Noisy neighbours.

Thank you for your kindness …..today has been one of the worst

Mincub - I just wanted to say I am truly sorry to hear of the terrible situation you have endured, and I’m sorry that you haven’t been treated any better with regard to this later trouble.
Please God your situation improves soon. Sending you every good wish for your health and welfare ?

Mincub, you need to start your own thread. Just go to ‘ Forums’, and pick a category, eg, Ask a gran. You can then start your own discussion. You may get more replies that way.

I have a bit of a problem …it’s my problem really so I understand if you don’t see where I’m coming from.
I live in social housing in a disabled bungalow stuck between two houses. I’m living here because I stood up to a terrible campaign of ASB resulting in my beings victim of an attempted firebombing and ending up hospital fir 14 weeks and a homeless unit fir 12 weeks before the council took responsibility. I then relocated to where I am now. The daughter of my local councillor already on an asbo was found guilty, her father ignored the problem (she got two years later for Rs silly aggravated harassment to another family and bragged about running me out of town) her ‘playmate’ in crime was the grandson of another councillor who stood up at a restorative justice hearing and said I shouldn’t even be here as it was my fault for not making it easy on myself and my police beat officer forged my name on a witness statement and was charged with perverting the course of justice and using a false instrument to try and cover it up. So that’s the background not only was I physically injured but ended up with PTSD also.
So I promised myself don’t get involved in neighbours and everything was bearable the odd ruckus with noise to which I am hypersensitive but nothing too bad to bear. All until recently, I have two issues that are making me feel like running away.
The worst one is there are three children who are left to their own devices constantly shouted at so there’s something not right and now Into the mix comes a lady with two children one teenager and one about 6, father not about.
The 6 year old constantly rides his bike up and down in front of our bungalow next to our car parking space ( not on the pavement but actually in front of our bungalow and stands on our garden edging, being egged in by the kids the other side to do tricks on his bike. I have had my roses broken off and throw over my path and now they have taken to playing football over the top of my car backwards and forwards. It’s irritating and annoying, the eggers on are screamers and that never stops and I’ve also had a screwdriver thrown over the top of the car landing on my garden but can’t prove anything. I had a quiet word with the one mum and shesaid ‘ oh my boy didnt do anything it will be them’!
It wasn’t as I clearly saw him but don’t have the belly full for a ‘fight’. The other problem long-standing is an oil tank installed against my back fence with no fire boarding and just 4 metres from my bedroom. The tank leaked into my garden and we were left for 18 months before our landLord did anything, through two hot summers where the soil sizzled. We both have Bronchiectasis and are extremely clinically vulnerable, I called environmental health in the end because it got so bad and I have letters from then telling me my landlord never sought any advice. Landlord says they did, even when the fuel pipe was put in my garden on the boundary they did nothing.
My back gate broken into and the pipe in situ after me having a day at the hospital and nothing has been done even though the tank still smells. So I’m loathe to approach them over the screeching and the playing football over my car. I registered with a housing association nearer my son in Oxford but after 5 years all they can offer me is a sheltered flat or sink estates, I don’t know what to do. I’ve never been in this position before as I owned my own house before the ASB (227 crime/incidents) over 4 years. Sorry for going on but I don’t think I can take much more. ??

I wish I could offer you some advice...but I can't think of anything that hasn't already been suggested. I really feel for you... I actually dread staying away from home (holidays etc) cos I'm a really light sleeper and we always seem to end up in noisy places!!

It is awful having noisy neighbours. I find it distressing too .
However , as Notinthemanual says , they may not realise they're so noisy .
30 years ago , with 3 small kids and a 4th soon to arrive + 3 barky Terriers we moved into a lovely 4 bed semi .
It was built in 1923 and , we assumed had really thick walls because we simply never heard our elderly neighbours ( 2 retired professors )
All we ever heard was Mr C next-door practice his piano at 6 pm every evening and that was only audible in the bedroom near their pian room . Very nice .
So .. we didn't worry about noise although, thankfully we we never like OP's neighbours.
We got a huge shock though , when , many years later, our professors went to live with daughter, we retired and our kids left . Next door buyers had 4 musical kids .... suddenly there was screaming, shouting, banging, thumping and endless piano , violin, clarinet practice at all hours. What a shock !
The walls weren't thick at all . Our professors were just quiet!
They were extremely kind and patient with us for all those years and we hadn't a clue how noisy we must have been.
So , politely and nicely tell them first.
They may be sad to hear they upsetting you .
If they not sad then , maybe, like our professors, a house move is the only solution ?

I feel for anyone suffering from noisy neighbours. I’ve had it in the past and it really took it’s toll. When you dread summer and the longer days and light nights because of the noise in the gardens it’s awful. I really do think there should stronger laws concerning excessive noise as it’s hell for people having to live with it.

Earnshaw. Hello,thanks for your thoughts , see my post above 19.54 , I had a word and hopefully all will be ok .

feel so so sorry for you, years ago we had noisy neighbours on both sides but it doesnt sound as bad as what your having to put up with, so difficult to know how to deal with it because you cant even get away from the noise etc can you, with us,in the end,it was one of the reasons we moved, i wouldnt recommend anything so drastic , try having a quiet word, do let us know how you get on

I'm glad you've (hopefully) sorted it.

I have a couple of youngish girls living above me at the moment and they can get a bit loud with their music.

I've spoken to them about the noise on several occasions but I don't think they realised how much I can hear. They've said that they never hear me, but I'm sure they do, it's impossible to live without noise.

The last time I spoke to them was a couple of nights ago when we met outside, she asked if I could still hear their music, I replied that it was loud enough for me to sing along to! It's been quieter since.

I feel for you, I really do. There is nothing worse. We had a selfish spoiled witch aged 18 living next door and last summer she was horrendously noisy and caused so much drama with her parents. I politely went around at ten thirty to ask her to turn music down as my daughter & partner could not sleep. She dismissed me at the door saying “ yeah yeah, well we are going out now” she moved out just before Christmas after many arguments with her parents and it was bliss. Sadly she’s back but has to probably tow the line a bit. A few years ago I had to involve environmental health due to horrendously excessive barking in my cul de sac of 14 dogs in one house. It drove us bonkers, but the owner& his partner were out at work all day. I had to keep a log for a month and write everything down, times, dates, length of howling& barking incidents daily. Don’t get me wrong I’m not against dogs - we have a dog in our own home. The owner is a very unreasonable man so a Polite knock on the door would’ve resulted in it being slammed in my face after he had laughed at me. Environmental health did not follow anything through after I handed the detailed log in to them. NOTHING was done as regards to recording unreasonable noise levels, however I think he may have had notification that a few people had complained because it did improve a tiny bit. When the woman had a child and stayed home more, the dogs were quieter but don’t expect miracles from noise abatement or environmental health, in my county it was absolutely no help.

So pleased to hear you had a conversation, glad there’s been a breakthrough

Noisy neighbours. Part two ,, hello everyone , Thankyou for all your very kind helpful ideas on my new neighbours. But there has been a breakthrough I wanted to share with you which put a different slant on the original problem,
My neighbour took a parcel in for me ,I knocked , she came to the door smiling , we chatted , i asked her how she was settling in , she apologised for the dogsyapping and did we hear them much, So I said “ well yes the walls are thin. I heard a real humdinger of a row last night , who won “so she said the kids had been under a lot of stress at school with the pandemic and wearing masks in class and being put in mixed classes, Also one of her children is Autisic , which in itself is very challenging and that he can kick off at the slightest thing, So, it makes things a bit more bearable and I feel sorry for her, This weekend has been a lot quieter , I am glad I didn’t do anything drastic or go round complaining with all guns blazing.
Let’s just wait and see what happens in the future.
I appreciate all your helpful kind advice you all offered ,

I hope its not a case of domestic abuse, its ominous that you hardly see the lady only husband

We had problem neighbours, and no family living close by, we tolerated it for quite a while ( two years) in the end we just bit the bullet and moved. We are late 60s and late 70s not exactly the stage of life to up and move. However we’ve no regrets at all, but a move under different circumstances would have been nicer. I sincerely wish you well.

I think some local authorities will lend you a decibel meter, so you get the evidence of noise without the legal problem of recording what is said. Definitely keep a note of what and when. Check with your local council if they have dedicated noise abatement officer or department.

Well said Nanananana1

The problem with putting in formal complaints etc is that you have to declare the problem when you sell your house if and when you decide you've had enough and move on
We decided our noisy neighbours were bad enough to make us move, after over 30 years in our old house. Luckily we now have wonderful neighbours and have never looked back
You may love your home but nothing is worth the stress poorly behaved neighbours cause.
I know that saying a house is 'only bricks and mortar' but you will find that with a positive attitude, a new adventure will prove that home is where ever you and your loved ones, your pets or your favourite possessions are. Even moving one street away could make the world of difference

Our upstairs neighbours have 3 children and are always apologising for their noise (they have wooden floors). We have no issue with them so long as its not after midnight - and provided they do not complain about our occasional loud rock music (not after midnight, obviously), which they don't - the system works well for both families.

You are correct, to be classed as noise nuisance, the event has to occur more than once, not be classed as normal family life and not impinge on an owners lawful right to "enjoyment" of their own private property... However, this depends if the residents own or rent the home. If the residents rent the complaint should be aimed to the land owner.

The advice to keep a record of days, times and length of noise "nuisance ", is correct. However, anyone whom owns their own home is lawfully entitled to the "reasonable enjoyment" of their own homes.
Noise nuisance does have to be "more than a one off", and not be considered "part of normal family life" .
Keep a written record of events, and perhaps any recordings of the noise.
You could contact the Citizens Advice, or a law firm whom may have free half hour slots, not all do.
Although, personally I would politely tell your neighbours that the shouting is causing you distress, and that some of the things they are saying should be kept private, and you would be embarrassed for them if anyone else could hear these "private" remarks.
As another person has mentioned, your neighbours may not know you can hear them.

I remember, many years ago , a friend was telling me about his awful noisy neighbours, he did actually tell them they were being a nuisance, but they took absolutely no notice , so he decided to play them at their own game . When he went to work in the mornings for his 8 hour shift , he would set up a particularly awful track of music on his CD player , then put it on repeat , put up the volume loud enough for them to hear it , and leave it play , on repeat, all day long until he got home . After a few days of doing this , the noisy neighbours complained to him that it was disturbing them and could he knock it off , but he already had his reply , he said,” while you keep making all the noise that you are doing and disturbing me then I’m going to put my cd on every day until you stop “ . Needless to say , that solved the problem .

I don’t think a once-a-year party that you were warned about (with or without a snow machine) really is at all the same, cc.

It is the day-in day-out issue which is really unbearable.

My ex-neighbours had an appallingly loud Christmas party one year. They'd mentioned it to us but not that it would go on well into the early hours, inside and outside. We decided that we'd go away during their parties in future, a good idea as the next party involved a snow making machine and a party that was largely held outside. These people have absolutely no concern or respect for others.
Our neighbours were middle class and respectable and otherwise civil.
We've now moved.

We have a very similar situation, but they own the bungalow next to ours...they have been homebuilding for 3 years, every evening and every weekend, we've had to report them to planning twice, and need to do so again, as we now have a 10 ft skating ramp overlooking our garden and being used 6+ hours a day at weekends. They moved in 2 adults and 2 children, now have 4 children - and the only communication appears to be screaming. Our lovely neighbours on the other side have give up and sold up, but we have our 91 year old Father in Law, so are trapped. Good luck x