Desperately unhappy, being bullied at work

When I was a social worker, there came a day when I suddenly knew that I could not do it for even one more minute. The reasons were that bureaucracy was preventing me doing what I was trained to do, I had simply become a financial gatekeeper for the LA, and the cations that I was being forced to take were to the absolute detriment of my clients.

I got signed off sick and resigned forthwith.

I cannot begin to tell you the weight that was lifted from my shoulders! - I felt as though someone had liberated me from a prison camp! - I could have jumped over the house, I felt so light!

I was 50 at the time, and luckily I had other skills under my belt and made a new freelance career for myself in arts outreach, photography and running singing workshops. I had a wonderful 10 years doing things I loved.

So.....walk away, don't look back, shrug it off, enjoy a new life. No regrets, no agonising over what has gone before.

There were several other SWs who left at a similar time and for similar reasons and some of them spent the subsequent years going over and over the injustices that occurred before they left - and they are doing it still. Please do not fall into that trap - walk away with your eyes to the future and just ENJOY!!

actions!!!

Lucky by name and lucky by nature! Good for you for being brave and doing what you love most!

Many posters have advised joining a Union and I agree with that. As you are a member, push your rep to represent you in this. I would also recommend that you keep accurate notes of all transactions with her either on your own with her or with others present, even if only at other desks. Dates, times, issue, conversation that took place etc. You don't have to inform her you are doing this but it will prove useful if it does to Tribunal. Not sure if you can take it to Ombudsman if all else fails but I am sure there is someone on here who will know. If she is ambitious perhaps she will move on soon. Good luck with it.

How awful for you. I agree with other posters that you need to go through your contract with a fine tooth comb and contact ACAS for their advice and support.

When you've done both of these things you will be in position to confront her from a position of strength. I'm pretty certain that this type of treatment would be construed as an attempt at constructive dismissal.

I understand that the thought of confronting her, once you've established your rights will fill you with dread, but you must do so.

She is a bully and as we all know, all bullies are cowards. Having behaved so badly for so long, she wont be expecting you to stand up to her.

I wish you well.

I am so sorry for you. Keep in mind that you are in the right. Log everything as evidence. No-one minds coming in on a different day occasionally or sometimes going to a meeting when it's normally a day off but it should not be routine like this.

If there is an HR Department, try to speak to them. Try and keep calm.

Are you in a Union? The only trouble with taking action over constructive or unfair dismissal (if it comes to that) is that it can become hard to get another job - a friend of mine found that out.

I wish you the very best of luck.

Look at this a different way GoD. What would make you really happy? Imagine having all the time to put into your new business which sounds fun, fulfilling and exciting and I bet it is something you have a knack for. I know it's a money issue but with all the time to put into in as well as a bit of 'good' pressure to earn, I reckon you could really make it work for you. Take a leap of faith, cut back all possible outgoings and put your heart and souls into it and it will bring back your confidence, self worth and your smile. Let go of this horrible situation and take back control of your life. I know your oh needs time but I bet it would help him if you were happier making his job easier too.

Hi, how rotten to be going into work and feeling that stress. I too am a civil servant and absolutely appalled by what I have read. I have been a team leader and understand exactly attendance management policies. I also know that the behavior you are being subjected to is totally unacceptable. I’m unsure of the size building you work in or which department you belong to I know in the one I’m in if your bully is your immediate line manager and you have concerns this may be coming down from their manager then you are within your right Togo to another manager one you feel to be independent. In the civil service if you raise a grievance with any manager they have a duty of care to check the guidance and progress your grievance. I do understand that there is a policy in place where if you have a secondary job either paid or unpaid you do neeed to just pop something in writing to your manager. His is standard practice. I myself am full tine but also do a bit of volunteering work and have let my manager know. With regards to making you feel you have to go in on your NWD that’s incorrect. You may well have once been full time but you have taken partial retirement and part of that process was to renegotiate your hours. Don’t let this bully push you out. Makes me feel so sad that there are nasty people who just seem to want to be on some sort of power kick. Clearly not a nice person. Good luck. Xxx

I think if you read through the whole thread you will find that OP has put this unhappy situation behind her.

Thank goodness ?