Backhanded Compliments

I have a little poem in mind, told to me by a man from Yorkshire.

I was having catch up coffee with a colleague who had been taught by my Mum , she leant over and said , you are so like your Mum …….. but ………. She was good looking …… I am afraid I laughed and left her to pay the bill!

I was out with a friend, helping her to choose some bedroom furniture for her marital home as she had just got wed.
She made the comment that her wife was a lot like me, and "didn't care if things matched".

At a family wedding years ago some evil minded bitch ( a guest the same size as a stick insect ) made a big fuss about putting on weight with all the wedding food etc. She then looked at me and commented that most people who are very overweight usually have pretty faces though.
I was obviously the exception to the rule.

A lady asked me "How are you and your dear SON" he is my brother aged 79 and I am 62

popping in on friends, by prior arrangement, after having been to an event that warranted smart clothing Wow, you look so smart.....well usually when I saw them it was for weekend casual events, where dressing formally would have been the wrong thing to do

In my thirties I was walking down the street when I came across a gang of youngish scruffy looking blokes. I knew there was going to be some comment from the way they were sniggering. As they drew level with me one of them said "I bet you were nice looking when you were young!!" I never forgot it, it was priceless.

infinity that reminds me of another one! A group of us were going out and met at a friend's house. A woman who we didn't know that well was all over one of us, exclaiming how pretty she looked etc. She then turned to me and said, " Oh well, Batty, at least you have character."

We invited some friends over for dinner, just a small get-together. One of my "friends" said, "We were due to go out with my sister and her husband, but we'll come to yours instead. We can always go somewhere nice another time"!!!!!

A meal for friends after I was married, using the wedding presents for the first time, and one 'friend' said, 'Oh what lovely glasses. Easybee, who did you borrow them from?'

Of the meal: 'how did you manage to cook all that in such a tiny little kitchen?'

I complimented a work colleague once on her smart trousers. “Oh”, she said, “this diet I’m on is working well, so they’re getting too big for me. I’ll let you have them soon”.

Out with my daughter last week when she said Oh, there is a car for you Ma, it's ugly ..................

A colleague in a care home was hurrying through the residents' lounge when she heard one of them say "That's some b*tch, that one. Quick on her feet, though."

(The 2nd was true, the 1st not!)

I’ve told this one before but a few years ago we had builders in and I was always in black or navy blue trousers with matching tops. One day I was going out ‘dressed’ in a black and white dress and heels. As I came downstairs the tiler did a double take and said ‘bloody hell, you scrub up well’.

Whilst having a facial the beautician said to me ‘ You have lovely skin in between the spots! ‘

I'm a real apple shape but with very thin legs, one day my daughter was watching me change my clothes when she said "you look just like one of those balls of wool with the knitting needles sticking out the bottom"

MissAdventure

I have a little poem in mind, told to me by a man from Yorkshire.

Ah. go on, MissAdventure, you can't leave us hanging like that!

As a harassed young mum of 4 an older lady just made my day by saying “oh your little girls are so pretty, they’re not a bit like you are they?” Gee thanks!

My friend d looked at my front garden and remarked how many different plants I had. Then she said Why don't you get it all paved over.
When I showed her the back yard which is full of tubs and pots she told me it looked like Paddys market!

These really made me laugh, great thread.

My favourite which I have mentioned before, I asked my daughter what she thought of a top I was trying on. Her reply ' well it's alright for you mother but I wouldn't wear it.'

Ah. go on, MissAdventure, you can't leave us hanging like that!

MaggieMaybe

Yorkshire born and Yorkshire bred.
Great at fighting, mint in bed.

dolphindaisy

I'm a real apple shape but with very thin legs, one day my daughter was watching me change my clothes when she said "you look just like one of those balls of wool with the knitting needles sticking out the bottom"

I'm the same shape.
My friend told me I looked like Claire Rayner with Twiggy's legs attached.

MissAdventure

Ah. go on, MissAdventure, you can't leave us hanging like that!

MaggieMaybe

Yorkshire born and Yorkshire bred.
Great at fighting, mint in bed.

I couldn't possibly comment, MissAdventure. But as noted by Callistemon, I haven't LTB yet.