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How has dating changed?

(37 Posts)
LaraGransnet (GNHQ) Wed 07-Feb-18 14:22:33

In the run-up to Valentine's Day (stay with us, we're not going to suggest anything too cheesy), we've been talking about dating and how it's changed over the years. From meeting someone new, to first dates and break-ups, how different are your experiences to your children's (or grandchildren's?) Which dating norms do you think it's a shame to have lost? And which are you quite glad aren't around anymore?

Nanny41 Thu 08-Feb-18 16:38:25

Yes things are different these days. Here in Sweden when they have sex education in School at an early age, they give out condoms to everyone in the class, maybe a good idea in some ways, maybe an encouragement in otherways, thats how it is these days.Who said romance isnt dead!

Morgana Thu 08-Feb-18 16:49:23

I think it is a shame that it all seems to hinge so much on physical appearance nowadays. We seem to have become obsessed with how people look/dress etc. Have you seen that strange TV programme where they choose who they want to date by looking at naked contestants?

GabriellaG Thu 08-Feb-18 16:52:02

I wasn't allowed to date when dad was alive. Sadly, he dropped dead when I was 17 (atherosclerosis) and then I went into nursing, living above the hospital ...and clubbing grin
Met ex through the Guardian ads but had to tell my then fiancé who was a colour Sgt in the Grenadier Guards and serving in Ireland.
So, no formalities with my mum who was glad not to have to answer the door to many different faces when I was home. Married for 31 years then I decided to be single again.

Morgana Thu 08-Feb-18 16:54:22

Sorry didn't answer the original question! Met D.H. after I had left home. We lived together before we married. It was just becoming more acceptable in those days - although not with parents!! My D.H.'s grandma wrote to him and said I was a whore for living with him. They didn't mince their words then!

GabriellaG Thu 08-Feb-18 17:07:08

Boyfriends used to buy my mum chocolates and bring me flowers and mum often cooked them dinner. My ex bought my wedding dress from Browns in Chester. I hadn't 'succumbed' with previous boyfriends so my ex was my first and I always went for lads/men who had interesting or edgy jobs and could hold a decent conversation.

Funnygran Thu 08-Feb-18 18:04:38

Taking them home for a meal after a few dates seemed to be the norm although was often very embarrassing with younger siblings around. When I met DH my parents loved him as he was and still is very good at DIY - my dad was willing but not very able! As part of his student course DH went abroad for six months. In those days of course there was no internet, Skype or mobile phones and I never spoke to him while he was away. Missed him but just accepted it and got on with my own studies.

charjoy Thu 08-Feb-18 18:54:30

I feel sorry for teenagers today. Perhaps I am old fashioned but I think it's better you get to know each other first before having sex. Sex should be with love in my book. No wonder there are so many teenagers with anxiety/depression - they feel they have to have sex otherwise they are called frigid.
As for the goings on in Coronation street - no wonder there is so much unhappiness!

shirleyhick Thu 08-Feb-18 20:07:30

The courting and waiting at the end of the date to see if you got a kiss.

kathsue Thu 08-Feb-18 20:35:19

Yes Morgana I saw the program Naked Attraction by accident. Definitely cringeworthy. Would anyone really choose a date by comparing their private parts. Yuk

I'd left home when I met my husband and we moved in together but I couldn't tell my parents. It wasn't the done thing back in the 70s.

M0nica Thu 08-Feb-18 21:24:27

Thankfully, I was never under any pressure to marry. I didn't have any boyfriends until I was 18 because I was at boarding school. I then went to university 200 miles from home and what happened there was no one's business but my own. After university I got a job and moved out.

So my parents knew nothing about my love life until I went home with DH and told them we were engaged.

The difference I notice now is how much teens and twenties go round in large mixed sex groups and are much more tactile with each other and a boy and girl can get on well together without everyone making comments. When we were in groups they were much more likely to be single sex and being seen with a male or making a pleasant comment always led to assumptions that you were keen on the man involved. I once made the mistake of commenting that an acquaintance had a nice smile, which he did, and was pursued by assumptions for months. I was not remotely interested in him.

W11girl Thu 08-Feb-18 22:38:05

I agree with Bridgeit...happy days. 9 August 1969, I went to the local phonebox at least ten times to ring my boyfriend's house, as he was arriving back from the Isle of Wight festival where he had gone with friends. We were due to meet up on his return. I eventually spoke to him...he dumped me! he had found some new at the festival...I was broken hearted went home and cried for 3 days! Oh the pain of it...I can still remember it as if it was yesterday! If that happened today he could have just done it by text and saved me all the legwork!