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AIBU

DD huge family take priority

(84 Posts)
KatyK Mon 16-Jun-14 18:39:08

Mine is a daughter, not a son but we still seem to be at the back of the queue these days sad I would still advise say nowt though. My DD accused me of being 'up my own bum' when I asked why she went on outings with her friends and their mums and I was the only one not invited.

Mishap Mon 16-Jun-14 18:11:26

I am beginning to think I am very lucky to have produced only daughters! But, having said that, they do seem to get on fine with their MILs who have a fair share of time with the GC.

Shoreham - the only advice I can give you is to say nowt! - it will open up a much bigger can of worms. I can understand how you are feeling and it is very hard; but least said and all that - your turn will come one way or another, but not if relations become soured.

KatyK Mon 16-Jun-14 17:58:47

Not shame on you at all Kiora. I would feel the same. I think a lot of us feel we are at the back of the queue. Unfortunately I didn't keep my mouth shut once. It made matters worse, so I keep it zipped now, although at times I am bursting with annoyance.

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 16-Jun-14 17:40:34

Not shame on you at all kiora. Not at all sure I could keep my mouth shut.

Kiora Mon 16-Jun-14 17:36:13

It's really hard isn't it shoreham. I hate the feeling that I get over this sort of stuff. I always feel as if we come at the end of the queue. My DiL, my son took her farther and mother out for a meal yesterday for Father's Day. We weren't invited. It rather sticks in my craw that it's my sons money that pays for all this stuff. The big green monster strikes again. But I keep my big mouth shut. I bought him up to be responsible and he is. He puts his wife and children first. That's how it should be. But I don't like it. Not one bit. They are not horrible to us. She can be very sweet and generous just not as generous as she is with her own family. envy envy shame on me

annodomini Mon 16-Jun-14 17:24:54

You say you saw GC for 30 minutes on day 2, but don't say how long ago that was. Weeks? Months? Do you have a friendly relationship with your DiL's extended family?

kittylester Mon 16-Jun-14 17:15:50

Wise words roses!

rosesarered Mon 16-Jun-14 16:47:48

Hello shoreham do you mean [daughter-in-law] DIL rather than DD [dear daughter?] If so, I am afraid that Mother-in-law always takes a back seat to the other Mother, it's just the way it is. Depends how your son reacts to it and tries to arrange things.As a MIL I never drop in, but always arrange with DIL beforehand.I am aware that her family probably do drop in , but your own Mum is different.I think as the grandchildren grow older it will become easier to arrange things, maybe have them stay over with you for a break. Try not to let it become a sore point.

shoreham55 Mon 16-Jun-14 16:39:48

DD has large local family. Saw grandchild for 30 mins on day 2, since then not at all, although DD has her family round to the house( that I provided) daily. Have asked to be allowed round for 10 mins. Son says I mustn't keep tally but I do feel last in the queue. I know they are tired and have offered help strictly on the basis of tell me and I'll do it. DD family just pop in whenever they like and stay as long as they like. how do I stop beginning to feel resentful about this lack of fairness? I know exactly equal time isn't going to happen but I would like to feel that I am not the inconvenient after thought.