Gransnet forums


hello .. and help!

(96 Posts)
bobbi Sat 30-Jun-12 15:39:51

Hello I'm new to this site, so please forgive me if I'm posting in the wrong forum.
Does anyone now of a site I can access for advice on anxiety, stress, loneliness etc?
I feel that I'm going to burst if I don't talk to someone soon.

Sorry to be a misery on my first post - but I'm feeling really out of sorts at the moment. sad

Ella46 Sat 30-Jun-12 16:05:04

Welcome bobbi, just let it all hang out on here! You'll get lots of help, support and kindness, and no one needs to be lonely as we are a friendly lot smile

Annobel Sat 30-Jun-12 16:12:47

Hi bobbi. I think we have probably covered all of the above in the past year, so why not tell us all about it. We're here for you. smile

Butternut Sat 30-Jun-12 16:20:28

Hi bobbi - I quite agree with Ella and Anno - this is a warm and friendly site. Give it a try. smile

HildaW Sat 30-Jun-12 16:43:00

bobbi, I have had a lot to cope with over last 5/6 years and this has left me in the Stress/anxiety/despression void. In the end went to my Doctors who was very helpfull. Everyone is different and some need a bit of medication to get through the worse. I can go for days - even the odd week where I'm fine but if something out of the ordinary happens (and it does not have to be much) I'm right back in the void, so I do know what its like.

Think there are a few of us in here so if you just want to chat I think you will find some great support.

Grandmanorm Sat 30-Jun-12 17:14:13

Hello Bobbi, have you thought about phoning Samaritans? They are there for everyone any time and not just if you are suicidal. Sometimes a friendly voice helps, although I am sure here will help you.
Sometimes life just stinks.

kittylester Sat 30-Jun-12 17:39:52

Welcome Bobbi - we are quite nice and supportive if you feel able to 'talk' on here, otherwise there will be lots of good advice winging its way to you before too long. flowers

flowerfriend Sat 30-Jun-12 18:26:48

Bobbi We all want to be supportive but can only do so when we have an idea whose experiences might help you. Life can be a joy and a bitch and often in quick succession.

greenmossgiel Sat 30-Jun-12 18:44:47

Bobbi, I think the way you're feeling just now, you just need to talk about stuff that's bothering you and making you really anxious? So many of us have felt just about at the end of our tether, and talking to the others on Gransnet has really helped so many of us so much. As flowerfriend commented, there may just be someone on here in particular that can help you, or maybe just talking it out, will give you the support and comfort that you might need just now. There's a wee 'facility' at the end of the lilac-coloured 'label' that you can click on to send a person a private message. Sometimes this is really useful if you feel that you don't want to speak about your problems fully to us all at once.
However you talk about things, you can be assured that you'll get so much support here. smile

Annika Sat 30-Jun-12 19:09:08

Hi Bobbi You are very welcome here.
What ever you do don't keep things to your self, it will not help you at all. You could choose to 'open' up here or private message to anyone of us. You could say at little or as much as you like about it, we don't mind. We have broad shoulders we can take it. smile
Because we are of a 'certain' age we have seen a lot of life and the s**t it throws at time to time so there is a huge scope of experience on here that can perhaps help you so please don't feel you are

dancingfeet Sat 30-Jun-12 20:12:32

Hi "Bobbi" Like so many I've been to hell and back in the last eighteen months, but Gransnet has helped to keep me sane with the forums and private messaging. After a very lonely day and spending most of it wishing for the phone to ring I eventually climbed out from under my pile of self help books and CDs and checked my emails to find the Fifty Shades of Grey Hair thread. I can quite honestly say it is the first time I have heard myself laugh in months and suddenly life didn't seem so lonely.
Please don't hesitate to put what ever is bothering you out here. There is a lot of experience, strength and hope.

Anagram Sat 30-Jun-12 20:18:46

Yes - sometimes a quick burst of just being silly can remind us that life doesn't have to be all beige (!) cardis and sensible shoes after a certain age!
Depression and loneliness can strike at any age, too, and it does help to share. I hope you feel able to do so on this forum, bobbi smile

Ariadne Sat 30-Jun-12 20:48:06

Hello, Bobbi! You are very welcome here. Talk to us - there are a lot of us, all with lots of experience of grief and joy and trauma and loss, and just talking really helps. Come on in.

nelliedeane Sun 01-Jul-12 09:02:06

Hello Bobbi I too am a sufferer but have taken medication to treat this for many years..

nelliedeane Sun 01-Jul-12 09:09:22

Bobbi sorry pushed wrong button and cut myself off our community is warm and friendly and hopefully give you the confidence to reach out to us,have been a sufferer myself and take medication for the symptoms of anxiety and depression I have taken them for many years.....If you would like to inbox me Perhaps I can help relieve some of your anxieties and your loneliness flowers

AlisonMA Sun 01-Jul-12 10:04:17

Hi bobbi I echo what everyone else has said and may well understand if you feel you can tell us a little more about your situation. It may be that one of us lives near you and could meet up and help you face to face if you want to tell us where you live.

I do hope you are coping and ask you to please let us know how you are today as I am sure many are concerned about you.

glammanana Sun 01-Jul-12 12:07:44

Hi bobbi I second everything that has been said by other GNers and hope you get in touch so we can give you some support in whatever the problem may be,there is sure to be someone who can give you advice and point you in the right direction,just talking about something can help so let us know how you are doing today.((hugs)))

dahlia Sun 01-Jul-12 20:59:19

Welcome, Bobbi - I feel sure you will find the same kind of thoughtful help that has been such a boon to me since I joined Gransnet.
Until retirement I worked with a mental health community team. Many of our "clients" were just like you, anxious, low and feeling at the end of their tether. At last they asked their GP for help, and were then referred to our team for short-term counselling and/or referral onwards for therapy work. There is no disgrace in seeking help, whether it be a talking therapy, a pill to tide you over this very difficult time, or sharing it with Gransnet. Please don't feel alone - we are all here to help you. flowers

bobbi Sun 01-Jul-12 21:30:56

I am truly overwhelmed by the response to my post yesterday - you are all lovely, lovely people for caring enough to reply.

I think I will need a little time to 'open up' to you all as I don't want to appear needy or whiney. For now I will say that I have a past record of depression, and though I think I may be verging on another bout, I really feel that anxiety is a bigger issue at present, though I have never been diagnosed with this in the past and am not sure if it's the 'real deal' or not.

I'm finding it difficult to sleep and about a week ago I started taking 'kalms' to try and relieve this, they worked a treat but now I'm getting twinges in my chest (I know there is nothing wrong with my heart), my thinking is not clear and my appetite is being affected (NOT normal for me!).

I constantly have the feeling of being trapped, and am beginning to wonder if I'm going a little bit insane.

It does feel good to be able to talk on here though - I already feel as if I'm amongst friends.

I will continue to have a little whinge if that's ok - it's so nice to talk to grown up people who can read and write in REAL language! smile

Thank you all

Bobbi xx

Jacey Sun 01-Jul-12 21:36:42

flowers Bobbi ...just share when you're ready ...they'll always be someone around to chat with.

Have you ever thought about trying the Bach Flower Remedies?? They are herbal and non-addictive ...and as far as I'm aware give no side-effects.
Google them and see what you think ...most good chemists/health shops will stock some of the range.

whenim64 Sun 01-Jul-12 21:41:42

Bobbi, have you thought about having a quick checkup with your GP? I ask because when my sister had these symptoms she was found to be hyperthyroid, fortunately temporarily, and the anxiety and heart twinges were soon brought under control. No treatment needed after a few months and the symptoms subsided in a few days. Anxiety can be so debilitating and it can be treated so easily. If there are no physical reasons, that might to help to reduce these feelings.

Anagram Sun 01-Jul-12 21:53:17

bobbi, it does sound as though you're in a state of nervous anxiety - the symptoms you describe are exactly what I went through some time ago. The sleep disturbances, loss of appetite and chest twinges are typical - I was also very conscious of my heartbeat and panicked if I thought it was too fast!
I would pay a visit to your GP, as when advises. You won't have to be on medication for ever - as soon as you get the anxiety under control, if you're anything like me the symptoms will disappear and you'll be in control of your life again. smile

Butternut Sun 01-Jul-12 21:53:23

Bobbi It's good to hear from you. Sounds to me you have an clear insight to how you are feeling, which is a good sign.
Keep expressing yourself, although I appreciate your sensitivity in opening up - and wisely so.
Visit your GP, as has been mentioned, and know that you are not alone with this. I think that is important.

bobbi Sun 01-Jul-12 21:58:01

I had an 'MOT' a few months ago and physically everything was ok - though last year there was a flutter of hyperthyroidism - these symptoms have only occurred in the last week though which makes me think they may be linked to the valerian extract in the Kalms.

I think I may try out the Bach flower remedies - I haven't tried them but I have heard that they can be quite effective.

It's hard to know at this age (early 50's) if things are physical (menopause), psychological (empty nest syndrome) or just me going bonkers!

Notsogrand Sun 01-Jul-12 22:07:34

Hello bobbi. If you are going bonkers you'll be in good company here! grin
Seriously though....the Bach remedies are very good. Their Rescue Remedy is excellent for anxiety, stress, jitteryness.