" was the posters on building sites saying "Post No Bills". I thought those people had found a miraculous way to never pay accounts. And my first two friends at primary school were called Prune and Lonely, definitely not Prue and Leonie as others tried to suggest.

LadyPenelope Thu 22-Feb-18 10:32:36

I hated my first school, and my mother had literally to drag me kicking and screaming. When I asked why I had got to go to school, she told me it was because the goverment said I had to. It was at least several months before I realised that my headmaster was not in fact the government. (I did in fact have a change of school a short time later.)

inishowen Thu 22-Feb-18 10:33:49

My daughter used to stand in front of the tv to show Tony Hart her paintings! I used to think there was a man called Ed in all my comics. I didn't know it was short for editor.

amt101 Thu 22-Feb-18 10:34:25

Perhaps the answer then should have been because I zed Bridgeit.