to feel hurt by my Mum or should I have got over it by now?

Your story is so familiar with me nanaej when my DH's mother died her house was very strangely secretly cleared of everything of any value by the very daughter who had never spoken to her mother for over 20 years! We were left with loads of old rubbish and the bill for a couple of skips.

I love your saying "farted rainbows" and I intend to use it at least once today, hopefully more!

I have a brother that used to fart rainbows but, since Mum became 'confused', she thinks he is having an affair and has left his wife so is no longer her favourite. That doesn't mean I am - the other brother is now!!

Though, actually, no-one would dare either fart or use the word in my Mum's presence.

Great expression kitty but tough situation. I remember feeling angry, periodically, with my mother after her death.
Have you any knowledge/understanding of her upbringing and why she favoured the boys and failed to establish a close bond with you?

I suspect her mother (who lost a baby son) preferred her remaining son to my mother, Jess, and my mother too lost my younger brother's twin when he was 2. Very sad for my parents, his twin and me.

As I have mentioned before, my Mum is a huge snob and, I think, married my father, partly, because his family was well off. We were never as 'comfortable' as she would have liked and she felt very hard done by and disappointed.

DH has a good job, I stayed at home and I suspect that she was disappointed that, instead of living as she thought we should, we had 5 children, are very family orientated and didn't do the social things she expected of people in 'our position'

Youngest brother, though, has tons of money, one child and does everything expected of him - big cars, flash holidays etc.

I think I've mentioned before that my Mum used to tell people that I 'had help with the children'. When I asked her why, she said 'I wouldn't like people to think that you were barefoot and pregnant in a council house'. Rather than relishing the 5 grandchildren, she seemed embarrassed about them Although now she enjoys the kudos of having (my) 5 great grandchildren.

Flipping families [grrrrr]