Poppy seller commits suicide

What a lovely lady she was - but in all honesty I think it is a potential problem with her age and her generation.

Speaking from experience. Mum has expressed almost the identical words she said about giving to those in need, and yesterday she asked my DH about what I think was a Red Cross letter in which I think was a cotton bag (I didn't see it) and what to do about it as she had given quite a lot this month. DH of course assured her and threw the letter away. I think as you get older and frailer that although she is still very bright she is too frail to take any sort of pressure from any source and needs to be protected from such stuff.

This is a tragic story.

I am often tempted to give to the BBC appeal on Sunday mornings, however you are divulging your details and can be easily targeted.

I used to collect in the street for a sea mans charity.

It was an eyeopener as to the generosity of the residents who I knew well.

The chief execs of some of the bigger charities seem to be extremely well paid

I started off here (France) donating to a cancer charity, and later started to receive requests from 4 others, the last being Red Cross.
No more since then! they must pass on the names of donors.
I just send a small cash donation by post when I can afford it, 5€ or so.
But what irritates me is that Red Cross especially keep sending me quite posh gifts such as wallets of fancy writing paper and envelopes, where the money could be better spend on needy people. One day I'll get round to writing them to ask them to stop sending such things.

I thought about raising this ladies demise on the 'Charities canvassing for money thread' we had recently but thought better of it. It does feed into it though.

Of course it cannot be factually determined that this was the cause or part of a wider issue of the cause of her death until presumably an inquest has taken place but the sad thing is it is not likely to change unless charities are banned from cold calling/asking for funding. Not likely to happen is it!

She certainly sounds like a very kind woman, a tragic story.

While it makes for a good story, and of course cannot be discounted, I think we should guard against assuming the lady jumped, Until we know otherwise, all that can be said certainty is that she "fell".
Bearing in mind a former much loved member of GN's death in a mountainous area of France just 18 months ago, coming to hasty conclusions makes this sad event even more distressing for her family.

Sorry, should have added that the thread title "Poppy seller commits suicide" is what I initially took exception to.

The spot where the tragedy happen was show on BBC. It is a viewing point with waist high railings around. It wasn't a narrow path along the gorge. I would think it quiet difficult to 'fall'. But who knows.

This lady had been selling poppies in Bristol Cathedral for decades and was well known and honoured for her volunteering. What is your objection to the title Soutra

I didn't jump to a conclusion, I copied a newspaper headline and posted it in the "In the news" thread. More than one newspaper has reported it as a suicide.

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I live just outside of Bristol and would make the journey to the Cathedral to buy my poppy from this lovely lady. She had a ready smile and would be there no matter how cold it was, usually with a rug over her knees and her thermos flask next to her.

There are railings around the top of the cliffs but there are some places where it is possible to get to the cliff edge.

Her friends have said on local radio that she did have some health problems but they did feel the constant requests from charities were too much for her to deal with, she had so many direct debits that her bank account would sometimes go into the red. One friend said he had persuaded her last year to cancel 27 direct debits to charities but thought she may have started them up again because she couldn't say no to what she considered was a deserving cause. Such a sad end for a lovely lady.

It seems from what I heard that she had a soft heart and would set up standing orders for just about every charity that sent her material. She did not consider whether she could actually afford these, but the bank has written off her debts - not that they probably had much choice now that she has died. She seems to have been a much loved and respected lady and it would be sad if she had taken her life, whatever the reason.

I have tagged this on to the thread about Charities Canvassing for money. Apologies - I didn't realise this thread was here.

I dont think that the system is right about the system of getting donations either, Grannyknot.

Ninathenana until there is a verdict from the Coroner, this is still an "accidental" death, given that the police have said they are not treating it as suspicious. I am not blaming you grannyknot , but as I said, headlining it as "suicide" makes for a better front page story. I suppose it is possible that she blacked out, had a dizzy turn, fainted, had a heart attack or stroke or fell because she lost her balance. what a 92 year old was doing up there is something we may never know, but I just feel that we and the media should keep an open mind until there is a conclusive verdict.

Sadly her family say she took her own life (they were on the news) but there were other factors other than the incessant charity requests- she had 200 in one month.
Mishap I echo your post, she was much loved and will be sadly missed by so many.

This is so sad, that someone who has dedicated her life to helping others should feel under so much pressure and disillusioned that she would take her own life.
She sounds like a wonderful, caring person and the report I read said that, after all her years of giving and helping raise so much money for charity, she apparently was devastated when money she had posted to her son was stolen in the mail and that consequently she had lost her faith in human nature. That, and the pressure from ruthless marketing companies employed by today's big charities, must have upset her so much.

The account I read said that, along with being pestered by hundreds of charities, she had posted £250 cash to someone but it hadn't arrived - presumably stolen. She had apparently told a friend that she had "lost faith in people". I also read that she had taken a small step ladder with her and that she had been seen climbing over the fence - I don't know how accurate that information is.

Although I think that there were a number of other reasons for this lady apparently committing suicide, I really wish these charities would stop bombarding people like this.

A very sad end for for a lady who, by all accounts, was a generous and kind person.

There is another angle to look at. Someone bombarded with depressing news of the needs of others less fortunate than themselves might well become depressed Just because of what the charities are telling them, regardless of their sending any money. There's a limit to how much depressing news a person can cope with. I'm wondering if it was information about needy people rather than requests for money that tipped this poor lady over the edge.

Either way, the 'charities' that do this have shown themselves to be unfeeling (uncharitable) towards the people they're requesting money from. At least, their fund-raising sections, or their out-sourced mailing shooters have. The responsibility lies with the 'charities'. The fact that a fund-raising technique is successful in getting money out of people does not make it right.

I now only donate to charity either by putting money in a collection box or at a local level eg my nephew is autistic so my family give money to his local autistic group or I give a direct donation to the local hospice. Having been involved in PR and marketing I have seen how much money is wasted/used inappropriately by the bigger charities

I think some charities behaviour verges on coercion personally with high pressure tactics.
From my experience I was constantly phoned by one major international charity (and I didn't even know how they got my numb, they wouldn't tell me) asking for my initial one off donation to be increased from £10 to first £50 then £200!
It was only when I threatened to report them to the Charities Commission that the calls stopped - they were calling up to five times a week and even leaving messages on my answerphone.
I can understand someone less bolshi firm might well succumb.

All very sad.

I agree thatbags .

Once you "sign up" to help a charity by donating every month you are bombarded with information from every other charity on the planet. I help a couple of charities by donating a small amount each month by direct debit. Recently I have had several calls and letters asking if I would do the same for them, so I can quite understand how a very elderly lady could be tricked into something like this. The charities should be ashamed of themselves. Interesting to know which ones they were though.

There was a time when charities employed highly-paid fundraisers and were pilloried for doing so. I don't know if they still do, but I wonder if the process has now been handed over to less experienced – and cheaper – staff. However, these professional fundraisers used their connections to businesses and corporations that made vast charitable donations. Great Ormond Street Wishing Well appeal, for example, had pretty much reached its target before it even opened the appeal to the public. Btw When it started to receive donations that took it over the legally specified amount they were seeking, there were legal obligations about other uses of the donated money.

So e years ago - probably 15 or so -OH started paying Barnardosa monthly contribution by DD. After after he had retired they kept phoning with great regularity asking him to increase the amount. Eventually he told them that he was now retired and if he had one more call he would cancel the existing DD. That did stop the calls.
By contrast there is a children's hospice within a few miles of where we lived and I taught. They were at the time fundraising to build the hospice and we had organised fund raising at school etc. When we had a local lady call at the door and ask if we could possibly agree to join their monthly draw -£1 a month they asked for - we agreed and the money is collected by DD every 13 weeks. This was almost 20 years ago and they have NEVER asked for any increase in this amount. They send news letters by email now which are always extremely positive and never begging. They do tell how much they have raised with the various fund raising people do for them but always as simply a really positive piece. In all the years I have only ever won £10 and had a lovely cheery letter from them telling me they were delighted I had won and how they appreciated our continued support. Their attitude is lovely and would encourage me to donate more any time they were in need.

bags your post is spot on. I have to take a break from depressing stuff sometimes, when it seems to be everywhere.

Bez you have reminded me - I give £2 a month to a children's hospice or respite place in our area, and I hear from them once a year with a thank you letter. A much better strategy as I mostly forget about it. (I also won a tenner from them a while ago.)