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So upset

(61 Posts)
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JammieB Fri 30-Aug-13 12:37:12

Nor sure if I am posting this in the right forum but need some help.

About a month ago my son in law accused me of something that I did not and would never ever do! He knows now that he was wrong and how desperately hurt I was, however it appears that he is not prepared to apologise

My daughter has now invited my DH and I for dinner with them, I don't know if she knows the truth about what happened as it remains a huge "elephant in the room" - I did have coffee with her a week ago and the subject was studiously avoided, she is very confrontational and prickly at the best of times, I understand that her first loyalty must be to her husband and maybe he has dismissed it from his mind at the same time as he "unfriended" me on Facebook rather than apologise - however it has pushed me right to the verge of a nervous breakdown - I can't sleep, burst into tears regularly and lost a lot of weight.

However I know that the only way I can see my grandchildren is to go to their house - I know I have to go and be the "bigger person" but the thought of being in his company makes me feel sick - I love my daughter and grandchildren so much but he makes my skin crawl - can anybody give me any coping techniques?

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rockgran Tue 22-Oct-13 17:06:48

You have my sympathy. When I have a problem rolling about in my head (caused by the kids of course) I write it down in my Toxic Thoughts diary. It is an online private diary called Penzu. When the problem has eased (as they do eventually) I delete it. However, at 3 am when I can't sleep it is a great release.

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Flowerofthewest Tue 22-Oct-13 22:58:03

What a great idea rockgran, I often have Toxic Thoughts that keep me awake at night, a hard lump in my tummy and feelings of dread. It is usually to do with worries (often unfounded) regarding one or two of my children. Will look up Penzu.Thank you xx flowers

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petallus Wed 23-Oct-13 03:41:12

Here I am at gone 3 30 in the morning about to write in my newly opened Penzu diary!

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rockgran Wed 23-Oct-13 13:54:04

I hope it helps. At least you can put your worries in a box and get them out of your head. I also use my online diary for holiday journals and nice things too. I just keep that one locked up.

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petallus Wed 23-Oct-13 16:02:34

I couldn't entirely work out how to do Penzu. Is it best to open an online link? Also I locked it and then the lock disappeared on next opening. Do you have to relock each time.

Well, it was the middle of the night and my brain might not have been quite up to speed. Shall try again but any advice welcome.

My old method was to scribble everything down in Pitman's shorthand which nobody else could read.

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rockgran Wed 23-Oct-13 18:20:58

Hi Petallus, I saved the website on my bookmarks toolbar (Firefox) Once you have chosen a "lock password" you can save it so you just choose "lock entry" using the "password on file". Penzu is free but the free version isn't available as an app yet - for ipad, etc. so you need to be using a proper computer unless you want to pay. I think you need to play around with it to get the hang of it. You can put photos in, share entries by email, etc. I find it quite useful for any sort of written document.

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mrsmopp Sun 27-Oct-13 09:08:40

Jammie, any chance of an update on here? You had a lot of excellent advice on here from your GN friends, do please let us know what the situation is now. We are all on your side, and hope you are in a better place than when you originally posted.
Thinking of you.... (flowers)

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mrsmopp Sun 27-Oct-13 09:09:56

Why didn't the flowers thing work????
Well the thought was there ..

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KatyK Sun 27-Oct-13 11:35:36

I think you need to use square brackets mrs mopp

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mrsmopp Sun 27-Oct-13 12:38:20

Oops!
flowers
got it!

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