Would you let them stay in the same room? ?

I stand corrected Indiana but that doesn't change my stance.

Put them in separate rooms, next to each other if possible, and turn a blind eye to nighttime rambles.

And I would agree with you loopy - whether or not 16 is too young, this is all about respect for the grandparents. If they feel uncomfortable about it, then their feelings should prevail.

No, they wouldn't be sleeping together in my house at that age. If they were older and in a long term relationship I wouldn't mind at all but not sixteen year olds.

When our second eldest daughter was engaged to be married, at age 21, we visited her fiance`s parents house, and on going upstairs to the bathroom, I noticed the double bed that we knew they`d bought, all made up in her fiance`s bedroom. She stayed over there every weekend, and we obviously knew that it wasn`t all innocent, but I still didn`t like being confronted with the evidence, and that was in 1986.

If their parents are ok with it I would be as well. I was in a stable sexual relationship at 16 , pity I married him but that's another issue altogether!

Good god,is nothing sacred any more.No wonder there's so many screwed up kids today.They are too young,For goodness sakes hold on to your principles.They will have more respect for you.

If both sets of parents are ok with them sharing a room I would trust their judgement and let GS and girlfriend share. There are mature 16 year olds and there are very immature 20 somethings. If you feel completely uncomfortable about it, your house, your rules. I met my husband when I was 16 and he was 18. Reader I married him at 19 and have been happily married 37 years.

I would, but that's me - you must do what you feel most comfortable with.

I think that is exactly the problem, getting into a relationship at such a young age, I did the same thing and married him. It's too young, I often, when married, wished I had had a life as a single adult before meeting my husband.

Whether the marriage lasts or not, whether you don't marry but are in a relationship, you miss out on being a single young adult making your own decisions. You miss out on growing up as an individual.

Sixteen years olds should be encouraged to be what they are, teenagers with lots of growing up still to do.

Might it not depend on the couple Faye? We have always had our own interests, our own friends. I was a fiery young Cosmopolitan, Guardian Women's pages reading girl.
My husband is the least stifling man I know. He grew up with several sisters, perhaps that helps?
The other thing that did cross my mind is by not allowing them to share a room you might appear to be questioning the parent's morals, judgement but it's your home, do what you feel comfortable with Springchicken.

Agree with Elegran, both theoretically and in practice. Regardless of what may happen elsewhere my older GDs have spontaneously told me that they just wouldn't in my home. Possibly having younger siblings and DS (their father!) also staying over is also a strong factor.

Not at allJamJar they are too young, very much walking before you can crawl. Why would anyone want their sixteen year old to be in a long term, sexual relationship. What happens if it ends in pregnancy.

I realise sixteen years old are sometimes in a sexual relationship but I have seen parents who more than encourage this. Where the relationship could be boyfriend/girlfriend with time for friends and family allowing them to spend nights together throws them together as a defacto couple. Girls who have their boyfriends regularly sleeping over will have less times for their friends.

Agree,Faye,well said.
I have a 16 year old great niece.She's so mature and sensible and clever and a lovely girl.And,thankfully at the moment more interested in her school work.

I know that teens have sex but just think that facilitating 'coupledon' for two 16 year old schoolkids is not helpful.

Why should they expect to share a bed whenever they go to a relative's house?

Acting like a married couple when they should be doing their homework!

I wouldn't encourage it, but I would offer them separate rooms. sometimes the girls find themselves under pressure to have sex and if they are in the same room it would be difficult. Therfore separate rooms in my house or as someone said maybe have a word with the parents to suss the situation out, it may be that they stay over at home but they may sleep apart. Im glad my girl is past that stage.

Ask their parents what they would like you to do. If they're already sleeping together it's silly for you to separate them.

My dear MiL appeared embarrassed when we shared a room shortly AFTER we got married!

I wouldn't have a problem with it, but have you considered that they may not want to sleep together in your house, so I would check that that's what they really want first, just because they do in their parents house doesn't mean they want to with the next generation up. apart from that I would want a quiet chat with them about safe sex and behaving responsibly, or at least check that their parents have already done this. Above all it sounds like they are in a monogamous (hopefully loving) relationship in my book it's a healthy part of growing up.

It's a difficult age old dilemma but I think I would agree that separate rooms would be the best solution and not let them think you've contemplated anything different. They may well be very relieved you've made the decision for them! Having been pregnant myself at 16 when my son's girlfriend moved in when they were both just turned 17 I made them have separate rooms as my youngest son was only 14 at the time. However when he himself brought his girlfriend to stay I was more relaxed about it (he had left home at 16 so I thought there probably wouldn't be anything he didn't know anyway!). I've now come full circle and am slightly shocked that my 18 year old granddaughter is obviously sleeping with her bf - must be an age thing!

My grandson and his lovely girlfriend have been together for nearly three years since they were 16 and 15. I wouldn't have a problem with them staying in one room...they do at my daughter's.

Saying that they have to respect your wishes and if you are uncomfortable with it tell them. I am sure they will be fine

I think I'd speak to my grandson in your position. Another contributor said they might not want to sleep together at your house and that is a distinct possibility.
Another possibility however is that they might not come or not come so often or stay for so long if you insist on them sleeping separately and that might disappoint you.
Surely the best thing is to speak to your grandson and tell him that you feel uncomfortable but that it's very important to you to have them to stay and how much you're looking forward to spending time with them? You might find he offers to sleep separately from his girlfriend rather than upset you and then you'll have worried for no reason. Let's hope so.

I would put them in separate rooms if the idea of them being together makes you uncomfortable. They will only be with you a short time and I am sure they could manage to survive being separated overnight!

I think it's very inconsiderate of your Grandson, his girlfriend and both sets of parents to put you in this position. They are not showing a lot of respect for you. It's your house with your rules.

It's your house, so you must do what makes you comfortable. If you've got room, give them a room each. If they're desperate for a bonk, they'll sneak next door in dead of night, and you can turn a blind eye!